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Is she testing me/trying to make me jealous, or just not interested?


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So this girl and I were friends for a year..we almost started hanging out alone but but it became a mess..she had a bf...I backed off, then she messaged me asking how I was. I noticed she broke up with her bf so I said we should hang out...she said she was going on vacation but wanted to hang out when she got back...I told her let me know when she gets back and well plan something...that was 3 weeks ago...I texted her yesterday...she never texted back but then showed up to my work with another guy...they didnt seem particularly interested in each other and she didn't say hi to me or anything. Seemed very odd she would come right into my work after ignoring me...it felt more like a test to see if I'd get jealous..or am I reading into it?

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It seems a bit small-minded and petty to do such a thing. If you suspect she's even a bit like that, that's not very attractive. I think it's a better idea to stay away from negative thoughts like that and move forwards. You didn't mention what you think of her - whether she's someone you'd want to date seriously or whether she's just someone you might see casually. If you're just wondering outloud about her as a person, my answer is that she's not interested and don't dwell on this at all. There are plenty of other people to meet.

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Let it go. At best this was always and still is in the friendzone. Don't waste your time on her if you want a gf. Stop prowling her social media.

she had a bf.

I noticed she broke up with her bf so I said we should hang out.

she never texted back but then showed up to my work with another guy.

she didn't say hi to me or anything.

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For all intents and purposes, she's not acting like someone who is interested in you what with bringing all these men around.

 

I think you're trying to find a hidden message but I think it's pretty basic, if she's not with you, she's not interested.

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she didn't say hi to me or anything. Seemed very odd she would come right into my work after ignoring me...it felt more like a test to see if I'd get jealous..or am I reading into it?

 

Sounds to me like the guy she was with wanted to go shop at your workplace , she didn’t acknowledge you , so quite clearly you are NOT friends.

Why do YOU think you are? And why did you not acknowledge her???? If she is a so called friend?

 

Your post doesn’t make sense. Tell us the real story?

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I don't think she's trying to make you jealous, OP.

 

I think she's just plain not interested and doesn't really care what you think of her bringing another guy around you. If anything, it's a rather indirect message that she has someone else on her radar and you would be best to stop contacting her.

 

EDIT: This woman? https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=560984&page=2 Yes, you would be best to drop any notion of being with her. She's not into the way you are into her.

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I would have been interested in a relationship, but last month I didnt know my future...i told her I was probly moving to florida... but since then plans changed and I'll still be living in the same city. I feel like I dont know her well but as far as personality I like her but behavior wise actually has been turning me off quite a bit lately. She usually texts me when another pretty girl comments on my facebook.

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You just wanted to have sex with her, right?

 

You're expending a lot of thought on someone you just want to "do". Surely there are other women you can have casual flings with.

 

What did the OP say that would elicit such a response? Really, enlighten me, a guy mentions nothing about anything sexual and then your question comes out of the blue.

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So this girl and I were friends for a year..we almost started hanging out alone but but it became a mess..she had a bf...I backed off, then she messaged me asking how I was. I noticed she broke up with her bf so I said we should hang out...she said she was going on vacation but wanted to hang out when she got back...I told her let me know when she gets back and well plan something...that was 3 weeks ago...I texted her yesterday...she never texted back but then showed up to my work with another guy...they didnt seem particularly interested in each other and she didn't say hi to me or anything. Seemed very odd she would come right into my work after ignoring me...it felt more like a test to see if I'd get jealous..or am I reading into it?

 

Man, ghost her and keep it moving. If she gets smart, tell her that you'll take night classes in high order mathematics if you want to get tested.

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no.. she's not trying to make you jealous. she just doesn't see you like that. a girl interested and wanting you, would not go out and get ANOTHER BOYFRIEND and have a relationship with somebody else - to get YOU jealous. that's not how it works. Nor would they ignore you and not follow thru on wanting to see you if they TRULY wanted to see you.

 

she has zero for you romantically. accept that and move on.

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What did the OP say that would elicit such a response? Really, enlighten me, a guy mentions nothing about anything sexual and then your question comes out of the blue.

 

In the thread you just quoted he said he would be fine with a FWB situation with this woman. That's where I got it.

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I would have been interested in a relationship, but last month I didnt know my future...i told her I was probly moving to florida... but since then plans changed and I'll still be living in the same city. I feel like I dont know her well but as far as personality I like her but behavior wise actually has been turning me off quite a bit lately. She usually texts me when another pretty girl comments on my facebook.

 

I'd say listen to your instincts on this one and if her behaviour is odd to you, it probably really is odd. People may be going through whatever else they're going through in their lives to contribute to their outwards demeanor. Don't internalize that and keep on listening to your instincts. I'm not sure what she's texting you about but you might reconsider answering her texts next time.

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In the thread you just quoted he said he would be fine with a FWB situation with this woman. That's where I got it.

 

I didn't say FWB was my intent...someone brought it up and I said if that's what she wanted I'm fine with it, but the issue was the confusion about what does she want. My only intent is hang out have fun, sex doesnt need to be involved because I actually value the person for who they are. Not that I dont want it..its just not the most meaningful thing to me in a relationship or friendship.

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Don't play dumb mind games with her. Since she's ignoring you, ignore her back. Leave her alone. Don't try to figure her out.

 

She's unstable and doesn't stick to her word. You deserve a lady who will show you respect. Move on. Be smart.

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Well I don't know if technically she's done anything wrong? You guys have only ever been friends/acquaintances and never anything more, right? You had never been on any dates. When you'd discussed hanging out, it may have been assumed that it was only as friends. She probably likes your attention when she has no other guys going but yeah other than that she doesn't seem interested at all. She doesn't really owe you anything because you are not anything to each other. You're not even close friends. She can do what she wants with other guys. I think the message is quite clear that she's not into you so you should probably just forget about her and move on.

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I didn't say FWB was my intent...someone brought it up and I said if that's what she wanted I'm fine with it, but the issue was the confusion about what does she want.

 

If you are GENUINELY interested in dating someone , you would NEVER settle for fwb.

So either you aren’t genuinely interested or are a sucker for punishment.

 

But that’s assuming she is interested in anything more than platonic but she has NOT ever given any indication that she is. ?

 

I just read your previous post about her and you asked if her bar had a microphone to which she replied no.

Later tagged you in a karaoke event at her bar. And you got cranky thinking she lied!

Umm karaoke bring their own microphones, speakers etc!!!

 

Dude , I’m sorry , but this girl has NOT indicated any non platonic interest in you at all.

I’m sorry you misinterpreted!

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  • 10 months later...
So this girl and I were friends for a year..we almost started hanging out alone but but it became a mess..she had a bf...I backed off, then she messaged me asking how I was. I noticed she broke up with her bf so I said we should hang out...she said she was going on vacation but wanted to hang out when she got back...I told her let me know when she gets back and well plan something...that was 3 weeks ago...I texted her yesterday...she never texted back but then showed up to my work with another guy...they didnt seem particularly interested in each other and she didn't say hi to me or anything. Seemed very odd she would come right into my work after ignoring me...it felt more like a test to see if I'd get jealous..or am I reading into it?

Stay away. This is just too messy. Her bringing another guy to your work should tell you one thing. She doesn't give a about how you feel.

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