KootenayBoy Posted March 15, 2019 Share Posted March 15, 2019 Teacher holding a class meeting about a single student in his absence. Im struggling with this and was hoping to get some other parents opinions, First off Im honest and not a my kid is perfect kinda dad so what Im saying is as close to a objective view as I consider possible. Ive been having some issues with my sons middle school its not the regular type canadian school its a newish offshoot that follows slightly different guidelines and beliefs its credo in part is to encourage self esteem and self confidence. Mostly alternative type families art therapy, express your feelings alternative types some have also said a lot of helicopter parents but I try not to judge so Im not really sure. My son went from homeschooled all his life into the Wildflower program because I thought it would be an easier transition than just dropping him straight into public middle school and while our beliefs line up in many ways it turns out in at least one area it may be considered by others as a form of satanism, and that is my sons into boxing he competes and is really good (not just a dad bragging lol) as the year has gone along its seeming to me that he gets singled out a lot and whle he has some issues my boy is far from a bad kid at first I thought it was just adjusting to the school and was always on him explaining rules and how he should act I was only looking at it from a school standpoint not actually believing that maybe they are actually singling him out as no where and I mean No where in any other area of his life be it cadets or boxing class SPCA clubs, home, hanging at friends does he get in the type of trouble he has at school no one speaks ill of him (save one aunt who just needs her kids to be better than everyone etc) Ok so now the problem: He got suspended and I was not at all happy I laid into him over it and it was during this that a mental shift happens within me and I started to put the puzzle together and a very different picture emerged than the one I had in my mind before hand. He got suspended because another boy grabbed him and pushed him up against a wall by his shirt, possible over a keep away game, which while maybe ill advised is not a reason to assault someone the end result was my son hauled off the the principals office and the next morning about 30 minutes before the start of school over the phone told not to come in. Ok suspended not good but not the end of the world we can learn and change behaviour, the next day he stayed home as well as Id assumed he would not be suspended one day then go back then off for the weekend, it was not until after school started I was called and told he was to be there but by then it was too late the day before was so hard emotionally on him he couldn't sleep and it would have been hell to get him off to school. NOW here's the root of my issue: During this day off his teacher held a meeting with his classmates who was in attendance is a conflicting story the teacher in a one sentence email stated it was "his friends" while the friends who told my son later in the day say it was the whole class. Anyway they held this meeting to discuss my son while he was not there, and as it was relayed to my boy through his friends they discussed among other things hes "anger issues" and "fighting everyone" these two points were not made by everyone but mostly one or two boys who he does not get along with. Now my sons not a bully its the opposite nor is he a brawler in fact as part of his contract to be on the team its an immediate removal from the team and gym etc and because its his passion its something he does not want to loose he is the kind of kid who if he thinks someone is missing out on something he will give them his, if your cold he gives you his jacket if someone is being mistreated he steps in, Ive seen him in home mode around his family as well as how he acts when he thinks no parents or such are around Ive listened to him talk with friends when he thinks its just them Im aware of the difference and while I dont like how he acts at these times I KNOW he is not a bad kid because even at these times he is still holding to his core beliefs just with more profanity and the odd rude joke. not a bully or brawler. So these comments b the other boy are not who my son is, but from a standpoint of people who consider boxing as a angry or blood sport I can see how they may paint anyone involved in it with that brush. so is it considered normal to hold meetings about children who are not present in middle school and discuss them? to me it seems like a huge betrayal and it would not matter if the intentions were good the subject of that meeting would feel ostracized and singled out. Its hard enough being 13 without having everyone sit around and talk about you behind your back led by a teacher you liked and trusted. It makes me angry because I see how much it hurt him and how he went from a blank slate school wise getting up super early and loving school to never ever wanting to go back. Ive never heard of such a thing but maybe its normal and Im just out of touch with the new way of doing things. In my day at school Id have been mortified if this happened I mean it was bad enough having it happen in different circles let alone the entire class led by a teacher, compounded by what you consider an unjust suspension. Id love to hear opinions.. Link to comment
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.