Sanders6127 Posted September 28, 2017 Share Posted September 28, 2017 Hi guys, I'm really struggling at the minute so im just looking for some advice or guidance on what to do. To save this post being overly long, I'll bullet point the background info'. -I met a guy 9 months ago, neither of us wanted a relationship and it was a friends with benefits sort of thing. -He had told me from the start he would be moving to Germany, but he wasn't sure when -I caught feelings VERY quickly but managed to keep them under control -My feelings became too much to keep to myself and I told him I have become attached -He keeps his emotions to himself regarding anything, so it was difficult to know how he felt, e.g. he would shut himself out and isolate himself if anything bad happened or if he became upset. -We carried out with our situation up until now, we were both attached and didnt want to leave. Now, the past month or so things have been different with him. Sex has been incredibly more intimate, without being crude we have been love making, not f******. , we are more affectinate towards one another (I always held back before recently, thinking it was too much), he visits me more often, we buy each other gifts, he is more open with me etc etc. I thought maybe it was just me who noticed these things so I mentioned it one night and he said he felt it too. So I started a conversation on what we are and if he wanted anything more, to which he said he "doesn't see the point" in being in a loving relationship now, as he is moving to Germany in the next 4 months (maybe sooner, maybe a little later). I asked him what would happen if he was staying longer, and he said "of course there would be a point, I'm not saying no for no reason. If I was staying you would have been mine months ago". I would absolutely love to be with him, no matter how much time he has (I would go the distance but he wouldn't), but he has made it clear that he doesn't want that. He doesn't want to get hurt anymore than he already knows he is when he leaves. I pretty much knew from the moment the conversation started that he still wouldn't want anything more, but the way he was talking made me really hope. I am now absolutely devosatted and can't stop crying at the thought of him going I'm starting to fall really hard for him and I would do anything to get more time with him. He said me moving to Germany isnt an option (his family dont know about us, given the situation) so it would cause issues, and there is no chance he will stay. From your perspective, or if this was you.. would you carry on with what you have with him, enjoy the time you have together and be heartbroken again when he leaves, or leave now. I don't know what to do with myself im so upset, I've been trapped in my room for the last 3 days hysterically crying, I haven't been able to eat or sleep. I have already pestered my friends enough with problems Ive had with him in the past so I cant talk to them, and I can't talk to him because he said he doesnt want to talk about it anymore Link to comment
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