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Getting my ex back after break up?!


Oxj04
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So here’s the deal. I’m 30, me and my girlfriend we’re together for just over a year. Fully in love with eacother! 6 months ago something happened where a nasty woman Messaged my girlfriend saying that I slept with her (I hadn’t) now I totally understand why my girlfriend would freak out. Any way, we sorted that issue, however, since then she did not trust me. Every little thing I did would cause that subject to be brought back up! 3 weeks ago she ended things with me as she did not trust me! She’s blocked my number saying she had to get over me. She has not blocked me on face book?! But only left 1 photo of us up on there! I have gone no contact for 2 weeks now and it’s been hard. From a girls point of view, will she eventually contact me? Or how do I go about contacting her via face book?

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She probably will decide to contact you again at some point, however until then, respect her space and let her have the time she needs to process her feelings.

 

On a totally different note, why would some random woman message your GF to say you had slept together? What sort of history do you have with this person?

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Long story short, I met up with a few friends I hadn’t seen for a while. We got chatting to a bunch of girls (no intention to do anything with these girls) we went back to their hotel to keep drinking. I fell asleep and woke up in a panic. (Nothing happened) This girl new my name and searche for me on Facebook. Then the message was sent to my girl friend. I don’t know if she did it out of spite as I turned her down or she thought things were going to happen. I should not have been in that hotel I know but there was no intention other than just keep drinking.

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Well, I can understand why she had a hard time trusting you after that. You put yourself in a position of a single man when you were in a relationship which told her that you have very poor romantic relationship boundaries and don't know enough to keep yourself out of trouble with women who could very well end up being cray-cray.

 

You're not ready to be in a relationship of seriousness it would appear. Just leave this girl alone so the two of you can move on. Hopefully you've learned a lesson and will be more dating savvy in the future.

 

Do not contact her via facebook. Instead just delete yourself from her friends list. Take the steps to put all this is in past so you can find the woman who was meant to be your lifemate.

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Yes my lesson was learned. And that’s why we got back together at the time. Believe me I haven’t done such a thing since! 6 months down the line she would get the trust issues out again which I totally understand! She was a great friend to my daughter too! Which makes it 10 x bloody worse

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Yes my lesson was learned. And that’s why we got back together at the time. Believe me I haven’t done such a thing since! 6 months down the line she would get the trust issues out again which I totally understand! She was a great friend to my daughter too! Which makes it 10 x bloody worse

When trust is lost in a relationship then the two people involved don't have much of a chance of regaining that trust unless the two of you get the couples counselling you need to learn about boundaries, and how to regain the trust through actions.

 

How soon after meeting her did you introduce her to your daughter?

 

In future, it would be in your daughters best interest to keep her out of your love life until you know for sure that your relationship with the woman is going to last. You only dated this woman for a year so I'm going to assume that you introduced her to your daughter pre-maturely and now not only are you grieving the end of the relationship but so is your little girl.

 

All lessons learned so you will be a good partner for the woman you are going to spend the rest of your life with.

 

Good luck going forth.

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1. Your gf isn't coing back. When females break-up - it's usually for good. It takes them a long time before they finally decide to break up so once they do - it's over.

2. Who knows about the hotel girl but she's obviously a bad apple so do not pursue anythign with her.

3. It doesn't matter if hotel girl messaged your ex-gf (not sure why she was mad or sent hate mail to her - you're not even her bf anymore).

 

Move on.

Make better decisions and choices.

Raise the standard on who you decide to get serious about- hopefully more mentally stable and reasonable people.

Don't worry about whether your ex- accused you of cheating. You know you didn't. You don't have to prove anything to her. She will believe what she will believe for the reasons she believes them. That's not your concern and you can't change it - don't waste energy on it or her.

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Ok, all you can do is go no contact not only for her to process and for you to reflect. While this woman who contacted your gf is a bit unhinged, your gf was certainly not thrilled about "drinking and staying in a hotel room" with other women.

 

Particularly that she heard it from a stranger who could easily verify the date, time, place, your name, your friends, etc which ironically made this woman more credible than you, since you of course never mentioned this incident to your gf, hoping it would blow over undetected..

 

So unfortunately it makes the unhinged party girl appear more honest and trustworthy than you, thus your gf chose to believe her that you got drunk, went to her hotel room and slept there.. Maybe your gf doesn't know or care whether you 'technically' cheated. Being drunk overnight in some woman's hotel room may have been enough in itself for her to distrust you to call it quits

We got chatting to a bunch of girls. we went back to their hotel to keep drinking. I fell asleep and woke up in a panic.

 

This girl new my name and searche for me on Facebook. Then the message was sent to my girl friend.

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