arlan23 Posted October 25, 2017 Share Posted October 25, 2017 So my just ex girlfriend cheated on me while doing a hospital nursing placement in regional South Australia. I am in my early 20's and prior to this relationship saw my only other girlfriend (Australian) for 4.5 years , when I moved overseas for 18 months we broke up, because I had chosen a different path to her. She has never disliked me for it and I have never had any strong negative feelings towards her. So my just ex gf is my second girlfriend ( she is Chinese) already I had many short flings while overseas I generally am quite realistic about what will work out to be a valid long-term relationship. I met her in March this year and we started dating in May. She spent a lot of time pursuing me and always had time for me. During the start of our relationship I didn't always pay her the attention she deserved, although I always dropped her at work , picked her up from work (whenever I could take that short break from work which was 80% of the time) and I taught her to drive now she has a license and a car. However I didn't always reply to her messages quickly and when we were not living together I would rarely initiate conversation. I knew that she was pursuing me more than I was her and she considered me a catch or something. She isn't particularly good-looking , but I thought her personality was wonderful and that was the reason I started dating her. Over the last month we grew really close and were living together , her parents who live overseas were preparing to come to Australia and her mum also wanted to buy me a ticket to visit them overseas (I said I would love to go but would buy my own ticket). We had talked about how serious we were , and I said I was serious and had started really paying lots of attention to her. By this time I had also completed accepted the way she looked and started loving her for it. Of course her personality was still the winner. A few days ago she went to shower and we were going to watch a movie so her computer was on my lap. I received a message from a friend she doesn't talk to much via this social media application , and I saw on the message just above it something that seemed suspicious. I scrolled up and read the conversation , turns out while she was doing a two month regional placement (I saw her once every two weeks during that time) she slept with a patient whom came into the hospital and then offered her a lift after work. She stayed at his house. When I discovered this I immediately left the house with only about 30 seconds of talking. I felt really betrayed. The guy was a complete stranger whom she had just met on the day. About 24 hours later I talked to her on the phone and asked her to say everything clearly and not lie. She insisted that she hadn't had sex with him , but had oral sex etc I said just tell me honestly and she insisted that was the case , saying please just believe me. She also said she never contacted him since that day. Yesterday through one of her friends I found out both those things to also be lies. She had sex with him and had continued some dirty conversation for several days prior to cheating on me. On the day that she cheated on me I called her and we talked..... we talked on the phone whilst she was at the guys house... A Guy she has never met before whom lives in regional Australia ... at least 30minute (50km) from the hospital she was doing her nursing placement at. She is even more upset about it than I am , has begged for forgiveness. She told me she has always felt inferior or something , and not good looking and thought I didn't like her because sometimes I wouldn't hold her hand in public and she felt that i kept my distance from her in public. She offered to pay for both of us to go on a holiday and also buy us tickets to go to overseas to visit her parents. My mother thinks she is a nice girl -- and overall she is. But I feel super betrayed by this and don't know if I can forgive it. Especially considering she continued to lie after she was caught. I am her first bf so she doesn't have a history of cheating as such. She was very studious until her early she was 20 and then had a crazy 6 months and then met me. All my friends think I should break up with her and couldn't understand why I was with her in the first place ... but I think they are a little superficial, and only ever judged her by her looks. I run a small tech company , speak fluent Chinese (she is Chinese) and have lots of options , but after meeting my just ex gf I have rarely chatted with any of the girls i use to talk to , I bring her everywhere with me and always leave my phone in our room whilst showering etc. I have been very honest with her. To cover one small detail , in the messages with her friend said don't you really like your bf and she said she does , and that she much rathers sleeping with her bf in bed but a long distance relationship can't overcome feeling horny. She cheated on me on the 8th of September ... I had last seen her on the 1st of sept and next saw her on the 16th of sept... I feel like it was her first opportunity to cheat and that she took it. From her conversation with her friend she talked about the shape of the guys private parts and laughed about it, I feel like she didn't regret it at all and only really regrets it now I found out and have broken up with her. I just want to hear some opinions…. should I just leave her and move on? What drives a girl to do this etc. it is really against her own interest … is self sabotage basically she told her mum and her mum thought I was disgusting and all her friends thought what she did was shameful, I feel bad for her but at the same time I don’t know I can trust her again. I don’t want to shame her , but I am angry and disgusted about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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