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I want to try new things now...


Cdlove
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So I have been dating my boyfriend for a while now... he’s my first boyfriend and I am definitely taking things slow! Like I communicate when I do not like something and he understands.. but I am getting to the point where I am curious about a guy’s body because I’ve never touched a guys body lol. Like I want to see what a man’s body feels like but I’m a little shy and don’t know how to approach him. He usually takes lead in things for when I am okay with it but I’m just a little shy when it comes to things like this. I mean, I just think it’s coz I’m not confident to touch him because it’s something I’ve never done. Any tips for a newbie like me about relationships in general? Before I thought of marriage before sex, but I feel like my morals have changed. From my previous post, i said that I believed in sex after marriage, but someone on that thread said that I should really have strong morals for that. After thinking about it, it was only because my parents told me not to have sex. But I started really thinking and thinking if that’s what I really believed in and after learning a bit of things while being in a relationship, I learned that it’s okay to have sex before marriage as long as you know you won’t regret it. So, sorry for more mixed feelings to those people who continuously respond to my threads .

Edited by Cdlove
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There's a lot of responsibility when it comes to sex. Knowing and understanding the effectiveness of condoms/birth control/your partner getting tested. Also sex is not a currency to buy you a committed relationship. People have sex just to have sex. There might be times when sex happens once and the guy moves on. Choose your actions carefully.

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Sexuality is human desire. What you are feeling is normal but despite the fact that the world is overly sexualized doesn't mean you have to rush into anything.

 

Sex is about more then the physical. There is a great deal of emotion that goes along with it. Your parents aren't against sex but they do want you to slow your pace so that you are ready for all that sex entails.

 

For now, go slow. Learn some of the practical medical things. Talk to you mom about the morals. Learn about pregnancy, the prevention of pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases & their prevention. Armed with information, you will better be able to make the right decision for you.

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I read your previous thread. Only one person said you should change your morals. The rest said your morals are yours and very personal and you shouldn't change them for anyone.

 

Please go to a clinic and get educated on birth control and STDs. And don't let your boyfriend, who gave you the BS line that he's "in pain" when you grind on each other and don't end up having sex, pressure you into sexual activity you're not ready for.

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What would your plan be if an unexpected pregnancy should occur? After all, there's no type of BC that is completely 100%. In addition to that you need to understand that you're both equally responsible for the use of BC.

 

Keep in mind that you need to educate yourself before taking that first step. Your call...

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Yes, I know I should educate myself before actually having sex and I PLAN to! I still have things to learn about sex and I have set a rule for myself to not have sex before actually learning because I do not want to be unprepared. And yes I know that sex does not keep a man! I have seen that through my own eyes with my other siblings. But yes, I think only one person said things about my morals, but I have changed my thoughts FOR ME (not for my boyfriend, not for anyone) and I just wanted to share that out even thought it wouldn’t really matter to others lol. I definitely have a lot to learn and I am willing to actually learn so I thank you guys for advice about relationships and sex in general.

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sex for females at 18 is different for males at 18. most females will need commitment and loyalty to be vulnerable enough to have sex at 18 but males don't need that. sure he's in a relationship with you now but it's highly unlikely you're going to be it for him and he'll never be with anyone else.

 

i personally was not ready for sex until my mid 20's. i knew guys needed to have sex with a bunch of women before settling down and i didn't want to be used or another conquest. so i waited, but that's just me. and i didn't even end up with the guy i first had sex with but i was way more prepared for it mentally in my mid 20's than i was at 18, again that's just me.

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