shhs Posted October 1, 2019 Share Posted October 1, 2019 I was seeing a great guy for about 6 weeks. We went out around 2x per week, talked every day (75% of the time initiated by him), some of our dates lasted all day. We had a ton in common. I just generally felt like things were going in the right direction. We talked about how both of us were looking for relationships, so I never got the feeling that we weren't at least heading that direction. I felt like I was ready for him to meet my friends, so I asked him what he was doing next weekend. He said "hanging out with you!". And I was like, let me know if you aren't ready to meet my friends, but if you are my friend is having a birthday party this weekend at a beer tasting event and you could come if you are interested. He said he would like to go and that it sounded fun. I saw him later in the week and we had a great dinner during which he asked me what the details were for this event. Fast forward to the Friday before, he calls me out of the blue and ended things. I asked if I was putting too much pressure on him by inviting him to the event, and he said it wasn't that specifically, just in general he was feeling like we were moving toward a relationship and he just felt that as that approached he realized he wasn't ready to be in a relationship. I asked him if we could talk later after I had some time to process. A couple of days later we talked and had a very emotional conversation. He reiterated what he said before about no being ready to mentally commit to a relationship. He had told me previously that he struggled with anxiety and that was definitely impacting his decision making. I asked him if he felt like something felt wrong with me specifically or if it was just committing in general and he said he can't pinpoint anything specifically he just doesn't feel ready. I asked if there was any way to take things slow and keep seeing each other and he just said no. When I told him I was going to miss getting to know him he cried! And then he cried again when I told him I hope he takes the time to work on himself because I want him to be happy. I just feel like he got scared and ran away. I know I can't put myself in his head and I don't know if he was being 100% honest with me. But I can't shake the feeling that he gave up too soon. I mean we only dated for 6 weeks, and we were both getting upset at the thought of ending it. I'm struggling to move on and stop thinking about him because it just doesn't make sense to me. I don't understand what it means to not feel ready. What do I do? Link to comment
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