Life in the Driver’s Seat (extended)

[Seraphim]

Hubby went to the Jays game today . He is happy they are back playing at home . 
 

I am going to a vendor show with J and her daughter. We went to the movies on Friday. 
 

Everything in Ontario still requires masks. In about 2 weeks all restrictions might be lifted but masks indoors is going to be the one that persists for a while. 

[Seraphim]

 

Feeling better this morning . The anxiety last night was so bad I thought I was going to throw up. Moving is stressful especially when leaving your community and friends. Since I was born this will be move #38 for me . I hope it is close to the last. 8 more years of military life. I have been a military partner for 33 years and 27 of them as a wife and was a member for 13 years. We are a devoted family but definitely feeling the stress this APS. 

I want to go and have new opportunities and new friends and meet up with old friends, but terrified to leave behind what I have built. The strength it took to build it from absolutely nothing. When I came to * 11 years ago I didn’t know a single soul but for my child and my husband left for course 3 weeks later . Out of that I built a life that included volunteering, working , starting my own business and building a strong network of friends. I got far more involved in my faith community through joining community groups and music ministry. 

I have never been a quitter and I am sure I will rise to the challenge. I am persistent and have a dogged determination to succeed. 

Anxiety just reminds you, you are human. Moving IS stressful. We have had 3 deaths in the family within a year as well. Closing my business here was heart wrenching and will need strength to rebuild it in * 

I will put my armour on and show you strong I am. 
I am unstoppable today. I am invincible.

 

[Seraphim]

Vastly unimpressed with new house and so is hubby and son. I am going to have to give up half my furniture just to move in. 

And driving up the motor on the power steering of our truck died. 

[Jibralta]

Double oh no!!

[maritalbliss86]

On 8/2/2021 at 10:20 AM, Seraphim said:

Anxiety just reminds you, you are human. Moving IS stressful. We have had 3 deaths in the family within a year as well. Closing my business here was heart wrenching and will need strength to rebuild it in * 

I'm so glad you find strength and push through.  Hoping things get better.

[Seraphim]

10 hours ago, Jibralta said:

Double oh no!!

We have an appointment for the truck back home for Monday. I hope it is not a huge fix. 

[Seraphim]

1 hour ago, maritalbliss86 said:

I'm so glad you find strength and push through.  Hoping things get better.

Well, let’s just say I am hanging on by my fingernails and was worse today. I will have to go into more in a post later tonight. 

[Seraphim]

We are home again and settled down we got home last night. I have to say it was probably the worst DIT I’ve ever been on in my life. I think they decided to move the entire Forces this year and nobody was ready for the onslaught.

 

It’s so ridiculous but we still couldn’t get into our empty house. So my husband was talking with our CFHA contact and was a little frustrated. He didn’t say any bad words or say anything about her but just that he was going to talk to his boss about maybe getting us in to our house. She  went crying to her boss obviously who  then sent my husband a crappy email about him being irritated and CCed all his coworkers. 🤯🤯🤯🤯She said she did so hoping one of them was his boss. 😵‍💫😵‍💫 Okay, now we know you are a vindictive twunt. So my husband apologizes and said we’re just frustrated because we need to know how much furniture we can bring or get rid of and it had nothing to do with the girl herself but entirely the situation. And he asked for the number to apologize to the other lady himself. At which point the dragon calms down and says oh good well then I don’t have to contact your actual boss and CFHA where you’re living now. W.T.A.F. 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫🤯🤯 you really are a vindictive twunt waffle. And this is the woman I have to deal with to get my daycare approved??? Yeah I’m not dealing with you I’m going right to the manager forget that. I no longer trust her as far as I can fling her. 
 

Her acting like that set off a PTSD trigger making me feel not safe in my new home. and threatening the security of my present home . 
 

Now onto the hotel we said we were paying debit when we leave but of course they take a credit card to hold. So when we check out on the second day the dimwit has put it through on our credit card. And then goes oh ha ha Ha Ha Ha Ha there is a note that you’re paying debit oh  I’ll just cancel it but you know the credit cards are going to keep it on your account for five days. I had finally had enough and had to walk out or I was going to tell her this is not the credit card company‘s fault but yours for not doing your job properly. You just wanted to hit an easy button and print off all your receipts so you would have an easy day today and didn’t read the notes left for you so now I have to haul out another credit card to get my truck fixed because you screwed up this one. 
 

I am sick to friggin death of people being lazy and not doing their job properly and blaming Covid or whatever stupid situation they wanna blame it on. Just do your Effen job. 
 

Yep and on the drive up I think it was the hose for the power steering fluid that just blew. As fast as hubby could put it in it was flowing right out. He just about ripped off his arms and his back just trying to steer that thing for two days. It gets fixed Monday. 

[Seraphim]

For me and for everyone of course your home should be your safe space. And often for me as a child that was never a safe place. So now as an adult it is my supreme safe space and she threatened that. That has set off a towering cascade of anxiety for me. I am not sure how  long it will take to calm down. All because my husband said oh for god sake‘s this is ridiculous I’m going to talk to my boss because I need to know how much furniture I can bring or get rid of. Hardly a serious offence. And complete overreaction from the two broads. 

[Seraphim]

My husband is getting his extra months’ pay moving allowance mid month thankfully, but they combined it with his regular pay and took off $4000 for income tax. 🤯🤯🤯

[Seraphim]

My husband said he swallowed his anger and indignation and apologized so it would go smoothly for my daycare. He said you are THAT important. You are my everything. I swallowed my anger at her suggestion that you a moron for not being able to understand the dimensions of a floor plan . You are very visual and understand in 3 dimensions not two. She is more stupid not understanding that people don’t all learn and understand the same way. For the sake of not causing you and R more distress I just apologized. Sometimes you defeat the dragon that way. 

[Seraphim]

 

[maritalbliss86]

4 hours ago, Seraphim said:

My husband is getting his extra months’ pay moving allowance mid month thankfully, but they combined it with his regular pay and took off $4000 for income tax. 🤯🤯🤯

Is there any way you can fill out a tax form so that the extra $$$ is less taxed due to work-related expenses?  

That's what we do whenever he gets a lot extra for, "services," ... it REALLY helps, otherwise they tax the hell out of the extra $$$

[maritalbliss86]

4 hours ago, Seraphim said:

She  went crying to her boss obviously who  then sent my husband a crappy email about him being irritated and CCed all his coworkers. 🤯🤯🤯🤯She said she did so hoping one of them was his boss. 😵‍💫😵‍💫 Okay, now we know you are a vindictive twunt.

My husband had a similar thing happen a few months ago... a female on his job was doing really crappy stuff that was so unnecessary, and then getting irrationally angry and causing drama similar to how you describe.  She got into it with my husband and he backed down since it just revealed how awful she was to everyone else.  Multiple people were remarking on it, but SHE thought she had showed them all 🤷‍♂️.

Thankfully she resigned recently 🙏.   Everyone is safer, too.

 

[Seraphim]

1 hour ago, maritalbliss86 said:

Is there any way you can fill out a tax form so that the extra $$$ is less taxed due to work-related expenses?  

That's what we do whenever he gets a lot extra for, "services," ... it REALLY helps, otherwise they tax the hell out of the extra $$$

I think we can do that at tax time next year. 

[itsallgrand]

Ugh I'm sorry. I know when I get to that certain point, there's nothing to do but try and ride it out until I feel better. Can you take a time out to just do some nice simple stuff for you? 

 

 

 

[Seraphim]

1 hour ago, maritalbliss86 said:

My husband had a similar thing happen a few months ago... a female on his job was doing really crappy stuff that was so unnecessary, and then getting irrationally angry and causing drama similar to how you describe.  She got into it with my husband and he backed down since it just revealed how awful she was to everyone else.  Multiple people were remarking on it, but SHE thought she had showed them all 🤷‍♂️.

Thankfully she resigned recently 🙏.   Everyone is safer, too.

 

It really makes you wonder what the AF is happening in their head. 

[Seraphim]

24 minutes ago, itsallgrand said:

Ugh I'm sorry. I know when I get to that certain point, there's nothing to do but try and ride it out until I feel better. Can you take a time out to just do some nice simple stuff for you? 

 

 

 

I am hoping to book a facial for myself . 

[itsallgrand]

5 minutes ago, Seraphim said:

I am hoping to book a facial for myself . 

That sounds nice! 

[Seraphim]

1 hour ago, itsallgrand said:

That sounds nice! 

I got one booked for the 17th. I have never had one before so I am excited . 

[itsallgrand]

2 hours ago, Seraphim said:

I got one booked for the 17th. I have never had one before so I am excited . 

Oh yeah, that's going to be such a treat! I love how refreshed I feel afterwards. 

 

[Seraphim]

12 minutes ago, itsallgrand said:

Oh yeah, that's going to be such a treat! I love how refreshed I feel afterwards. 

 

Hahaha I am almost 55 and never had a facial done and only 1 massage in my life. Too much work and not enough pleasure. I need some joy . I have lost a lot of joy I noticed since I lost my music ministry. I loved it SO SO SO SO much. Maybe in my new home I can sing at my new church and rebuild my esteem. My esteem has not been very healthy lately. After I lost much of my church community activities I took somewhat of a nose dive. I thought about that the other day. Not enough soul building and self care yet again. It is getting me down. 

[boltnrun]

I've never had my nails done.  Not once.

I see how much it costs and I think, I could buy a bottle of nail polish at Target for a couple of dollars and do my nails myself.  I don't bother with my nails anymore anyway, I just keep them filed.  But people always act shocked when I tell them I've never had mine done.  I see it as an unnecessary expense, but apparently a lot of women love it!

I hope your facial is relaxing and enjoyable!

[Seraphim]

8 minutes ago, boltnrun said:

I've never had my nails done.  Not once.

I see how much it costs and I think, I could buy a bottle of nail polish at Target for a couple of dollars and do my nails myself.  I don't bother with my nails anymore anyway, I just keep them filed.  But people always act shocked when I tell them I've never had mine done.  I see it as an unnecessary expense, but apparently a lot of women love it!

I hope your facial is relaxing and enjoyable!

I love all the frilly expensive girl pampering . If I could do it all the time omg I would. But sadly not wealthy either , lol . 

[itsallgrand]

1 hour ago, Seraphim said:

Hahaha I am almost 55 and never had a facial done and only 1 massage in my life. Too much work and not enough pleasure. I need some joy . I have lost a lot of joy I noticed since I lost my music ministry. I loved it SO SO SO SO much. Maybe in my new home I can sing at my new church and rebuild my esteem. My esteem has not been very healthy lately. After I lost much of my church community activities I took somewhat of a nose dive. I thought about that the other day. Not enough soul building and self care yet again. It is getting me down. 

I think you figured it out on your own ❤️❤️. That's usually the case when my anxiety gets really bad too... some part of me is not getting what it needs, or is sad, or needs attention in some way. 

Your answer made me want to give you a hug. It sucks losing something you enjoyed so much. 

I love all things "spa". It's my jam, and lounging in a pool. Lol