somegirl313 Posted November 18, 2019 Share Posted November 18, 2019 Before you read, I will probably be shamed for taking this guy back, but he expressed his remorse over what he did and it seemed genuine to me so I decided to give him one last chance. I told him the past will be left in the past and if he ever brings the past up again, then we're over for good. He's kept his word and has never brought up the past since, so things have been good between us. However...just yesterday I snooped and found something out that has been bothering me, even though it happened 3 months ago. My boyfriend doesn't have close friends so he often uses Reddit's relationship advice forum to vent/ask for advice. With my detective skills and no I did not snoop on his phone, I found his Reddit account and saw a post he made from August that really bothers me, but I don't know how to bring it up or if I should. It's a post that he actually deleted, but I found a way to look at deleted posts from Reddit. This was during the time where our relationship was becoming very toxic and we were fighting constantly. He made a post saying that he is afraid he might cheat on me after how much we've been arguing...which killed me to read because I NEVER expected that of him. He wrote that before we started fighting, no other girl could come between us and that he was never tempted to get at any other girl. But anyways, he wrote that it happened at the gym, that a girl asked him if he was done using the equipments and made small talk with him, possibly being flirty. He wrote that there was a "chemistry" or "lust" between the two of them and that he was tempted to ask for her number, but didn't because he was with me. And then he said that it isn't like he's unhappy with me, but it's that he isn't AS happy as before. Reading all of this killed me inside and I cried... because even though we were fighting so much during that time I never once thought of cheating on him or anything of the sort. A few weeks after this, he was venting in a thread and wrote that while he was hanging out with his brothers, he walked by a girl that was checking him out and he said that if he was single, he definitely would have gone up to her and asked for her number. I feel really sh*tty for snooping, but I feel like he isn't honest with me and he keeps things like this from me, so I have to find out on my own by snooping his Reddit account...I haven't been well after finding this out and he knows I've been upset about something but he has no idea what it is. I'm not sure if I should even bring it up as it may tear us apart, because it did happen in August and we had agreed to leave the past in the past.. I'm not even sure if I want to be with him anymore, I'm just so torn about everything. My birthday is in a week and he has a big surprise planned for me, even called the day off work for me. We have plans for the future together, we planned to celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas together, go to Disneyland in December for our anniversary, go to a New Years rave together, even take classes together next semester... I really don't know what to do. Any advice or help would be appreciated. Link to comment
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