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Roasting The Breakup 'EXperts'*


Carus
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Hi All,

 

A guy on Youtube who goes by the name Dating Guy has started a small series of Roast videos looking at the so called gurus who promote their Get Your Ex back programs. I'll post the links below....

 

These are pretty hilarious and can bring some brevity in a devastating time.

 

But I also think they're quite important as in times of desperation we can shell out hundreds of hard earned $$ on these programs which have little to no chance of actually working out, and can be quite detrimental to actually healing and getting your life back on track.

 

Brad Browning ~

 

Matthew Hussey ~

 

Love Advice TV, Dan Bacon, Chris Camwell, Clay Andrews & Michael Griswold ~ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aUvbVYJNg1c

 

Michael Fiore Text your Ex Back ~

 

*Caveat: This guy swears a bit, so if you have a real aversion to swearing then please don't watch these vids....*

 

Other than that, enjoy and hope these bring a smile to your face, even if for a moment*

 

Lastly, if anyone has bought any of these programs, I think it would be educational and helpful to know if:

 

1) Which program(s) did you buy?

2) What were your results?

 

Carus*

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The first time my marriage hit the skids, I was DESPERATE to find a solution. I don’t remember what i spent, deffinetely money I didn’t have on one of those online pdf, pretty much all it said was go NC and make sure I look pretty *gag* I went NC and like clockwork he came sniffing around a few weeks later. I was like wow the book was right. The last and final time , I went NC but it wasn’t to get him back it was for my own sanity and because I was done. Took him months to come sniffing around but he eventually did, clearly were now divorced, but NC does seem to work to get back someone you have no business being with in the first place lol.

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Thanks for sharing FigureItOut* ~ I've certainly spent enough of my own $$ on certain programs, and clearly I'm still single whilst she moved on long ago :-/

 

Have a look at those vids if you don't mind a bit of swearing...they're well made and certainly pretty funny :)

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Granted I like my advice with a little bit of nuance but that doesn't tend to lend itself to generalized dating / breakup advice, so I'll present this clip that delivers as much for free and in about 90 seconds as you could expect from a $47 eBook allegedly written by one of these guys who, as FIO points out, essentially just milk the tried and near universally true NC rule.

 

[video=youtube;tu-QjTNtDz8]

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I’ve been following The Dating Guy - mainly due to over exposure of other “experts” videos. It was a YouTube recommendation.

 

It’s a refreshing outlook on the more well known channels. The humour is likeable but more so the commentary does make sense. When he re-reads the “advice” of others, it does sound completely irrational. The “break NC with a memory of a walk through a park” had me in stitches. He’s also honest when he says some of the advice is actually worthwhile.

 

The experts are ultimately prying on the desperation we all feel when we try to get an ex back. “How much is it worth to you to get them back?” is the usual tag line. If it gives some form of comfort, it maybe worth it. I can’t imagine there is much variety between generic PDFs. But a lot of advice, the dating guy included, is free and easily relatable.

 

What I’ve found scouring videos is one constant - NC post break up. The time frame varies (30/45/60/Never) - tbh I don’t feel like there’s a specific time. Im leaning towards the latter right now - but the desire to reach out is real.

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Thanks for your comments Askltk*

The “break NC with a memory of a walk through a park” had me in stitches. He’s also honest when he says some of the advice is actually worthwhile.

That is one thing I liked about these videos...It's nice to actually smile or even laugh when times are tough :)

 

The Matthew Hussey one where he's going on about 'That's Amazing!...' just floored me :))

What I’ve found scouring videos is one constant - NC post break up. The time frame varies (30/45/60/Never) - tbh I don’t feel like there’s a specific time. Im leaning towards the latter right now - but the desire to reach out is real.

I've been 'working' in the 'Breakup Field' for around 9 years now.....

 

The stories of reaching out to an ex and getting further rejected outweigh any success stories 10,000 to 1.....As in, I've hardly ever seen it work....

 

I do have a friend who has done it, but that relationship is totally dysfunctional and they've been getting back together and then breaking up again every 2-3 weeks for about 4 years now! I kid you not.....

 

NC is extremely difficult and 99% of people break it more than once (and learn the hard way). But every day you push through it you are building strength....

 

And to forge steel, one must apply fire*

 

Carus*

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Hi Carus,

 

How you doing sir? It's been while since I posted...

 

Your post caught my eye because I actually tried this before and even though it did kinda work my trust was gone for a cheater there is no way I could go back to her after what she done to us...

 

Dan bacon was the one I still listen too now and then but not for ex back advice but more for dating and relationship tips (how to get back into the game).

 

Going on my 2nd date this Sunday, its more casual than something serious.....

 

Still feel hurt and betrayed deep down and since this is my 2nd year as well without her it starting to hurt even more, but as my friend said (the one I'm going out with) it's time to let go and focus on the future maybe we will get back together who knows but right now that won't happen as my daughter is my main focus, raising her to become a strong independent woman....

 

Another thing, a good friend told me since my ex wife is with an older man this can be due to father issues which is true, her father left them at a young age and it looks like she replaced me with a "daddy"....

Edited by Bigboss29
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Hey BB* ~ Nice to hear from you*

How you doing sir? It's been while since I posted...

Eh. Pushing on.....Some days are still pretty brutal but some days not so brutal....She is still sitting there in the background of my thoughts. Soon to be gone surely!

Your post caught my eye because I actually tried this before....

Could you share which system you tried and how it went?

Dan bacon was the one I still listen too now and then but not for ex back advice but more for dating and relationship tips (how to get back into the game).

lol...If I tried any of DB's stuff on my ex she would run away laughing. I find he's a bit like a 15 year old trying to be some kind of PUA...

Going on my 2nd date this Sunday, its more casual than something serious.....

Cool mate. Have some fun. Hope it goes well....

 

My CPTSD and lingering love for my exwife is still holding me back a bit from dating, but I'm sure one day I'll meet someone else. I'm certainly open to that. Despite the incredible and prolonged pain I've felt over this I don't want to close down completely :)

Still feel hurt and betrayed deep down and since this is my 2nd year as well without her it starting to hurt even more....

Yeh, it sux that in some cases (mine included) it seems to get worse as time goes on.....

 

I was ok for the first few months due to that false hope and bread crumbing I guess. But as it became more and more obvious she wasn't coming back, the denial fell away and the absolute grief and pain set in. Do you relate to that....?

 

I'm 15 months out from the actual D-Day now and boy ain't that frustrating...!

 

Still, I'm grateful that every thing else in my life is going along ok. I definitely hold onto that. This has really become quite a 'spiritual' experience I must say!

....my daughter is my main focus, raising her to become a strong independent woman....

Says a lot about BB* ~ Good on you.

Another thing, a good friend told me since my ex wife is with an older man this can be due to father issues which is true, her father left them at a young age and it looks like she replaced me with a "daddy"....

This could be true. My exwife had the same thing happen. She even has two half siblings from her fathers side yet she has NO interest in associating with them, which says to me there's still some deep core wounding going on there.

 

However, if this is true about your ex, similar to mine, the 'daddy issues' are what also makes it difficult for them to maintain a close and loving relationship....

 

My ex is on her 4th since me now in 12 months.....

 

Time will tell. We just gotta focus on our own paths forward*

 

Carus*

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Hey man,

 

Haven't tried a specific system, I just read or watch whatever tips he has, like his flow and confidence lol.

 

I was in the same boat with the bread crumbing, like when she was pregnant, she would message me for meaningless thing giving me false hope etc, I'm surprised they not married yet.... well life is full of surprises lol..... and yes the daddy issues seem to present in her relationship...

 

My ex wife seems to be doing most of the work of that "relationship" so yeah pity really hope the man she left me for is all that...

 

Take it easy with the dating, I'm putting myself out of my comfort zone as I'm tired of missing out on life, I'm in my early 30's so i will start acting like bachelor, living the life, and now that i have free time I can do that exactly, just need to up my game with women...

 

Scared to fall for any women right now, so I'm taking my time building up finances and confidence...

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Thanks for your comments Askltk*

 

That is one thing I liked about these videos...It's nice to actually smile or even laugh when times are tough :)

 

The Matthew Hussey one where he's going on about 'That's Amazing!...' just floored me :))

 

I've been 'working' in the 'Breakup Field' for around 9 years now.....

 

The stories of reaching out to an ex and getting further rejected outweigh any success stories 10,000 to 1.....As in, I've hardly ever seen it work....

 

I do have a friend who has done it, but that relationship is totally dysfunctional and they've been getting back together and then breaking up again every 2-3 weeks for about 4 years now! I kid you not.....

 

NC is extremely difficult and 99% of people break it more than once (and learn the hard way). But every day you push through it you are building strength....

 

And to forge steel, one must apply fire*

 

Carus*

 

The Dating Guy's recent post about Dan Bacon - I may know very little about getting my Ex back (hence why I'm on the forum), but if that video is a snippet into the content that certain "gurus" roll out I'd be highly offended. I think everyone here is looking for an answer / quick fix / formula to getting back with their Ex - and that content prys on all our insecurities / desperation.

 

One thing I also like about that channel is there is an honesty in what he says about mentally feeding your mind with that type of content. The safety net of going on youtube and searching "Ex Back" / "NC EX" / "Ex Miss You" just programmes you mind to focus on these strategies / tips / plans that are easily repeatable and watchable rather than actually getting on with moving on. You keep bring your Ex into you mind and makes the whole process worse. He's said in a number of videos that after a while, you should just stop watching his and other's videos like it because it's counter productive. You know the content (NC / Focus on you etc..) so stop looking for answers. I know I've been guilty of that over that over the last few weeks.

 

His latest video actually recommends getting off youtube over the Holidays. Give your mind a break from chasing you ex (subconsciously) and just enjoy time with friends and family. I'm taking a reprieve from advice channels for now - I'm 36 odd Days NC with no hint of reach out from either direction and know that I'm going to be tempted to break it over the coming days. If I keep watching this type of content, I know I'll find a channel that will give the wrong advice and advise breaking NC and wishing her and her family Merry Christmas is a positive thing to do.

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It's true askltk* ~ If you look hard enough you can can probably find something that will support any theory or feeling that you're having at the time....

 

36 days is not that long so I suspect they'll be thinking of you somewhere on that day....Proceed with caution*

 

I don't think there's any specific science to getting an ex back. Some come back...Most don't....

 

NC just protects you from making things worse and helps you move forward into the healing process....once the initial pain subsides anyway....

 

Instead of sending any messages over the next week, drop a note in here if you like ~ https://www.enotalone.com/forum/showthread.php?t=555751

 

Stay Focused

 

Carus*

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These “experts” use a person’s fear and uncertainty as a weapon against them. People who embrace fear and failure are the ones who are successful in achieving their goals.

 

Ex’s come back when they recognize your spirit cannot be broken; and that no matter what slight may befall you, you embrace the outcome, win or lose.

 

If someone chooses to leave you, allow them.

If you were ever of value to them, they will look for you in every person they meet and eventually return. Until that day, move forward without reservation. The present and future demand an incredible amount of energy and focus, don’t waste a second of it dwelling on the past.

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Not a single one.

 

I’ve found the key to attraction is to simply focus on your own happiness. Like they say, happiness is magnetic, it attracts even when you may not want it too.

 

Energy, focus, and time are only awarded to the worthy. The worthy are only those who embrace all of the above. 👌

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I agree. That's how I've ended up in all my relationships. Sadly though I've really lost my mojo after this last one...I do hope I can get at least half of it back. I'll keep working towards it*

 

Not sure if you actually watched any of the vids in the OP but they really are well done and outright hilarious!

 

Thanks again for posting.

 

Carus*

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  • 1 month later...

Yeah I got into the Ape for a while. He's not bad but I did a small coaching with him and it seemed like he was just throwing me cookie cutter stuff rather than understanding my personal situation....

 

Craig Kenneth had a lot of great videos especially now with Margaret on board, but I did a couple of emails with him and his feedback was not worth the money. Perhaps his Skype sessions are better value if one can afford it....

 

Healing Heart is a great channel too :-)

 

More feedback on this thread would be good to help any newbies in the space. Protect your heart, and your wallet!

 

Carus*

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How were Craig Kenneth's emails like? Not going to use a coach, I have a therapist appointment (I will update you guys on how that goes, in case anybody will benefit from the advice I will be given there), so that will not mash well, haha.

What I wonder though is, has he helped you in any way with your concerns? I like his videos because they help me lessen my recent anxiety and give me good tips on how to improve myself as a person. I wonder if his relationship tips are valid.

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These “experts” use a person’s fear and uncertainty as a weapon against them. People who embrace fear and failure are the ones who are successful in achieving their goals.

 

Ex’s come back when they recognize your spirit cannot be broken; and that no matter what slight may befall you, you embrace the outcome, win or lose.

 

If someone chooses to leave you, allow them.

If you were ever of value to them, they will look for you in every person they meet and eventually return. Until that day, move forward without reservation. The present and future demand an incredible amount of energy and focus, don’t waste a second of it dwelling on the past.

 

Omg so true, well said!

 

Outlaw how is it you only have 32 posts in almost a year?

 

Please post more often, you sound very wise, like you've been through it and learned from experience, which is the best way to learn, imo.

 

Versus some dating "expert" whom you don't know, does not know you and may be taking advantage of vulnerable men, and laughing all the way to the bank..

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How were Craig Kenneth's emails like?

Well they were expensive and his responses were pretty much just one liners. One example is he said "Your job is to reattract her"....If only it were that easy huh?

 

Anyway, that was a long time ago and she never came back so it was irrelevant anyway.

Not going to use a coach, I have a therapist appointment (I will update you guys on how that goes, in case anybody will benefit from the advice I will be given there), so that will not mash well, haha.

Yeh I'd be interested to hear how that goes :)

What I wonder though is, has he helped you in any way with your concerns? I like his videos because they help me lessen my recent anxiety and give me good tips on how to improve myself as a person. I wonder if his relationship tips are valid.

Despite my relationship being over long ago, I do continue to watch his videos. Since he added Margaret to the mix there's been a lot more psychology and personal growth stuff which I find interesting.

 

Carus*

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