Stacky70 Posted May 17, 2019 Share Posted May 17, 2019 Hi everyone. I’m a newbie 2 dis site & desperately looking 4 advice 🙈 so my partner and I both 29 r together 5 years. We have 2 children. For the pregnancy of our first child & for 7 months after I was alone as he is from a different country & wit visa restrictions & paperwork it took sumtime 2 all work out & 4 us 2 all b together. Fast forward 3 years & we have had another child. Over the last while (year and a half mayb) there has been many occasions where I have felt he hasn’t put us first & made me feel lik I’m not a priority in his life. There has also been occasions were he has gone out & not come home until early hours of d morning (one particular time he stayed out till almost 12 d next day & no contact & sed he left his fone in a taxi). He has told many white lies. I found condoms on 2 occasions in his pockets after nights out day weren’t used but we don’t use dem so............... I have sed 2 him many times dat he has made me feel lik he’s shamed of me r sumting as he has gone 2 tings & not asked me 2 come wit him. I found him taking stuff 2 assist his gym training 2 which I told him if I found dem again den I was gone from him & he promised TWICE he would stop & low & behold I finding dem AGAIN. There has also been various tings & behaviours of his over d last while dat I haven’t agreed wit but I saw past because I new even if I sed dem 2 him he wud bluff dem off r jus walk off as if im d problem & oh it’s jus me “nagging”. 3 weeks ago we had a big chat where I told him I don’t feel d love from him & don’t feel lik a priority r dat he doesn’t put me first & I asked did he take any responsibility 4 making me feel dat way & he sed “u make urself feel lik that”. Last nite he told me there was a work night out on Saturday as 1 of d team r leaving & I sed 2 him if der was any money spare wud he not rather spend it on us instead of a dinner 4 d person who’s leaving as money has been so tight d last few weeks & we haven’t been able 2 do anyting as we hav been broke & he jus shook his head & got up off d couch & sed “I’m going 2 bed”. All in all I jus feel like going forward these r behaviours & attitudes of his I’m going 2 have 2 put up wit if I stay wit him as he is so stubborn & wont change his ways as he thinks he’s rite & tings shud b done d way he thinks instead of him saying “I’m in a relationship so I need 2 do everything 50/50 & compromise”. My fear is that if I keep going another few years his behaviours & attitudes will stay d same & we wil part ways anyway but that I will say 2 myself “why didn’t I finish it sooner”. I jus feel lik taking everything into consideration I wud b happier on my own wit d kids because I wouldn’t have 2 b feeling lik “I just have 2 put up wit anything” & he cud b doing wat he wants, I jus wudnt have 2 b dealing wit him only wen he’d b taking d kids. What do ye think I shud do.?? Any advice wud b greatly appreciated ❤️ Link to comment
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