Capttrae 37 Posted September 2, 2019 Share Posted September 2, 2019 This is something I wrote a few months ago, pretty personal but I thought maybe it may help someone like it did me. Suicide- reasons to- 1) I’m totally unhappy, ass deep on stupid debt, I see no point in continuing Reasons not to- I’m selfish enough to stay around to see a Thomas graduate college, have a family, and see my grandkids. I want to hunt another duck, deer, goose and turkey season, I want to complete the Royal slam of turkeys, hunt seaducks in Maine and Alaska, whitetail in Saskatchewan. I’m so selfish. I don’t want to hurt Thomas or my Dad, I can’t even begin to imagine the pain and guilt my Dad would feel if I did that. Although he shouldn’t feel guilty, he’s been a great dad, someone strong, stable, and provided well for his family. I can only imagine how I would feel if Thomas were to do that and I can’t do that to him. I also can’t imagine hurting Thomas anymore than I already have, even though I’m a complete failure as a father I love him with all my heart and can’t bring myself to hurt him Quote Link to post Share on other sites
mustlovedogs 264 Posted September 2, 2019 Share Posted September 2, 2019 It’s not selfish to want to have experiences and to make sure your loved ones aren’t hurt. :) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
TeeDee 27 Posted September 2, 2019 Share Posted September 2, 2019 I'm glad you are still here. Thomas is lucky to have you. My friend killed himself 13 years ago & his son is still affected by it. Try making a plan to manage the debt & change the things you don't like about yourself. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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