I am utterly confused

[boltnrun]

I think I’m still in that stage where I love her and I don’t see things all that clear. I think with time I’ll be able to notice everything.

 

Sigh...We're going in circles here.

 

In order to break the spell your only option is to stop communicating with her.

 

Otherwise she'll still be laying on the blame and the guilt trips. And you'll still be hoping she "changes" so you two can get back together.

 

If you don't stop communicating you are condemning yourself to a lifetime of being her doormat in between her boyfriends.

 

The question is...do you want to spend the next 15-20 years feeling exactly as you do right now? Or do you want to feel better and move forward?

 

You have complete and total control over this.

[MissCanuck]

She definitely doesn't love you, OP.

 

You are wasting your time even talking to her. She isn't going to be the one you settle down with forever.

[Giblesp]

This is actually the second time she does this. Last time she broke up with me for no reason and went to the same guy she’s with right now

 

Why are you tolerating this sort of nonsense in your life? Take back someone who treats you with no respect and unsurprisingly they will do it again. Stop being a doormat to a spoiled little girl.

[RayRay63]

^^^^ This^^^^

[Tuna010]

I agree with the other posters, I know it's hard if you still have feelings but she really is treating you badly! If she's talking to you about other guys she likes doesnt that hurt? The bad thing is I kind of did what she's doing to my ex ex because I knew he would do anything to be with me so I vented to him when things were going bad for me for self esteem boost then I realised how unhealthy this behaviour was and told him. I had no feelings for him but wanted him around as support to make me feel wanted if someone else didn't want me, horrible I know but it sounds like what she's doing. If I were you I would say "this friendship isn't working for me, good luck with your future" and block her.

[Pleasedonot5]

Yeah, she's using you. People often test your boundaries. If you have none, you'll never get your way. Show her you're serious about being respected and kick her out. Be as honest as you would like.

[sputnik123]

Hi Larajuan,

 

Sorry you have to put up with this garbage.

 

I agree with everyone else. No contact from here on in.

 

Make it happen.

[Larajuan]

A couple of weeks ago me and my ex broke up for certain reasons. She said she would never talk to me again and all of that. Last week she texted me about her ex I replied to her and from there we started talking. We even saw each other this past weekend. I thought things were going well and then she told me she just wanted to be single. So I respected that. Today she texted me saying she still likes the person she went with after we broke up and that kinda caught me off guard. She said she wants to be friends with me and I told her that I rather not be and just cut off all ties and she said that we shouldn’t that she really cares about me that she doesn’t want to be in a relationship. Point is I’m confused I do not know what she is thinking or what she wants. Just a couple of weeks ago she didn’t care about me and didn’t want anything to do with me but here she is.

 

So me and my ex started talking again. We even started hang out. It seemed that we were going to get back together when she tells me that she’s talking to the guy she left me for. For some reason I wanted it to work with her but I realized it was never going to work. I’m finally taking everyone’s advice and I’ve come to realization that she never liked me that she just used me. It was just hard for me to accept it.