GINAKK Posted April 3, 2019 Share Posted April 3, 2019 I hope you can share your thoughts on this. I am with my partner for 5 months now so still rather fresh. I am 41 and he is 50. I only met one his male friend and he didn't meet any of mine. Few months ago he mentioned he has quite a few female friends. One of them lives 2,5 hours away. Apparently they worked together years ago and now she is retired. She is 60 years old and recovers from a very serious illness. Fast forward- a couple of weeks ago, he said that he is worried about her as she never asks for help, she is always "fine". He said he would like to find out himself if this is the case. I thought that was a good idea and the right thing to do. However, he added" anytime I visit her, I stay overnight as the trip back and forth is tiring. How would you feel about it? Think about it". Really? We travel to work an hour and it is not an issue.... I am not feeling comfortable with the fact that he would like to sleep at her house. However he was so honest about it and I don't want to punish him for being real with me. He trusted me I will respond in a mature way....but I cant help it that I find this disturbing. I said " we thought about going away for a weekend -how about we go there and stay at the hotel and you can visit your friend ?" He was puzzled but said "not a bad idea" but I see this is now as maybe a controlling behaviour....I don't want him to think he is going there with a police officer. What is the best way to respond to it ? to deal with it ? I don't know this woman....and he didn't mention he would like me to meet her. Also , makes me wonder -why would he stay there overnight ....if she is recovering from this illness, she will probably be tired rather promptly and I think its even not fair for him to stay there and make her being a host ....prepare him food and entertain him etc. Am I being wrong here? Link to comment
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