tabbycat7 Posted April 15, 2019 Share Posted April 15, 2019 I’ve been in a relationship with someone who was a close friend for nearly 4 months. It sounds short but this is my first relationship as i’ve never been willing to trust/commit to anyone. I’ve been having doubts about whether I really love him or not for a while now and I don’t know whether to break up with him or not, however I don’t want to lose him as he is such a wonderful person. I’m also currently going through the loss of my father and don’t know if I can face another loss, but equally I don’t know if I should still entertain something I’m not 100% into. Please help if anyone’s had similar experiences :( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maew Posted April 15, 2019 Share Posted April 15, 2019 The question is... is it your own fear of trust and commitment that is getting in the way of you letting go and allowing yourself to love this person or are there legitimate reasons for the doubts you are having? Ending a relationship can be painful, but it doesn't have to be the end of the world if you do it in a kind and compassionate way. If you truly have reason to believe this isn't the guy for you, it's better to end it now before you are too far in vs. waiting until you have more history together. If it's you... as in you are afraid to let go... I suggest exploring why that is and taking some steps towards positive change... because as the saying goes "wherever you go, there you are." the problem will just follow you into the next one if you don't do anything about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zenon1267 Posted April 16, 2019 Share Posted April 16, 2019 Relationships especially in the beginning need to be about having fun and enjoying the shared time between the two involved. Love doesn’t have to be involved in it especially since it’s only month 4. Respect and loyalty is more important. Try to focus on dating him more and communicate how you feel. If you don’t respect him then that’s way more serious than not loving him. Open a line of communication with him. Try to have fun more and go out more together. You are in a state of loss atm you need to understand that your thinking isn’t clear. If you feel you need to take a break from your bf because of it then it’s your right. Be aware you may lose him and that connection if you do. In my opinion if you really want to be with someone you will. The loss of your father shouldn’t complicate that. What you feel is because you aren’t really into him. He needs to step up as a man in my opinion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gary Snyder Posted April 16, 2019 Share Posted April 16, 2019 It's normal for people to have doubts about their relationship for the first 18 months. I'm sure things will turn out the way they were meant to be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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