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No, you definitely made the right decision. Look at the size of your post. Your whole life with him would be like that. Not worth the head space.

 

You’re right. I felt like the communication was like pulling teeth, which was a turn-off, so due to these doubts and others, I wasn’t really disappointed when things didn’t work out.

 

And yes, my post is large. I was surprised at the size once it posted. I type quickly, so it didn’t feel long as I was typing.

 

I should note that this guy seemed frustrated with OLD, yet he was the author of his own misfortune in our case (I.e. the lack of follow through). It’s kinda scary that there are people frustrated with the process, yet they are their own worst enemies. Some people blame the process, but it isn’t the process, it’s them. And for some reason, they don’t realize that it’s their actions or lack thereof that’s holding them back.

 

Anyway, I’m just rambling now. But this is one of the reasons I had to clarify to him my reasons for walking. It seemed like he was completely clueless.

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And yes, my post is large. I was surprised at the size once it posted. I type quickly, so it didn’t feel long as I was typing.

 

I just pointed that out to show the kind of time and effort you would have to put into a relationship with him. Typing may have been fast, but this has obviously been occupying space in your head for a while.

 

It’s kinda scary that there are people frustrated with the process, yet they are their own worst enemies. Some people blame the process, but it isn’t the process, it’s them. And for some reason, they don’t realize that it’s their actions or lack thereof that’s holding them back.

 

Oh, there are people like that all over the place, not just OLD. Just read some of the posts on this site. I bet you have friends, family, and coworkers who fit that bill. Everyone does. I think maybe all of us self-sabotage to some extent. If you pursued this guy, or someone like him, it would be a similar act of self-sabotage.

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Ok, so in terms of working on improving my diet, I’m having a SUPER hard time cutting out fruit juice and chocolate milk. I love apple, o.j., pineapple juice, etc. I’m definitely not a sweets person, but have a weakness for juice. If I go a day without it, I feel like I’m going to be sick/pass out.

 

I’m slowly cutting it out. I’ll either water down a small glass of juice each day and drink it or just fill up on water, but I still crave it! Chocolate milk not as much, but every now and then I do.

 

Has anyone else ever felt this way?

 

I’m thinking that when I’m feeling sick or like I’m going to pass out (when I haven’t consumed juice all day), it’s my body experiencing withdrawal from the lack of sugar from the fruit juice, but I’m not sure if that’s the case or even possible.

 

I honestly consume a lot of juice each day, especially in this humidity! I’m beginning to think that this may be the cause of my small weight gain...the gosh darn juice!

 

I feel like I should change the title of my journal to “Attack of the Fruit Juice” or “how do you like them apples?”...ok, I digress...I’m going off topic.

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Yes, juice will pack on calories and pounds -empty calories, unfortunately. I don't crave liquids other than when I was a diet soda fiend and i love my morning coffee. I would continue to do the watering down and maybe eat a whole fruit if you are craving juice.

 

I don't think not having juice will cause you to feel like passing out - but dehydration could give you that feeling. So I'd keep doing the water or maybe sparkling water. Sorry you're feeling that way!

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Agree you definitely did the right thing; I would have done same.

 

I don't typically like to bash guys on this forum, but yeah some guys are truly clueless and need things spelled out to them in big bold letters before they "get it."

 

For me, once I tell a guy, politely like you did, we're not a match, I would block (when I had the block function). That was to avoid exactly what this guy did, continue to bombard you with text asking why or trying to talk you out of it.

 

In your case, the guy flaked on you, totally stood you up, so if this had been me, when he texted again asking why or whatever he said acting clueless and challenging you (which would have annoyed me), I would have no problem txting back with "What are you dense? You totally flaked on me last Thursday, goodbye!"

 

And then blocking; if you don't have block function on your phone (I don't anymore) have his texts sent automatically to your trash! What a bozo.

 

Hang in mily, it will get better, I promise! :D

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All of a sudden he messages me today, "Hi Milly, it's Ben. We haven't met yet? How was your weekend?". .

 

You are right on track and yes, use your own ways of treating others as a measure of how you wish to be treated.

 

The fact that he blew off the Thursday meet up was more than enough reason, coupled with his lame question not being certain whether or not you had even met - is further confirmation.

What a tool.

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  • 4 weeks later...

Does anyone else here not like using FaceTime as the first time seeing/meeting someone?

 

Had someone I connected with online ask me if I wanted to FaceTime. I cringed when I read his request.

 

Have only exchanged a couple of messages with him online. Haven’t met him in person.

 

There’s something about it that turns me off.

Edited by milly007
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I would never have done that. And I also didn’t send more pictures of myself. I posted four photos one with almost full body and supplied my actual height and weight. (I erred on the side of my weight on a not great day but I was thin). I would have felt really self conscious doing FaceTime with a stranger. For several years before I did online dating sites I went on many blind dates and met men through written personal ads so meeting strangers in person was fine with me and preferred.

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Thanks figureitout and Batya.

 

Yeah, I told him as soon as I got his message that FaceTiming wasn’t for me.

 

It’s funny, I’m fine with a phone call, but FaceTiming is just something that turns me off. Can’t really put my finger on why I feel this way. Maybe it’s because I wonder if the guy is wanting me to prove that I’m the person in my pics. Not sure. Also, phone calls can be awkward enough, and toss in an awkward angle on FaceTime with a complete stranger and yeah...no thanks.

 

I think I also just miss the days of people making more of an effort. Everything is so easy these days. Texting, emailing, FaceTiming, etc.

 

I guess I just have a preferred way of communicating and meeting. I like when after exchanging a few messages, a guy proposes a meet up (even a phone call before a meet is ok, too).

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I exchanged a few emails and I wouldn’t meet without a phone call. I was able to screen out a number of people who sent lovely emails based on the phone call. With rare exception if the phone call went well we met ASAP. I met over 100 men in person.

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  • 3 months later...

So I met a couple of people in my building today for the first time. They were quite nice!

 

My one neighbour has the cutest pets and invited me over to see them (I'm a big animal fan!).

 

So as we were chatting, for about half an hour, I began to feel really warm and then all of a sudden felt like I was going to pass out!

 

I've noticed that my unit is ridiculously warm this year (and we've been having a more mild winter), so the temps inside are a bit warm considering the temps outside are not normal winter temperatures here.

 

Anyway, I began to fan myself, interrupt our conversation and tell her that I have to run out in the hall for some air before I pass out (because I was finding it really warm).

 

I told her, as I stood out in the hall, that I didn't want to be rude, but had to go back to my unit to grab some water as I was feeling faint.

 

She acknowledged that her apartment is very warm and needs to speak with the owner of the building about it (she's been meaning to for a while), and I informed her that I've found my unit the same.

 

So when I get back to my unit, I just barely got the door unlocked and open before I ran to the washroom and was sick to my stomach.

 

I have no idea if this is just the result of feeling over-heated and dehydrated, but I ran into my neighbour about five minutes later and she asked if I had low blood pressure (which I have no idea if I have). Could have been for a combination of reasons - dehydration, low blood pressure, who knows...

 

Just over a year ago, I was out shopping, and I was speaking with a salesman, I proceeded to feel over-heated (took off my coat) and collapsed to the ground. I tried to fight myself and prevent it from happening, but nope, didn't work. I was mortified! I actually tried to get this salesman to go away before it happened because I could feel that there was a possibility of me passing out, but he wouldn't listen. He continued to stand there until I fell to my knees. I tried to get up immediately, as he went to get help. Although they wanted to call an ambulance and call my emergency contacts, I refused to give them my information. The last thing I wanted was my family to get a call saying I passed out and was at the hospital. Sheesh.

 

Anyway, I'd like to think I'm taking good care of myself, but I've been ridiculously stressed over the last couple of years - moving to a new city, starting a new job, a huge lay-off at the company I was working for (which didn't affect me, but it was still unreal, and affected a lot of friends, single parents, etc.), sick loved ones, finding a new job, etc. Maybe I'm not making myself as much of a priority as I thought was these days, and I could use a tip or two on how to manage stress better - no doubt about that.

 

Either way, gotta make a doctor's appointment, stat.

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Do you maybe get low blood sugar? I get low blood sugar very quickly and it feels like you’re going to pass out and throw up . I had an episode recently waiting in a walk-in clinic and I almost fell out of the chair on my face from low blood sugar.

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Do you maybe get low blood sugar? I get low blood sugar very quickly and it feels like you’re going to pass out and throw up . I had an episode recently waiting in a walk-in clinic and I almost fell out of the chair on my face from low blood sugar.

 

It's a possibility, Seraphim. Hopefully the doctor will have some answers.

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Do you maybe get low blood sugar? I get low blood sugar very quickly and it feels like you’re going to pass out and throw up . I had an episode recently waiting in a walk-in clinic and I almost fell out of the chair on my face from low blood sugar.

 

How do you manage these types of incidents and prevent yourself from fainting/falling?

 

Do you carry food/snacks with you so you can have a quick sugar fix?

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How do you manage these types of incidents and prevent yourself from fainting/falling?

 

Do you carry food/snacks with you so you can have a quick sugar fix?

 

I carry candies in my purse. This time I had none and my husband was at Walmart so he came running over with something for me to eat. My son and my mom are the same. We eat small snacks in between meals as well. Orange juice will work as well.

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I carry candies in my purse. This time I had none and my husband was at Walmart so he came running over with something for me to eat. My son and my mom are the same. We eat small snacks in between meals as well. Orange juice will work as well.

 

Thanks, Seraphim. Will keep this in mind and may start carrying a few sweets in my purse (I.e. - granola bars, candies, etc.) just in case.

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Do either of you get clammy/sweat when this is happening?

 

I mean, I think the heat in my neighbour’s apartment brought this on - it was too hot! Felt like I couldn’t breath. Don’t think it could just be low blood sugar, but who knows...

 

And normally I’m more on the cold side.

 

I think the same thing happened at that store just over a year ago. Got hot, felt weak, and then the knees buckled.

 

Either way, will ask the dr.

Edited by milly007
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Do either of you get clammy/sweat when this is happening?

 

Yes. And it feels like your stomach fell into your feet. And you have a deep pain nauseated feeling in the pit of your stomach. Your head spins. Sometimes my mouth will pour saliva .

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