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Getting tired of the travel


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Hey everyone,

 

I'm at a crossroads, I'm hoping you all can help me figure out the best decision. I'm going on about 4 years now at my current job. Earlier this year, our parent company chose to close down our location because of budget cuts like many businesses. If we wanted to keep our job, the employees now had to travel about another hour north to work out the main facility. My travel was about 25 miles 30 to 45 minutes one-way before, but now it's alittle more than double that distance and time on the road, ONE-WAY. I'm going on almost 5 months doing this drive now. I wasn't opposed to making the drive at first, because the benefits and pay is ok. Also, I didn't want to jump ship in case something good became of it. The company has been flexible with giving the employees the some ability to work remotely on a day or two. However, I don't think that's enough and some have started to agree, and even quit because of it. I've also been told that it is unlikely that my work would cover my mileage either, which makes sense. I have looked into moving closer to the job, but renting or paying down a house will be too much to afford in that area and personally I don't want to move for a job. I have tried staying in a hotel overnight to try and compensate for the distance, but that cost also adds up and I have to stay a lot of nights to get enough points to get free nights.I don't have a girlfriend or many friends anymore and not much of a social life, which doesn't help atleast balance some of it out.

 

Either way, I have noticed that my work ethic has been starting to drop alittle, which is unlike me and I'm starting to stress out more and are getting more forgetful. I also struggle with a personality that makes it hard for me to let things go after I leave work.

 

I've started thinking that maybe it's about time to start changing jobs to something closer and lessen the distance so the travel and stress doesn't drain me before I even start working. However, I've been unsure lately with the economy and what I have been seeing, that I feel like I'm stuck without years and years experience to apply for another. But, I can't keep going on like this, I'm either going to end up screwing up or getting burned out.

 

Any suggestions or thoughts are appreciated.

 

Thanks.

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Well, companies do bet on more employees leaving in a situation like this. So it's a way of cutting the workforce by another 5% or so. Where you're single with few ties, you really can do anything you want to. So you should figure out what you want to do. You can find someplace to move to if you really want to. You can also polish up your resume and start interviewing at other companies. Or you can suck it up and keep commuting.

 

I think the economy will be good for another two years, but obviously it wasn't good for your company. A lot of companies are hiring so now would be the time to find a job. But a study found that the leading cause of depression is unhappiness at work, so you need to come up with some solution.

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I think you should put your feelers out and start looking at other job options, asap.

 

Putting in the time on job searching and applications is a job on its own, but don’t let it discourage you.

 

Set aside a specific time during the week to do this.

 

Don’t let your fear of thinking you need more experience prevent you from going after what you want, which will only leave you stressed and burned out at your current job.

 

I think you know what you have to do, compwhiz, but you’re letting fear hold you back; as if you’re afraid of what will happen if you do apply for other jobs. You’re over-thinking and over-analyzing this, I think.

 

You can’t think this way. You just have to go for it, if this is what you want to do.

Edited by milly007
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Well, companies do bet on more employees leaving in a situation like this. So it's a way of cutting the workforce by another 5% or so. Where you're single with few ties, you really can do anything you want to. So you should figure out what you want to do. You can find someplace to move to if you really want to. You can also polish up your resume and start interviewing at other companies. Or you can suck it up and keep commuting.

 

I think the economy will be good for another two years, but obviously it wasn't good for your company. A lot of companies are hiring so now would be the time to find a job. But a study found that the leading cause of depression is unhappiness at work, so you need to come up with some solution.

DanZee, I kind of figured the parent company was also trying to reduce the workforce, I mean if they already closed down a location, they're just biding their time seeing how much more money they can save by people quitting or moving on to a different company. I'm not willing to move closer, and it's way too expensive to live in that area as I said before. At this point, I think the commute is getting too much for me to drive, not to mention the wear and tear it's also taking on my vehicle. So, I probably will start looking at my resume.
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I think you should put your feelers out and start looking at other job options, asap.

 

Putting in the time on job searching and applications is a job on its own, but don’t let it discourage you.

 

Set aside a specific time during the week to do this.

 

Don’t let your fear of thinking you need more experience prevent you from going after what you want, which will only leave you stressed and burned out at your current job.

 

I think you know what you have to do, compwhiz, but you’re letting fear hold you back; as if you’re afraid of what will happen if you do apply for other jobs. You’re over-thinking and over-analyzing this, I think.

 

You can’t think this way. You just have to go for it, if this is what you want to do.

Thanks milly007, I think I will start looking elsewhere.

 

In your opinion, do you think four hours round trip on top of working in an office setting, is too much? I know some people that work in the city think this is normal.

 

Job searching is a job in itself and lengthy between interviewing. However, I'm not sure that I still have the skills to pursue a job at a different company. It's not that I don't think I can do it, but rather that I won't remember the other things I learned in college that a new company would require of me.

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Thanks milly007, I think I will start looking elsewhere.

 

In your opinion, do you think four hours round trip on top of working in an office setting, is too much? I know some people that work in the city think this is normal.

 

Job searching is a job in itself and lengthy between interviewing. However, I'm not sure that I still have the skills to pursue a job at a different company. It's not that I don't think I can do it, but rather that I won't remember the other things I learned in college that a new company would require of me.

 

I did know of a few people who lived on the outskirts of the city where I currently live and commuted into the city or another nearby city and spent 1.5 hours to 2 hours (each way) every day commuting to and from work, but they were doing this until they found a job with a less time consuming commute. So yes, the time you spend travelling sounds about right, but the question is, do you want to do this? Clearly not. Definitely not ideal and quite frankly, I don't know how anyone could do this each and every day. Work alone can be tiring enough.

 

When you think about it, you're spending about another half work day in your car every day (in addition to a full day's work), or the equivalent of about an additional 2.5 working days in your car each week. I realize that a job is a job and we have to earn money and pay our bills, but if you were given the option of working closer to home, which would result in less stress, better job productivity and more time for yourself, why not explore these options?

 

Plus, do you really have a choice right now? You said you're in the midst of burning out and the travelling is affecting the quality of your work, so you really only have the choice of staying where you are (and being extremely miserable, tired and stressed), or giving yourself a leg-up and seeing what other job opportunities are out there for you to explore.

 

Wouldn't companies be willing to train you? Do you have friends or acquaintances who you can speak to about this, or really anyone who has the knowledge and experience to steer you in the right direction?

 

Do you have any friends at your current workplace, and in the same department, who are in the same boat as you? I'm not encouraging you to speak to others at work, as obviously you can put yourself in a precarious situation if word got out that you were looking at other employment opportunities, but was just curious to know if anyone else you know is in a similar predicament and what they are planning to do.

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I feel like I'm stuck without years and years experience to apply for another.

 

Not true. Four years is plenty. Read up on 'jumping'. Plenty of people do it: they leave their current company on good terms with an understanding that they're targeting specific experience, which they may want to bring back to the prior company someday. In other words, your exit interview would NOT be about complaints, but rather an encouragement for the company to mark you as a 'Yes' to 'Would we rehire?"

 

Jumpers often negotiate deals with former employers to grandfather in their prior time served to reclaim their vestment and other status. Refresh your career education about old fashioned terms like 'loyalty' and 'stability'. Today's stars jump, temp, consult, go to night school--whatever it takes to carve a career path rather than stagnate at a firm that doesn't offer growth and development.

 

If you love your job or their raises or promotions have incentivized you to want to stay, then consider temporarily roughing it in dorm-style, boarding house or multi-roommate living while you invest what would have been commuting time into night school or other ways to raise your value within this company.

 

Otherwise, if you're no longer all that invested, consider using your PTO and work from home days to schedule interviews closer to you. If you land a lateral offer, give notice with an eye toward learning whether you company will somehow sweeten your current deal in order to incentivize you to stay. If not, make the change. If you land a job that's higher pay and a promotion, then take it. Either way, leave current job on best terms with an eye toward possibly rejoining them in the future.

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In your opinion, do you think four hours round trip on top of working in an office setting, is too much? I know some people that work in the city think this is normal.

 

Yes, four hours round trip is too much for most.

 

For people on the East Coast, who can take the train, it might not be too much, but then, they are sleeping/reading/relaxing on their way in and home. Not driving.

 

2 hours each way, driving, plus 8 hours at a desk, yes, it's too much for most. It would be too much for me.

 

I'd start looking for a new job closer to where you live, or look for a place closer to your work. These are your only two options, and it's your choice which one to choose. I don't envy your choice, and I'm sorry that you're going through this.

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Personally I would start looking for jobs closer by. It will be good mentally knowing you are starting to look for a way out.

 

It sounds like you will eventually burn yourself out. I couldn't imagine doing your commute with all that driving. My commute is via train and a bus. Takes me 1.75 hrs one way. I find that tiring but at least I can stick my headphones in and relax. After a long day you have to get in a car and concentrate on driving. That would just add to you feeling even more tired!!!

 

Even though a job can be good and have great benefits. It's not worth burning yourself out for.

 

It seems like it is also getting in the way of your social life. That will only get worst.

 

So it's all good you've realised this all now before it damages you anymore.

 

Start being proactive looking. Best of luck

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  • 4 months later...

Update: So, my boss went on maternity leave and left me with her responsibilities in the interim, and of course at the worst possible time. I've had less time then ever to focus on any one thing to fully finish and I am a multitasker. We also just hired a new person which is completely new, so I'm taking time to train him so the rest of the team isn't taking away from the more important tasks. This role should have shifted to the more senior person, but they didn't think the person was up to the challenge based of their performance. I obviously didn't ask for this to happen, but I also didn't reject the opportunity to show my learned skills either for the next 3 months. So, clearly I'm more stuck at the moment than I was before.

 

So I'm about a month or so in now and I'm feeling very depressed that I'm failing, because I am failing. Every aspect of my job has become atleast 30-40% harder with communication, keeping deadlines, prioritizing and just wanting to get up and go to work. I was given some work mobility to offset the travel, but now I'm doing this and I'm doing the long drive. My mind is already stressed by the time arrive.

 

I'm trying hard not to not to show weakness or complain and stay professional at work. However, my mind is so overwhelmed with doubt, forgetfulness and anixety, that I'm mentally burntout. I have plenty of paid days to take, but how can I cut the cord and walk away?

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Update: So, my boss went on maternity leave and left me with her responsibilities in the interim, and of course at the worst possible time. I've had less time then ever to focus on any one thing to fully finish and I am a multitasker. We also just hired a new person which is completely new, so I'm taking time to train him so the rest of the team isn't taking away from the more important tasks. This role should have shifted to the more senior person, but they didn't think the person was up to the challenge based of their performance. I obviously didn't ask for this to happen, but I also didn't reject the opportunity to show my learned skills either for the next 3 months. So, clearly I'm more stuck at the moment than I was before.

 

So I'm about a month or so in now and I'm feeling very depressed that I'm failing, because I am failing. Every aspect of my job has become atleast 30-40% harder with communication, keeping deadlines, prioritizing and just wanting to get up and go to work. I was given some work mobility to offset the travel, but now I'm doing this and I'm doing the long drive. My mind is already stressed by the time arrive.

 

I'm trying hard not to not to show weakness or complain and stay professional at work. However, my mind is so overwhelmed with doubt, forgetfulness and anixety, that I'm mentally burntout. I have plenty of paid days to take, but how can I cut the cord and walk away?

 

Can you find a B&B or other arrangement to sleep closer to work during the week? Also plan vacation time and use it to apply at agencies closer to home. If anything shakes out of that, you'll have something to leave for.

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Can you find a B&B or other arrangement to sleep closer to work during the week? Also plan vacation time and use it to apply at agencies closer to home. If anything shakes out of that, you'll have something to leave for.
I've tried doing the hotels, sometimes twice a week, but that adds up financially. I'm also being told that a promotion is coming soon, which makes me anxious because I'm not sure I want that and then have to be even more devoted to the job and do additional responsibilities. I've been reading up on some articles recently for tips and examples on what to do and consider. I read that most people make the biggest mistake of getting sucked into something called a "Promotion Trap" where management promotes strong performers based on past performance and uses that to determine potential accomplishments in the future as managers, for company growth, etc. However, they end up turning top performers (like me) into mediocre managers. I would prefer to avoid that happening in my career, and I can kind of already see that happening right now for myself, which I don't want.

 

So, if I'm job searching, and I get offered a promotion, how can I knowingly accept a promotion that I don't want, to keep my job for money and not raise any red flags until I find something else? Wouldn't that be unprofessional?

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I read that most people make the biggest mistake of getting sucked into something called a "Promotion Trap" where management promotes strong performers based on past performance and uses that to determine potential accomplishments in the future as managers, for company growth, etc. However, they end up turning top performers (like me) into mediocre managers.

 

You can just say this ^^^. Or, I already like my job the way it is, but thank you for considering me. Whether that raises flags or not is irrelevant. Companies can assume that most top performers already DO have other options, so the smart ones will use care not to abuse that person. More tone deaf companies abuse and lose people, and that's their problem, not yours.

 

Don't try to control what is not yours to control. If the company figures out that you're seeking other work, they can either try to incentivize you to stay, or not. Otherwise, they would need to build a case for dismissing you before you leave, and that's usually harder to do than to simply treat your relationship as the temporary one that it is.

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No matter what you do, never jump ship until you've secured your next, new job first and foremost. Never be left in limbo such as unemployment because it is extremely difficult to find a job despite what people say. Anybody who has job security and a steady paycheck are awfully fortunate and lucky.

 

Even though you despise your commute, be grateful for your job and should a promotion be forthcoming, then pounce on it and accept so it can tide you over should you embark on your new job hunt. Be shrewd and prudent. Be extremely conservative and wise because you never want to put yourself in a financial dilemma.

 

Never presume you'll beat out your competition for a job or jobs because the odds are not in your favor. Remain employed, search for a new job, secure the next job and THEN quit your current job. That's the way to to do it.

 

Never quit your job unless you have an overlap and secure the next job because that would be plain foolhardy. Think about your survival first.

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  • 1 month later...
No matter what you do, never jump ship until you've secured your next, new job first and foremost. Never be left in limbo such as unemployment because it is extremely difficult to find a job despite what people say. Anybody who has job security and a steady paycheck are awfully fortunate and lucky.

 

Even though you despise your commute, be grateful for your job and should a promotion be forthcoming, then pounce on it and accept so it can tide you over should you embark on your new job hunt. Be shrewd and prudent. Be extremely conservative and wise because you never want to put yourself in a financial dilemma.

 

Never presume you'll beat out your competition for a job or jobs because the odds are not in your favor. Remain employed, search for a new job, secure the next job and THEN quit your current job. That's the way to to do it.

 

Never quit your job unless you have an overlap and secure the next job because that would be plain foolhardy. Think about your survival first.

I am absolutely grateful that I have a job that pays decent, but I also know that this is also a employee's job economy now too where there are quite a few jobs that are going unfilled. So, I know my current employer is trying to retain me because they see my work ethic trying to get things done, but I'm mentally and physically BURNT OUT. I shouldn't feel like that at a job right now. Also, between the drive and the extra job responsibilities, I know I dont want this type of work life balance going the way as it is, it's no way to live your life. I'm trying to pull back and establishing a work-life balance. But, I'm told that my employer is going to be promoting me from hourly to salaried a want to schedule a review by next week, so now my work-life balance will probably go out the window because now I'll be relied on WAY more to pick up the slack of the team and work longer hours, which I DO NOT want to do. I'm just feeling like everything's moving so quickly and I'm having trouble keeping track of what's changing that how this is going to affect my career at this company going forward and what my say is, because it seems like they're just piling on more responsibilities because nobody else is there to do it or they simply don't have the persons to do it anymore.

 

Do you think it's wrong to accept promotion for short time, while looking for another job and then give your notice?

 

I'm trying to look at this from the best option for myself and travel, because I've been too tired to do job hunting lately which has led me to this predicament. I don't want to accept the promotion and then a couple of months later give a notice if I go d a job I like better and then burn a reference. I'm afraid it would look bad. I'm feeling like I'm in a catch 22 now.

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I commute a couple of hours each way in Los Angeles. it is worth it to me because the career and pay is so much better then out in the sticks. However, I have several ways to make it less painful.

 

I take public transport a lot: train, bus, etc.

When I drive, I do errands, stop to see friends. I even do a bit of sightseeing. There is always somewhere interesting to go to. Who says I have to do the slingshot ride down the crowded freeway?

Satellite radio helps too. I listen to podcasts, old time radio classics, a zillion music genres.

 

Have you considered hat maybe it is not really the commute that is getting to you, but the job itself?

 

BTW, I've moved long distance for jobs four times. Only once was it a mistake. And every time it was for a significant bump in pay.

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