Slapped him then he blocked me

[noneofyourbizz]

Had been dating guy for a little over a month. Sex was amazing and it seems lately that's all we did. I know it was quick, but we started not using protection.

 

Three days ago, I blocked his messages and calls because I was angry and starting to develop feelings for him that I wasn't sure he shared. He called me from anonymous numbers and sent messages begging for me to speak to him and to unblock him, which I did.

 

He came over the next night and after unprotected sex, I inquired if he was indeed only sleeping with me and only having unprotected sex with me. He said no and nonchalantly replied, "I'll use protection from now on".

 

When I sought a further explanation on why his answer had changed because he had previously told me I was the only one, he repeated his answer and reached for a condom to have sex again and I slapped his face and got out of bed.

 

He came behind me and asked me was I crazy and started to put on his clothes to leave. I stopped him and apologized and explained that I had gotten emotional and it was my fault for putting my health in a man's hands that I barely knew and felt he was very nonchalant about the whole thing.

 

He was very angry and kept saying how no woman has ever slapped him and how he could rearrange my face if he wanted, but that he wouldn't retaliate.

 

This conversation went around in circles for an hour or more with him saying he thought I was normal but now he thinks I am a covert crazy woman. He then asked me to delete all the pictures we had taken together. I refused and said that he was overreacting.

 

We then had unprotected sex again and I fell asleep only to be awoken again in a couple of hours with him talking about his anger at slapping him. He said I can't sleep now because maybe you will stab me in my sleep. I don't know what you will do anymore. I assured him he was exaggerating and that I was just emotional and it was wrong what I did. He said that my emotions was not his problem and that did not give me a right to assault him. He then questioned why I slept with him with no condom and said he didn't force me and didn't rape me and it was my decision.

 

We ended up having sex again for over an hour at which during, he slapped me twice harder than I had slapped him. The second time, I grabbed his hand and said you've hit me back, we are even now... don't hit me again. He said that we were not even and got a little aggressive during sex, slightly choking me. Did I enjoy it? yes.

 

We then went to sleep and he again woke me up in an hour, fully dressed, talking about what happened. We ordered food as about 10 hours had now passed from the original slap at 2 am. It was not 12 noon.

 

We ate, laughed, talked. We then had sex again and I fell asleep again to be woken up to him dressed saying he's leaving and no woman will slap him and that he is a strong man and how dare I. He said he wished he had never met me and I was crazy. I was growing tired of this merry go round, and basically just listened.

 

We then hugged and had sex again and afterwards we talked and I said maybe to keep confusion and emotions down, we should just use a condom from now on. He said he thought that was best also. In about an hour, he started kissing my back and caressing me and attempted to penetrate me without a condom. It was now about 4 pm. I stopped him and handed him a condom in which he tossed on the floor, got off of me, and laid down away from me.

 

I fell asleep and in an hour, he again woke me up fully dressed and said he was leaving. I walked him to the door and he would usually turn to kiss me, but didn't.

 

I grabbed his shoulder and asked what was going on. He said you slapped me and it's over.... no woman hits me.

 

I knew I was wrong to hit him but thought we had made up and he had forgiven me.

 

I said that I was confused and he said it's over.

 

I then just reopened the door and he walked out and left.

 

When he left, I sent him two messages on whatsapp and he read them and then blocked me and deleted me from facebook. I called his phone several times with no answer.

 

Did he overreact or did I cause all this mess myself?

 

We also work together and I just don't know what he will say and do. I didn't feel we were enemies enough to block each other permanently and he slept with me all day unprotected and to leave and just do that without a further conversation is hurtful.

 

I don't think he's pretending. Is he a douche bag or did I just blow it by losing control and becoming violent first? Is there anyway to reconcile this?

 

Please help and sorry for the typos as I typed in a rush.

[Capricorn3]

did I cause all this mess myself?

 

If this is all for real, and at the risk of being flamed.... yes, I would say you had a huge part to play in all this mess and add to that, totally and absolutely irresponsible by having unprotected sex numerous times. It leaves me gobsmacked.

[pippy longstocking]

IF ....AND I MEAN A BIG IN CAPITALS... IF ....this is real , your behavior is breath taking .. I actually stopped half way down to be fair , after you slapped him , then had sex , then had more sex ... nah infact I don't believe a word .

[nutbrownhare]

He may well be a douchebag, especially as he continued to have sex with someone that he had perceived, quite rightly, to be unhinged and out of control - YOU!

 

Stop contacting him, preferably before he reports you to the police, and do your best to behave professionally at work.

 

Put this episode behind you and learn from it. That's about all you can do.

[yatsue]

Yes you were at fault for everything because you slapped him first. You could have been in jail if he willed it.

 

However, this post is filled with so much sex sex SEX that I doubt this fling would have lasted much longer anyway. There isn't anything here besides sex. I suggest you lay low with him at work.

[Capricorn3]

Under review.