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Suicidal after getting fired from my job of 11 years


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Hi so I got fired from my job of 11 years because I said a joke to an assistant supervisor via IM that he did not want to ever help me because I was colored, well nevertheless a joke that I meant no harm got me terminated once he reported me to h.r. I was a top performer there and I liked my job. For someone with no degree I was making pretty decent money. Now I have to cope with the fact that I'll be working somewhere extremely far away with less pay and I probably wont enjoy it. I haven't been able to sleep, eat or think positive through this situation. I just want to end my life because I'm afraid that if I don't find a job soon that will pay me enough , that I will lose my apartment and end up homeless which is a huge fear of mine. I just want to end it all. I can't go on

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Don't end your life. Seek professional help!

 

Start over smarter even if you have to get a roommate in order to make ends meet.

 

I'm sorry about your harsh lessons learned. We all learn the hard way regardless of what lessons in life. You will learn to be careful and more cautious for the rest of your life.

 

You will survive. Be strong.

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I understand how you’re feeling right now but please know that there is always something out there that will be better for you. It may not feel that way right now...

Reach out to your friends, family, take this free time to better yourself, get a degree, get a new job. Easier said than done but can definitely be done.

I feel like the consequence of the “joke” is a bit much though I do know a lot of companies take jokes like that seriously. It will take time to feel better again about what happened but you’ll get there.

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How bad was the "joke" that they would fire you after having a very good career there with them for 11 years? Is there any chance you can fight the termination in court? How about you concentrate on working to get yourself re-instated and see if that's even possible. Call a labor lawyer and see if anything can be done. If this was your first offence and your "joke" wasn't a threat of some kind surely you can fight the termination. No?

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How bad was the "joke" that they would fire you after having a very good career there with them for 11 years? Is there any chance you can fight the termination in court? How about you concentrate on working to get yourself re-instated and see if that's even possible. Call a labor lawyer and see if anything can be done. If this was your first offence and your "joke" wasn't a threat of some kind surely you can fight the termination. No?

 

I agree with this...

 

Also who still uses 'colored' to describe themselves? This isnt 1950 and because its not 1950 telling a supervisor you feel you're being racially discriminated against does not give them the right to fire you. Just because its in joke form doesn't mean you don't have a right to voice your feelings/concerns

 

What was your joke?

 

None of this is adding up but thats neither here nor there.

 

Please contact the suicide hotline. You are going to be ok, I personally would seek legal counsel, them firing you over this just doesnt add up

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It sounds like they pre-emptively fired you to avoid a possible claim/lawsuit being filed against them (by you) for racial discrimination in the workplace.

 

Unless there was more to the firing, this is very very wrong.

 

There are labor laws in place that protect employees from this type of tning.

 

Talk to an employment lawyer, find out what your rights are.

 

Typically lawyers will handle on contingency (no cost to you, their fee comes from the settlement or award, typically 35%).

 

Getting fired can be traumatic, you need all the strength you can muster to both fight the termination and look for a new job.

 

In the meantime, seek help for your suicidal feelings, please!

 

There is help out there.

 

You'll get through this!

 

Hope you feel better soon.

 

((Hugs))

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Thank you Katrina1980 I have spoken to lawyers bu no one wants to take the case, they keep telling me they dont handle these types of cases and I made sure they are lawyers who deal with employment discrimination etc.

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Please go to a doctor for a checkup and a referral to a therapist to treat the depression.

04-23-2016:

 

all I can do is cry!

I am so bummed,

one again I'm back to depression, but even greater now.

I'm so depressed & in deep despair!

I'm just lonely & weeping ...

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Sorry OP but racial discrimination is not taken lightly in businesses current day.

But likewise neither is throwing the racial discrimination card.

 

You have provided no evidence that they discriminated against you , yet you have shown evidence that you have accused them of doing so.

 

If you haven’t progressed in the company , it’s not just because of your colour. You believe it to be so , (and tried to make it sound like a joke) yet no lawyer will take your case.

That’s because no lawyer wants to take on a clear cut losing battle.

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Billie28

Wrong!! I have progressed in that company I was a top performer which I stated in the post. I was asked to go to Texas to help train new employees. So basically I'm now being punished because I brought up race even in joking manner? Whatever... I'm on here for advice because I'm feeling at my lowest not to be told that i played the race card nice try though

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Billie28

Wrong!! I have progressed in that company I was a top performer which I stated in the post. I was asked to go to Texas to help train new employees. So basically I'm now being punished because I brought up race even in joking manner? Whatever... I'm on here for advice because I'm feeling at my lowest not to be told that i played the race card nice try though

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Billie28

Wrong!! I have progressed in that company I was a top performer which I stated in the post. I was asked to go to Texas to help train new employees. So basically I'm now being punished because I brought up race even in joking manner? Whatever... I'm on here for advice because I'm feeling at my lowest not to be told that i played the race card nice try though

 

As a “top performer” why did you message a supervisor suggesting he doesn’t help you because you are coloured?

Joke or no joke?

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Tab, joke aside, IF you believed you were being racially discriminated against, the proper protocol would be to go to HR or senior manager, with evidence as to why you believe that.

 

Does not help you now, unfortunately, damage done, but explains why an attorney won't take the case. Maybe even why they terminated you.

 

Because fact is, an employer cannot fire an employee for making a proper claim for racial discrimination. There are labor laws in place protecting employees from that.

 

But the joke thing, I'd have to know what you said exactly, what the joke was and the conversation between you and your supervisor that led to the joke

 

You can still file a claim though with the DFEH (Department of Fair Employment and Housing) which is actually the first step before filing a lawsuit.

 

They will investigate.

 

But back to now. Have you spoken with a doctor about your suicidal feelings? Are you sleeping? Eating?

 

You may need medication temporarily just to get you through the initial funk and transition.

 

I've gone through periods like this at various times in my life, and as I said there is help out there!

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That's the problem I'm sleeping all day and eating horribly. I'm having panic attacks worrying about what I'm going to do next and how im going to pay rent/bills

 

I get that and I'm sorry.

 

I hope this does not come across as too harsh, but what are you going to do about it?

 

Continue to sleep all day or seek help?

 

I KNOW how hard it is, been there myself.

 

But I've learned wallowing in my own pain and suffering only exacerbates the depression, and actually prevents me from taking steps to help myself and get better.

 

It takes a lot of strength! But if you have the energy and strength to reach out/post here, then you have the strength to reach out to doctor, suicide hot line, or even just go for a walk in the sunshine, which will make you feel better too.

 

 

But you can do it, I know you can!

 

If I could do it, anyone can!

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Yes I have reached out to a suicide prevention line. I have been applying for jobs and have interviews etc. Starting from scratch is going to be so hard and I'm scared I will fail, i think it's the fear of the unknown that drives me crazy

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Yes I have reached out to a suicide prevention line. I have been applying for jobs and have interviews etc. Starting from scratch is going to be so hard and I'm scared I will fail, i think it's the fear of the unknown that drives me crazy

 

Usually moving to a new job is a quick way to actually get a pay increase. Use this as a positive. Try to do something you've always wanted to do.

 

In the end, it's just a job. I'd hope you have already filed for unemployment. Take the first thing that comes up as a source of income, and then go from there.

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Consider applying at temp agencies, one per morning, at least 3 per week. The goal is to get placed as a temp inside local companies where you can apply from within for better jobs. This is how most companies 'try before they buy' new people. It prevents them from discovering a bad match in terms of soft skills or work ethic after they have signed a person permanently.

 

The agencies don't all place with the same firms, and don't be discouraged when they tell you they have nothing at the moment--good agencies don't have jobs lying around. They place people immediately from their active rosters, and the only way to get onto that roster is to make an appointment (not by sending a resume) to interview and test on any computer apps you claim you can use. If your scores are lousy you'll be invited to use their tutorials to learn more and retest to raise your scores.

 

Once inside companies in any capacity (the role doesn't matter) you can build relationships and apply for jobs that are not published to the public.

 

My heart goes out to you, and I hope you will trust the process and land something that will make all of this worth the scare. Reward yourself with something relaxing or easy after each interview. Make it a goal to surprise everyone, including ourself, with your resilience and ability to bounce back from this for a better outcome than you can envision at the moment.

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