MissBee Posted September 26, 2017 Share Posted September 26, 2017 Hi Girls and Guys, I would like your thoughts and opinions on my new bf please. I have been single since 2011 and have recently met a nice attractive guy from meetup.com I met him at a social event and things took off from there. So I have been dating him for about two months now. We do seem to have small arguments which are meaningless from time to time, I think we are compatible and he believes that too, both attracted to each other and the sex is great! But the only slight issue is that he is somewhat ambitious and I am highly ambitious and I believe in working towards goals and doing a vision book for motivation and I have tried to get him to be interested and he just pulls away. He had a serious car accident when he was 21 and he was in a coma where he nearly died. He had to learn how to eat, walk and talk again and I think from that bad accident he has lost all of his self confidence and maybe his interest in work wise. He was at University when all of this happened and he was in his third year doing a Business Degree so he must of had ambition doing that?! He is now aged 33 and I am 32. He works with his father doing building, plumbing and electrician work, he drives a nice car like me but lacks ambition else where. He looks up to his brother in laws quite a lot and they both live in big million pound houses!! He gave me the impression that he owned his own home and actually he doesn't he rents and I asked him if he was self employed and he said yes, I said are you not keeping your receipts? he said no, then I said don't you pay tax? he said no. So that told me he doesn't have three years accounts to be able to buy a house. So I found that quite alarming hoping that he isn't a dreamer. He did recently text me yesterday to say he is going to look into paying for more advertising for his work to get more jobs in. So maybe what I said to him last weekend went in and he listened properly. I told him that he looked up to his family in law members so much and that he shouldn't be impressed with what they achieved, be impressed with what you need to achieve in life. I want to live in a big property and I am hoping that you are not a dreamer like my ex who dreamt of having that lifestyle but not working hard to get it. I said I don't want to be the one paying for everything and you just sit happy. So maybe he has been influenced by me? Other than the squabbles we do get on really well and we have a laugh but the work thing is important to me as I don't want to be the main breadwinner in the relationship. And he has asked me when we go out if I could pay half, I have never really done that in past relationships but that has probably because the men I have dated in the past were much older and had more money. Link to comment
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