Ptsd, and babies/gynaecological health

[ButterflyWrists]

Guys, well ladies... I need help. I'm hoping that someone can help.

 

My partner and I want to start a family next year.

But, how on earth do I go for a natural birth? I freak out when things go on down below (strangers/people I don't trust)..

 

I had an abortion earlier this year, and I dissociated through the internal examination (was extremely very early). I don't want to dissociate, or freak out, or not be me. But I also do not want a c section, unless of course it's an emergency.

 

I know a few members have children and ptsd, so I'm really hoping for advice.

 

My gp has told me I have to have a pap smear before getting pregnant, and I guess that would be a step to take in helping get through my issues. The way they do it though hugely freaks me out and I panic.

 

So, please ladies, help!

 

Xx

[Seraphim]

I would recommend EMDR before getting pregnant Butters. It made an immense difference to my PTSD.

[Seraphim]

I had my son though long before treatment for PTSD.

[mustlovedogs]

Out of curiosity, why did you have an abortion?

[melancholy123]

I think you should make yourself as educated as possible about pregnancy in general and birth specifically. You should get as familiar as possible as to what happens during birth so you understand the process. Fear of the unknown is not a good thing in this case. You should understand your options if you need a c section. Ask your doctor every question you can think of and explain your concerns.

[ButterflyWrists]

I've been refused treatment with emdr due to being too complex, as I have ptsd due to fire and this etc.

How did you get through pregnancy vic (can't remember your new names).

 

I had abortion due to not being in any position to have a child, I was in a temporary job, living with my mum, no savings, my partner was living with housemates who have their own family etc. We now live together and have a stable income.

 

I shall research more, I am contemplating if I would be able to have a mental health midwife but seems unlikely considering the state of the NHS

[melancholy123]

I wonder about a midwife especially for a first child when you have no actual experience with giving birth. Should something go wrong you need to go to the hospital. Just my two cents but the first child should be born in a hospital, for safety sake. But if it's a typical uneventful pregnancy perhaps a midwife could work.

[Seraphim]

Hi Butters ,

 

I am surprised they refused you treatment. I have C PTSD and I had EMDR.

 

I loved being pregnant. I wanted a child more than anything. Birth is a very intense experience I don’t think you will disaccociate because you have to be too present.

[mustlovedogs]

I've been refused treatment with emdr due to being too complex, as I have ptsd due to fire and this etc.

How did you get through pregnancy vic (can't remember your new names).

 

I had abortion due to not being in any position to have a child, I was in a temporary job, living with my mum, no savings, my partner was living with housemates who have their own family etc. We now live together and have a stable income.

 

I shall research more, I am contemplating if I would be able to have a mental health midwife but seems unlikely considering the state of the NHS

 

Not a lot of time has passed since your abortion. Just my two cents but if you weren't ready financially then I sincerely doubt you're ready now. I would guess you don't have 6 months of savings for instance. I know this isn't what you asked.

[j.man]

I have PTSD from serving (in the sense it never goes away... it's very well manageable at this point). I wouldn't even consider bringing a child into the world if I weren't confident in it remaining manageable and not having any particularly adverse implications. And as far as any sort of formal plan or treatment to get through the process, that's something to work with a professional over. Beyond folks relating their own experiences, any actual advice we could offer would be irresponsible.

[Seraphim]

I would agree, raising a child when you have PTSD is difficult but very doable with psychiatric support.

[ButterflyWrists]

Thanks all.

My ptsd now only affects me during intimacy (but not every time) and examinations. I do sometimes get the odd external trigger and nightmares, but much more easily managed these days. Even my fire ptsd triggers are more under control.

 

Lots to think about and do before I make this step. Thank you all x