Asking out my ex?

[RyanJ64]

We have been apart for 9 months 3 of which we didnt talk or see each other at all. The vreak up was 100% my fault but i owned up to it and learned from it.

 

We have been chatting for the last few weeks, but only a hand full of times. We have met up once or twice, nothing fancy.

 

I want to ask her out to dinner. I am still madly inlove with this woman. Our close friends tell me shes hiding, that shes not as happy as she says she is. Yet when I message her she doesnt respond until 5 to 10 hours later.

 

I just want to know if I should do it. Wont she just push me back further.

[MissCanuck]

We have been apart for 9 months 3 of which we didnt talk or see each other at all. The vreak up was 100% my fault but i owned up to it and learned from it.

 

We have been chatting for the last few weeks, but only a hand full of times. We have met up once or twice, nothing fancy.

 

I want to ask her out to dinner. I am still madly inlove with this woman. Our close friends tell me shes hiding, that shes not as happy as she says she is. Yet when I message her she doesnt respond until 5 to 10 hours later.

 

I just want to know if I should do it. Wont she just push me back further.

 

Why did your break up?

[Wiseman2]

Try not to listen to hearsay intended to tell you what they know you want to hear to make you feel better. She's happy going out, dating enjoying life. believe her. You could continue to chase her and ruin chances with the new girl you're dating but you may be chasing the friendzone.

Our close friends tell me shes hiding, that shes not as happy as she says she is. Yet when I message her she doesnt respond until 5 to 10 hours later.

[Hollyj]

I still don't understand how the break up was your fault? You slept with someone while you were apart.

[boltnrun]

Have you ended things with the girl you were dating?

[drcarol]

It's great that you learned from your mistakes with her (whatever they were). Most people keep repeating the same ones over and over!

 

But with that said, have you figured out WHY you did what you did? Was it you? Or was it something between the two of you that lead you to act the way you did?

 

I usually don't think it's a good thing to get back with an ex. Why? Because usually you encounter the same problems again. I know you have changed, but to keep up different behaviors in the long term is difficult for some people. I'm not saying you shouldn't try to ask her out again, but remember that if you guys do get back together, you really need to address and fix all the reasons that lead to the breakup.

 

But hey, give it a shot if you want to. Just be mentally and emotionally prepared for it to not work out again. If it does work out, then great! If not, then take the lessons you learned and apply them to your next relationship.

 

Good luck! :)

[RyanJ64]

I did end things with the other girl. It was only two dates so not that bad.

It was all my fault, I was the who got drunk and slept with someone else, If you knew me you would know that isnt me. Not at all. And what I did hurt her so badly.

 

The thing is we have these mutual friends who dated, broke up and were apart for nearly a year and that guy had slept with a few people and even dated a girl for a few months after they split. They got back together and are very much in love.

 

I just feel if they could make it work, so could we!