Has she moved on?

[SweetGirl28]

@sweetgirl28 I know she didn't want a conversation. I didn't message her to win her back. I messaged her because she's important and I didn't feel like I'd feel bad if I didn't get a reply.

Now that she replied, I wished I could continue talking.

~feelings~

 

That's why you shouldn't do it, you have to be indifferent towards her. You're not there.

At this rate, you may never be. You're stuck

 

at any rate, if you feel like a good guy for doing it, kudos to you.

[MissCanuck]

Do you think I have done enough now not to contact unless she does next time?[/QUOTE]

 

Yes.

 

She didn't leave an opening to continue the conversation so the ball is in her court now.

[Loveyougirrl]

I am getting restless. I actually felt her love and don't know why she's suddenly developed a cold shoulder to all of this.

I feel like telling her that it's been a month now and I want to talk if she is ready.

[SweetGirl28]

I am getting restless. I actually felt her love and don't know why she's suddenly developed a cold shoulder to all of this.

I feel like telling her that it's been a month now and I want to talk if she is ready.

 

You need to stop obsessing over this girl!

Please distract yourself, or you will stay in limbo.

She won't find the self pity and neediness attractive either, even if she wanted to try again in the future.

[MissCanuck]

I want to talk if she is ready

 

She already knows this, OP. You don't need to send her a reminder.

 

Her silence is your answer - she doesn't want to talk.

[Loveyougirrl]

Update: I messaged her saying she should talk when she's ready.

She replied and said we could get coffee or get on phone. I opted coffee. She told me she'll bring my stuff and asked for hers.

Then she said we could also do the bar we used to go to for dates.

I'm not expecting anything, but I'm happy we will be back to talking terms.

[mustlovedogs]

Update: I messaged her saying she should talk when she's ready.

She replied and said we could get coffee or get on phone. I opted coffee. She told me she'll bring my stuff and asked for hers.

Then she said we could also do the bar we used to go to for dates.

I'm not expecting anything, but I'm happy we will be back to talking terms.

 

Remember - she isn't doing anything wrong. YOU broke up with HER. She doesn't owe you anything. Which means you can't make this meetup about you - that would be selfish.

[Loveyougirrl]

Sure, I get that. I just don't want to talk a lot about the past, apart from what we both currently think.

It's more about how we want to see each other in the future.

[Loveyougirrl]

So I met her. We made out. She said she loves me(started crying), but is confused because of how mean I was at the time of breakup and how I had breached her space. I told her that I love her, care for her, wish we

can patch things (after apologising) and get back. I also told

her my eventual aim is to see her happy, so if she is happy without me, then I am good with that too(only that I will have to cut contact with her for sometime for myself to move on). She left without giving an insight into what's there in the future. She also said we should take things slow. I asked her what being confused meant(I know her ex visited after we broke up and she told me she's going to visit a place for the weekend to meet her friends, which is again where her ex lives), but she didn't have answer.

I don't think of it this way, but my friend who also knows her through me, senses she is stringing me along.

Thoughts?

[MissCanuck]

Honestly?

 

Her ex already being in the picture is bad news. My guess is that they're seeing each other again.

[Loveyougirrl]

I texted her that I want her back only if she is not seeing anyone. Else this relationship ends right here. As

[SweetGirl28]

I texted her that I want her back only if she is not seeing anyone. Else this relationship ends right here. As

 

You should really stop contacting her now.

My guess would be you are just pushing her right into the arms of her ex.

Disappear from her life. If she comes back, it's on her terms, not because you are making demands.

This won't work for you, trust me.

[shessofly]

You should really stop contacting her now.

My guess would be you are just pushing her right into the arms of her ex.

Disappear from her life. If she comes back, it's on her terms, not because you are making demands.

This won't work for you, trust me.

 

I agree. The ball is not in your court. She knows how you feel, now leave it and focus on you.

[Jan2728]

Stop doing this!

She replied to be polite.

No where did she ask leading questions of you to engage conversation.

 

We don't know that she was just being polite. Only she can clarify why she responded.

[Jan2728]

So I met her. We made out. She said she loves me(started crying), but is confused because of how mean I was at the time of breakup and how I had breached her space. I told her that I love her, care for her, wish we

can patch things (after apologising) and get back. I also told

her my eventual aim is to see her happy, so if she is happy without me, then I am good with that too(only that I will have to cut contact with her for sometime for myself to move on). She left without giving an insight into what's there in the future. She also said we should take things slow. I asked her what being confused meant(I know her ex visited after we broke up and she told me she's going to visit a place for the weekend to meet her friends, which is again where her ex lives), but she didn't have answer.

I don't think of it this way, but my friend who also knows her through me, senses she is stringing me along.

Thoughts?

 

I think this is progress. Think positive and give her space to get through her confusion. Don't worry what other people say.

[Jan2728]

I texted her that I want her back only if she is not seeing anyone. Else this relationship ends right here. As

 

Ultimatums don't work now. Give her space to figure out what she wants. Are you trying to put this back together on your terms only? If so that's probably not a good strategy.