Jem123 Posted March 14, 2018 Share Posted March 14, 2018 Even if not many people respond to this, I think I'll feel a little better after typing it out, as I have no one to talk to at the moment. I was with my boyfriend since I was 17, and he's ended things (literally half an hour ago) now that I'm 21. I knew this was coming as he had sent messages stating that he's unhappy and doesn't see a future with us, but I'm still completely heartbroken. He's also done the same thing twice in the past - the first time was 2015, we were split up for a month before he realised he made a mistake, and the second time in 2016 he did the exact same thing, except it only lasted a week. I took him back both times because I love him and I believed he was sorry, and when he isn't acting like that he is a really loving boyfriend and we've spend a lot of enjoyable time together. Since it didn't happen at all in 2017, I was really happy and thought it was just a phase that had passed. We took a trip to London together and spent so much time together and I felt really happy, so I can't understand why he says he doesn't feel the same way. Now that this has happened for a third time, I actually think this feels the worst of the three because I think it may be for good since it's for the same reason as the other times, making me think he must have always felt like this. What's confusing is that he says he loves me, enjoys being with me, still wants me in his life and cares about me, but it's not enough since he doesn't see a future, but he apparently can't explain why he doesn't. I don't understand how you could feel these things for a person but not want to be with them, espeically when I have always been loyal, honest and loving towards him I, on the other hand, have always been able to see a future with him, and I don't want to be with anyone but him. That's why this hurts so much. Every single time he's done this, especially this time, it's just felt so utterly wrong. I even said that to him tonight and he just said 'I know'. Nothing about what he's said has made sense, how can you love someone, want them in your life and enjoy speding time with them but not want to be with them? That just makes no sense to me. So overall, tonight I didn't get much out of him apart from the fact that he doesn't see a future but can't explain why, and he feels like we haven't progressed. But how can we have progressed when we've both been stuck at university for the past three years? That's another thing, we both finish university and come back home in a few months, and knowing I'd have him there bein with me was the only thing comforting me, so that's also getting me down since my friends still all have a year left at uni and I'm probably going to be quite alone. After talking, we just sat in silence for a bit while I cried, he gave me multiple hugs, held my hand and said he was sorry and he was actually looking at me with love in his eyes, which is another reason why it felt wrong because it just seemed like he didn't want to do it. Even though it probably only lasted about 35 minutes before he let himself out, the whole experience broke my heart because I still felt such a strong connection and it felt like he did too. He offered to come and see me next week, but why would he want to do that if he doesn't want to be with me anymore? I would love to still have him in my life, but only as a boyfriend, so seeing him probably isn't a good idea. I just don't understand why this has happened, I'm so completely heartbroken and I've been crying non stop since. I've never felt this down before in my life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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