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So I am posting to try and get some clarity in my life.

 

My fiancée and I broke up a few weeks ago. She said she hates me and never wants to talk to me or have anything to do with me EVER!

 

Here is what is weird.

 

- She claims she met a guy way better than me.

 

- A few days ago after ignoring her I had 14 missed calls from her. She then proceeded to text me and ask if I was in her house. I told her no and FaceTime her to prove that. She started freaking out and had me come over to her house to search for the supposeed intruder. There was nothing there. I ended up spending three hours with her after the fact.

 

- she had me come over and bring her ice cream. We laughed and smiled and talked. Later that night she called me and talked about a future with me

 

- She claimed to have gotten rid of all of our photos and sold everything I ever gave her. This is simply not true she still has every single thing to include my personal items such as my military dog tags.

 

I am trying to figure out what’s going on. The reason we broke up was she claimed all we did was argue and fight. And that simply wasn’t the case. I’m not saying I was an angel but it wasn’t as bad as she makes it out to be.

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Her perception of your relationship may not be correct, but it will still dictate how she views the two of you. I had an ex who was the same way. We had spats here and there, in my opinion nothing big or unusual, but he had it stuck in his mind that we never stopped fighting. Nothing I said or did ever changed his mind, and eventually, I had to accept that whether or not he was objectively right, he was still basing his decisions off the idea that we fought too frequently.

 

Based on the instability you described, I would be surprised if you did fight a lot, though. She's all over the place. I know you probably love her, but it sounds like the core compatibility necessary to make a marriage work simply isn't there. Best to grieve and move forward.

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Her perception of your relationship may not be correct, but it will still dictate how she views the two of you. I had an ex who was the same way. We had spats here and there, in my opinion nothing big or unusual, but he had it stuck in his mind that we never stopped fighting. Nothing I said or did ever changed his mind, and eventually, I had to accept that whether or not he was objectively right, he was still basing his decisions off the idea that we fought too frequently.

 

Based on the instability you described, I would be surprised if you did fight a lot, though. She's all over the place. I know you probably love her, but it sounds like the core compatibility necessary to make a marriage work simply isn't there. Best to grieve and move forward.

 

Of course I love her. It’s humorous how we got in a huge fight tonight. And then I called to say I’m sorry for being mad. And she starts being concerned with who I’m texting. Starts bragging about her life. Said again she never wanted to talk to me but she did. What does all this mean??

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How long have you been dating? What was the fight about and why were you ignoring her? How old is she? Breaking up because "all you do is argue and fight" is a very good reason to end things.

A few days ago after ignoring her I had 14 missed calls from her. she had me come over and bring her ice cream. We laughed and smiled and talked.The reason we broke up was she claimed all we did was argue and fight.
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She’s 21. Yesterday we had a huge fight that resulted in us yelling at each other and her trying to hit me and run me over with her car. She now says she never wants to talk but is still trying to talk about the new man. Last night she was all concerned as to who I was texting. This is all so confusing

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Oh my, she's bat **** crazy and unhinged. Block her. There's nothing attractive about that behavior unless you love drama.

 

Definitely don’t love drama. What I don’t get is why she’s trying to throw the blame on me sayin I’m the bad one.

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Why is it confusing? She wants to break up, so you delete and block her and stop talking to her. Simple. You don't go on and on about what a psycho she is then want her back.

She’s 21. Yesterday we had a huge fight that resulted in us yelling at each otherThis is all so confusing
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Why is it confusing? She wants to break up, so you delete and block her and stop talking to her. Simple. You don't go on and on about what a psycho she is then want her back.

 

I don’t want her back. I want to understand her mentality. Why she wants to try and do crazy like run me over

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You're not a psychiatrist you are not being paid to "understand" crazy people. Your job is to stop talking to her and block and delete her and avoid crazy gfs like this in the future. Google "Hot/Crazy Scale".

I don’t want her back. I want to understand her mentality. Why she wants to try and do crazy like run me over
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Because she's not over it! Anger is an emotion which means she cares.

 

You really think that’s the case??? Even though she claims she hates me and wants nothing to do with me. She’s got me blocked too. Do you think she will eventually come back???,

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You really think that’s the case??? Even though she claims she hates me and wants nothing to do with me. She’s got me blocked too. Do you think she will eventually come back???,
Sure.

 

She might feel the need to come back for some validation only to rip your heart out again.

 

But come back for good? Nope

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This doesn't sound very therapeutic to help you overcome problems from the military. What about friends, family, hospitals, doctors, therapists and the many Vets organizations? Please start now to research and reach out for help. It seems more like she is a symptom of those problems, not the cure.

yelling at each other and her trying to hit me and run me over with her car.
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Because she cares, and so do you if it's making you jealous. Stop letting her be toxic to you and wait until she calms down. This will get you both nowhere because neither of you are doing any changing. This will never work like this.

 

You honestly think that even though she’s doing all this ie blocking, making me jealous, saying she never wants to speak, ect. She still cares??? And do you think time and space will honestly help??

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Yes and yes. If you don't distance yourself you're blowing any chance of being anything in the future.

I still advise you to move on from this. I know you were engaged and it's hard to let go but this is toxic.

 

So do you think we can bounce back and heal from this over time??

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