Little sister.

[Ciara2015]

Then she gets her school uniform wet which is why I like it zipped. I've even tried rewarding her when she does it but that doesn't even work.

[mustlovedogs]

Then she gets her school uniform wet which is why I like it zipped. I've even tried rewarding her when she does it but that doesn't even work.

 

You’re babying her.

 

That’s why she wants you to do it.

 

Let her grow up and stop helicoptering.

[Seraphim]

If her uniform gets wet it does. Oh well. When she is wet she will do her coat up. Never do for a child what they can do for them selves .

[Ciara2015]

I understand that Seraphim but I just find it easier than having to listen to her moaning that she wants me to do it.

[Seraphim]

I understand that Seraphim but I just find it easier than having to listen to her moaning that she wants me to do it.

Then you will be doing things for her forever . The purpose of parenting is to create independent beings not caving in to whining.

[HeartGoesOn]

Who appointed you to be her guardian? As far as I know that has to be ordered through the courts.

[Seraphim]

Who appointed you to be her guardian? As far as I know that has to be ordered by the court.

Exactly. When you move out on your own it is up to the court not you whether you take her or not .

[Annia]

If your aunt and uncle are the official guardians appointed by court (I doubt you, a minor, are the official guardian), you can't just pick up your sister to live with you and your boyfriend. She has to live with your aunt and uncle and them as official guardians have to figure out how to take care of her and taking her to school and picking her up. Also, if you want to live with your boyfriend, I'd wait until you're at least 18 (I doubt your aunt and uncle who are also your official guardians would let you move in with an adult before you turn 18) and get a job so you can support yourself and don't live dependent on your boyfriend. Also, supposing that the courts let you become the official guardian when you become an adult, you and your boyfriend would have to gain enough income to support her. It's not that simple as just moving into his house with her and that's it.

 

Focus on school and your future and don't move in with anyone before you're a financially independent adult. As to your sister be firm her. If she doesn't zip up the jacket, let her suffer the consequences (cold and rain) by herself and she'll learn.

[RayofLighten]

Why are you making such a big deal over a jacket zip? It's a kid thing. They don't like to do them up but they will learn eventually when they don't like getting too cold. Chill and let her get on with things in her own way. Now, as for the rest of your unrealistic claims, you are still classed a minor at your age so you wouldn't be made a legal guardian and any court would place you with someone who would be there to take care of you regularly. As for your 'boyfriend', no protecting adult and guardian would ever let a minor get involved with a adult. It's 100% illegal (regardless of not having done anything physical). He could get arrested if found out.

 

I 100% call BS on this post.

[Wiseman2]

Ok, learn not to sweat the small stuff, overprotect or create a power struggle. If she gets cold, she'll zip up. No worries. The bigger issue is being in high school and waiting around for this 20 y/o guy to buy a house and move in with him. Since your aunt and uncle have supervision and legal/financial responsibilities for your sister, hopefully they will continue to raise her in an appropriate environment and overrule any ideas about taking her with you to live with your bf.

At the moment, we are living with our auntie and uncle but they work 8am until 4pm hence why I am taking her to school and picking her up after school.

 

I am currently in a relationship with a 20yr old so I am waiting for him to buy a house to rent so that I can move in with him.

[RayofLighten]

Ok, learn not to sweat the small stuff, overprotect or create a power struggle. If she gets cold, she'll zip up. No worries. The bigger issue is being in high school and waiting around for this 20 y/o guy to buy a house and move in with him. Since your aunt and uncle have supervision and legal/financial responsibilities for your sister, hopefully they will continue to raise her in an appropriate environment and overrule any ideas about taking her with you to live with your bf.

 

This bf is an adult, she is a minor. It is highly illegal.

[Seraphim]

The age of consent in the UK is 16. Doesn’t mean she should be with a 20 year old but it is not illegal in Scotland. Country makes a difference.

[SarahLancaster]

We are being played.

 

So, your bf is a pedophile and your relatives are cool with this?

 

I agree that we are being played.

[Batya33]

If it's a matter of safety -meaning zipped so she doesn't sit in a wet uniform all day -then do it and explain to her it's for safety reasons. And positively reinforce when she does things for herself. Yes, I do far too much for my son - work in progress on my part! - but in safety situations like applying sunscreen or avoiding being soaked if possible, then yes I would do it, while explaining. Or you can send her a change of clothing and make her do it -so then she has to change into her dry uniform.

[Hollyj]

The age of consent in the UK is 16. Doesn’t mean she should be with a 20 year old but it is not illegal in Scotland. Country makes a difference.

 

She was 14/15 when they started dating.

[Rose Mosse]

She sounds like a kid. I was definitely suspect of the situation there but it seems like she doesn't understand the legal terms she just used or the weight of them(ie guardian). She's not arguing like a troll either. I'm worried about the 20 year old also.

 

Look, OP, I understand you're worried about your lil sis. I would be too if our parents were out of the picture. If she doesn't want to zip her jacket, she doesn't have to zip it. You've taught her the ropes (ie looking outside the window and checking and the mechanism of what a zipper does). The rest is up to her. Just like your life will be up to you too. If your parents were around how do you think they would feel about your older boyfriend? Be careful when dating and don't get caught up with the wrong crowd. Once you move out with this 20 year old boyfriend, you'll be stuck with him and if the relationship doesn't work out, you'll be on the hook for supporting yourself alone or having to move back with your uncle and aunty. Your best bet may be doing well in school and going to college. Be careful in your next few years. I hope it works out for you and you make good choices.

[Seraphim]

I am not saying it is right. But right now she is 16 and it is not illegal in the UK as long as the partner is not in a position of power and not more than 5 years older.

 

In Canada in the age of consent was 14 until 2008, when it was subsequently changed to 16.

 

What I am addressing is different countries have different laws. Not everything runs the way it does in the US.

 

Do I think she should be with a 20 year old? Nope. But it is not illegal.

She was 14/15 when they started dating.

[tattoobunnie]

I have a seven year old boy, and at this age, if they want to zip up or their coat or not, they will. Her uniform may get wet, but she will just have to learn to zip up. Either that, get a hoodie pullover, so no zipper.