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What to do in crisis situations?

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I have quite a bad depression for which I have to take medication. As far as I can tell it's mostly due to my loneliness. When you're nearing 30 and still hoping for your first kiss it just really wears on you. As long as there is someone I can view as a potential partner, I can manage it decently thanks to my medication, but as I recently faced rejection all my usual depressive symptoms came back in full force. I usually get stuck in a situation where I'm unable to do anything but lay down and cry and it can last hours. It is at these points, that suicide feels like the only option. As unfortunate as it is, if I had access to something that'd dispatch me quickly and painlessly like a bullet to the brain, I would in all likelihood wouldn't even be here.

When I'm in this state I usually even avoid going outside, because I once almost got hit by a car. Just totally ignoring my surroundings and then I even got angry at the driver even though I was crossing while I absolutely shouldn't have. What's in some ways even worse is that my mental illness turns me inside into a very bad person. Fortunately I'm very good at suppressing my emotions when needed so I don't ever do outbursts in front of people. in my mind though I start to hate the whole world and women in particular. I sort of get a twisted logic where I blame them for problems that are my own. The logic usually goes like this: by not wanting to date me they cause me all this suffering and therefore they must be "es". I know it's false and my well being is no one else's responsibility but my own and pity can never be seen as a valid reason to date someone. Nevertheless when I'm feeling this terrible I usually get into this very bad mindset. I also end up telling myself I'll just be lonely my whole life and nobody will want to date me ever etc...


On the bright side I have very supportive friends: most of them know about my condition and are very helpful. Except when I have my crises like the current one, they don't really know what to tell me to cheer me up even though they care about me. I had a really great therapist who often helped me a lot in these moments of crisis (she even managed to cure my social anxiety which was a huge accomplishment), but she retired and my current one just isn't as good. I'd welcome any ideas on what I should do in these moments of crisis, because I don't want this stupid disease get the better of me.

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If you are receiving medication, why are they not prescribing counseling? I feel you should discuss these issues truthfully with your practitioner. The thoughts of suicide can be a side effect of the medication you are taking...and while some medication works for some, it may not for others. It is up to you to be proactive in your mental health. Go back to your doctor, tell them what you have described here, so they can get you the help you need.

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You're taking a positive step by writing here, OP. We can't substitute for a professional, or for medication, but there is always someone around to listen and respond to you. Does your current therapist know about your suicidal thoughts?


I would strongly encourage you to seek out a crisis hotline in your area. Again, they are trained to speak to you and help guide you through the darkest moments whenever you have the need to make a call.


Do you have other therapeutic outlets for your emotions? A dear family friend of mine who suffers from severe depression (and other mental health issues) and has previously attempted suicide has found great solace in art. She is actually truly gifted, but she has learned to soothe some of her pain through the process of creation. I know she has many days, even weeks, in which she cannot summon the energy to leave her house. But she can make it to her easel in her garden, and lose herself in her painting. Another family member who similarly suffers deeply took up a position as a volunteer dog-walker at a local animal shelter. She tells me that being around animals, and helping to care for them, brings her tremendous comfort and eases her loneliness at times when she just doesn't feel she can face people. Both of these women have sought such outlets as a complement to their regular therapy and medication. Perhaps there is something similar out there for you?

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@smackie9 Thanks. You're right, when it comes to mental help: I sometimes do way too much of care on my own. I got an appointment with my psychiatrist and I'll discuss medication with her.

@MissCanuck I tried to call a crisis center. They were right to remind me to get something to eat: I haven't eaten much recently.As for activities: honestly video games is the only activity, that worked reliably for me. Doing anything else and I just get too distracted by my despair. Unfortunately they have a certain addictive nature if I stay on them too long.

@Unreasonable Best evidence for that is simply the fact that whenever there is a girl I feel like I'd have a shot with, everything about my mood improves. I enjoy my work, I become instantly more social, I do sports, I clean my apartment I bake for my friends etc... Remove the woman from the equation and all the joy gets sucked out of these things and I'm feeling like I'm feeling right now after facing rejection. As for the steps: I socialize at different meetup groups/clubs I find interesting and hope I'll find a woman with whom there's a mutual attraction. My very first step actually was getting rid of my social anxiety, which was the reason why I haven't been doing that in the first place.

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Have you considered it may be a catch-22 situation? That the video game issue is why you can't get dates and because you can't get dates you escape into video games? Something to discuss on your next appt.

I got an appointment with my psychiatrist and I'll discuss medication with her.



"According to the Center for On-Line Addiction, warning signs for video game addiction include:

Playing for increasing amounts of time

Thinking about gaming during other activities

Gaming to escape from real-life problems, anxiety, or depression

Lying to friends and family to conceal gaming

Feeling irritable when trying to cut down on gaming

In addition, video game addicts tend to become isolated, dropping out of their social networks and giving up other hobbies. "It's about somebody who has completely withdrawn from other activities," Young says."

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