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Ex Boyfriend Invited me to dinner/movies


Ellaho
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Maybe some of you have read my previous posts and whatnot but the summary of it is im 18 and he is 19, we dated for three years and broke up almost 6 months ago. At first we became fwb but i broke it off in august/early September.

 

Yesterday night my ex and I were talking (we have been in regular contact) and I asked how his party was on friday night and he said it was okay and admitted that while he was out at a party he realised how ungrateful he was. He has jokingly said “can i be your boyfriend” or maybe seriously im not sure but usually I brush it off. Yesterday he asked if we could go out for dinner and movies I havent exactly gave him an answer as I am getting ready for an event. During this time we both have not seen or spoken to anyone new.

 

Does anyone have any tips on how i should take this on. I don’t exactly want to get back without easing into it. I do still have feelings for him.

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Do not have sex with him until you feel that you can genuinely trust him. That would require a lengthy period of him being consistent. If you think you can do that, then go out with him. But you need to leave your expectations out the door for a long time if you are going to do that as he may bolt again.

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If you want to have dinner and see a movie with him I don't see why not. I very strongly recommend you do NOT end the evening with sex, however.

 

I’ve already said i didnt want sex and he said it was fine. The thing is his birthday is also a few days aterwards if we do go out should we split the bill,let him pay or should i pay.

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I’ve already said i didnt want sex and he said it was fine. The thing is his birthday is also a few days aterwards if we do go out should we split the bill,let him pay or should i pay.

 

I don't think it's a good idea to go out with him since you two broke up. However, if you really want to go out with him and still have feelings for him, then it sounds like you really want to be with him. Enforce healthy boundaries. Remain polite yet firm.

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I honestly do not know why anyone is even entertaining the idea of OP should meet her ex. The conditions of the pseudo-date seems irrelevant to me.

 

She is clearly not over him. He clearly does not respect her. His motives are crystal clear, her lack of boundaries is obvious. The result is going to be predictable. Even if he does not charm her panties off on this occasion, she is going to be asking "he did x, he did y, what does it mean? does he love me? should I give him another chance?" in a few days.

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I'm with you, MirrorKnight.

 

I see this ending badly for you, OP. You are going to get your hopes up and he will more than likely dash them all over again.

 

Personally, I would not go. But you will, because you desperately want him back. Just keep your friends and family close by for the inevitable next round of heartache.

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OP, this is a guy who was selfish enough to try to have his cake and eat it too with you. He is someone who has demonstrated capability of putting his sexual urges above your emotional and mental well-being. Remember that. It is very unlikely that things will end up the way you wish. Ideally, you should realize this and walk away. If you need to give it one last shot, imo, that's ok but you need to have zero expectations going in. This guy sounds too young and too immature to do the right thing. It's on you to protect yourself.

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You are not seeking advice and wish to continue your fwb situation and that's fine.

 

https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=561766&p=7163646#post7163646

I’m a 18F, my ex (19M) have been broken up for nearly 4 months after a 3 year relationship. Guess considering my indecisiveness its best to start a journal instead of asking for advice. Since our breakup, we have continued contact and had a fwb situation
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"Can I be your boyfriend?" was a line he used because he wanted to fish for information. How you reacted would of determined how he proceeded. Since you brushed it off, that gave him permission to continue to pursue you.

Remember. Spoiled milk doesn't get better if you put it back in the fridge. You two broke up for a reason and you should just let him go because there is better out there for you.

But since you like him you two will get back and he is going to lie to you to get you back. I know I would be telling you whatever you want to hear so I can get back with you. So remember to make him back up his words with actions.

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