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Did i blow it?..


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This girl that I knew for a while broke up with her BF. A couple of months after the break up( summer time) I noticed that she would comment on my photos more than usual. I remember posting a shirtless picture, and she commented saying it was a good picture. Her and I ended up going on vacation at the same time ( different locations) I mentioned us getting together when we both got back and she agreed. I told her to call me when she got back and we would plan something. After she got back she never contacted me directly, she went on commenting on a video that I had posted and said.. " that looks like fun, I want to go".. I just liked what she said and kept it moving.... last I heard from her was bout a month ago... When I look back at the situation I think to myself.... did I blow it?... was she trying to get my attention indirectly?.... I never did set up a place to hang out with her, cuz she never contacted me directly.... should I reach out and see what's up, or is it to late...

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Agree with Wiseman. Hard to know if we've "blown it" if we never quite blow, you know?


I get the Instagram stuff. It's fun, and it can be a genuine mode of flirting. But you only know how genuine it is if you raise the ante, otherwise you spin in a loop. So next time someone is all "that looks like fun!" you can respond with more than the little heart option but with something like "what are you doing this weekend? i'd love to hang away from the screen." Maybe that leads to margaritas and marriage, maybe silence, maybe a return to nebulous comments on your thirst trap posts. But at least you'd know, and when we know there is no doubt about what's blown, or not.


As for her? A month is a blink. If you're interested, show her. Comment on something, see if she comments back, or pokes in some way. Then see if the sideways stuff can become a straight arrow by asking her out.

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Give me a call when you get back?

That's a little vague. . Be assertive, especially in light of her continued interest on social media.

Does she even have your phone number?


Maybe too much time passed and she lost the nerve or wasn't entirely sure. Maybe she is wondering why you did ask her out directly.

How about you call her and ask her out?

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You're both very passive. Someone needs to step up. She doesn't have the guts to call you so ask her out. The social media commentary is getting a bit lame at this point. If she doesn't want to move forward or meet with you, at least you'll have your answer. I agree with the others and ask her out more directly.

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She could've gotten a new bf during all the time you played cyber space buddies. "Hi, X. I hope you had a great vacation. I'm going to Octoberfest this Saturday and it'd be so much more fun if you could go with me."


A woman who is truly interested will accept, or if she has plans, will always tell you of an alternate date which she can do something. That's a quick way to get your answer.

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