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I have a crush on my coworker--and I'm pretty sure it's mutual. How to tell?


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So one of my male coworkers just started working at my place of employment in July, and I have been working there for five years. He is a Team Lead (manager) and coordinates duties for team members (we work in sales/customer service). He is 25 and I am 28.


I have felt an attraction since around the time he started, but it's grown a lot more intense recently as we have been working with each other 2 or 3 times a week. I'm trying to figure out if he's really flirting with me or not, if he's potentially interested... Here are some examples:


1) We are both comfortable exchanging sexual innuendos, making sexual jokes, and basically being quite open about sex.

2) We both sit at the front desk/customer service area of the facility, and he sits behind me. He is always commenting on things I'm doing on the computer, and will try to talk to me even if I'm trying to be quiet/ignore him.

3) He comes over to my desk randomly... like he'll walk by and tap a random key on my keyboard just to be silly.

4) One time, he was sitting in the check-in area and I was at the desk, and he was sitting in a place where he could see me from the front. I was helping a customer at my desk, and I looked up and I saw him staring at me. After 2 or 3 seconds he didn't stop staring, so I looked away. But I have caught him staring sometimes.

5) He keeps making this running joke that there is a 35-year-old guy who comes in at 4:30pm that has a crush on me. And I blush and laugh and I keep telling him no, there is no such guy and he's making it all up.

6) We both had birthdays in November, and he keeps teasing me that I just turned 30. I really don't know why, but he finds it funny. Is he being mean or just flirty teasing?

7) One time, we were both alone and he asked me if I wanted to stay a little longer after my shift ended. And I'm paraphrasing, but he said something like, "Oh you know you want to stay here with me..." Around this same time, he asked how long I'd been single for.

8) Other night, me, my crush, and a new male coworker were all talking and somehow the topic of crushes came up, and both guys asked me if I had a crush on anyone. I said that I did but didn't want to say who. Then they started going back and forth asking me questions about my crush, like, "Does he live here?", "Does he work here?", "Is he black or white?" (my crush is black), etc... trying to figure out who my crush is.

9) One night, my crush and I were leaving work around the same time, but he left just before I did. We had been flirting and laughing a lot that night, and my other female coworker said to me before I left, "Ooo, got a little fling going on, huh?" And she told me that he never smiles that much on a normal shift. So apparently it was obvious to her that we like each other.

10) The other night, I learned that two other coworkers of mine know about my crush, just based on our behavior towards each other. I also feel like I get weird looks from other coworkers when my crush and I are laughing or being silly together. So I guess it is starting to get really obvious.

11) Whenever I ask my crush for help with something on the computer (which we rely on heavily), he always sits and/or stands extra close to me. I can just feel the tension sizzling.


There are many more examples of his flirty behavior, but I have two questions:


1) Does it sound like he likes me? Is the teasing a form of flirting?

2) I am planning on asking him out when I see him this coming Thursday. I hope to catch him at the end of my shift and I'll say something really harmless like, "Hey, you wanna go out sometime?" and just see his reaction and go from there. Does this seem like a good thing to say to him?


Thanks in advance for any help! It's much appreciated. :)

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It does sound like there is a mutual attraction, and I think your plan seems reasonable. The only thing I would add is that dating a coworker could get awkward for you and/or your other coworkers for various reasons. For example, if you break up, it could be inconvenient for you. And some people who date at work are just downright irritating to the other people in the work environment (and oblivious to it). It does depend on the environment, though. I don't know what your work atmosphere is like.

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I agree with Jibralta, it does sound like there is a mutal attraction between you 2, and coworkers dating will be awkward.


What you could do if you still want to go, is don't be too easy, make him work for you, that always makes me work harder, there was this one girl, that ing did this on me, and I haven't even met her more then 1 date, and shoved the other date for 2.3 weeks, and I ing fell for her.(horrible, i really was scared when I ing understood it was attentional.) level it up abit, start touching hims arms, say he have something on his mouth and pick it up and flick it away (surely after you eat together) you get the idea, get touchy to your level. Send him mixed signals makes us crazy confused and you hard to figure out(which makes us headaches but a challange)

IF THAT doesn't work, it's either his a shy guy, or again he doesn't want the akwardness. SO it's either you ball up and ask him out or get alternative way to do that(which would be better if it came casually i recommand this one ).

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