is this the right thing to do?

[poole]

so ive posted a few times before..

 

its been almost a month since the break up...ive tryd the NC but failed to complete it... I called her on saturday and we had a awesome chat nothing about the broken relationship just casually talking... sunday I heared she had someone that visits her .dumb me contacted her and asked her about it she just laughed and sayed goodbye putting the phone down. yesterday when trying to call her she didnt pic up but I didnt care...

 

after that I received a text from a mutual friend where she states there is no one els and that I should stop contacting her.

 

thats when I decided im fully going to commit to th NC...all the hurt and emotions is taking me down... in the weeks that past after we broke up I got a clear picture of what my part was in the break up since then iv been seeing a phycologist...I was jealous and this is something I dont know where it came from...so thats a work in progress...the klingyness aswel...

 

all I said to our mutual friend was...its okay I respect her decision and that I know what my part in the break up was...and I didnt go and sit on my back side I did something about it and I wil continue doing so...and that all of the changes and eveything im doing was to show her that im still the one but if its her choice that I leave her and dnt contact her again then I respect it.. and I concluded the message by saying if she doesnt want to enjoy the fruits of the tree she planted then somebody els wil...

 

it wil be tough I know but in me I feel much better after saying that and meaning it...

 

thers just one thing I would like to know... since the break up shes been cold and blocked me out of her life is this typical after everybreak up... and does that mean all hope is lost that she didnt care or love me? i wouldnt mind getting back together in the future will the NC help or wil she aleys be this cold and emotionless

[Cope]

NC helps A LOT. As long as you go through with it completely.

 

I don't know why she is cold but I can guess based on my experience. Last time I was cold like that to an ex is because he wouldn't stop calling after the break up. If I showed any interest, he thought that it was a sign that I was still in to him and still working on the relationship. It took three months and a harsh reply from me for him to stop calling. He called me at 3am in the morning. Yes,cold is what he got.

 

Did she care and love you? Of course she did! She wouldn't be in a relationship with you if she didn't! It's just that sometimes things don't work out. Surely you have broken up before,you probably know how it is.

 

Use this forum to keep up with the NC rule, people here are a tremendous help! Take care and keep us updated!

[anthony275]

I agree with cope. I'm kinda doing it to my ex right now. If I'm not cold and I'm being nice then she thinks that's me working on things. I want the relationship to be over with and this is the only way to do that. As far as the love goes, she probably did love you. That doesn't mean it's still there though.

 

Sometimes things just don't work out. It sucks and we've all been through it. You can try and change and somehow show her but unfortunately she's the only one who really knows if you have a chance still. Continuing to pursue her is a toss up. You'll either end up the hero who gets the girl at the end or the creep who can't let a silly relationship go and just move on.

[poole]

ur insights makes sence and helps alot thank you ... cope im going tru with NC nothings stopiing me this time around...ill keep you guys posted on the progress...