Getting dumped after an amazing relationship with someone i truly loved

[Gucchi]

Hey everyone,I wish there could be a way to make you guys feel how am feeling right now. So you could understand how confusing this whole situation has become since the break up.

 

I am gonna start from the beginning and i hope i will not bore you to death.It's quite an interesting story.

 

Am 19 years old and am a very sensitive person but i never show it.I am the type of guy you could have an amazing conversation with regarding anything even life to relationships.

I have read lots of books when it comes to attracting women and keeping a relationship stable.Books like Coach corey waynes How to be a 3% Man and The power of the superior Man.

I have read these books both 12 times as i am in the university of holland and trying to move on with my life after a break up that i think should not have ended this way.

 

I got into a relationship with a girl i never thought i would ever have feelings for. This girl is very depended but also very sensitive. She is more into her feminine core instead of her masculine. That's how most women are.Feminine women are more attracted to more Mascular Men who are/act more manly than they do.

 

I have met this girl many years ago. She is a mutual friend with one of my best friends. One day i decided to call all my buddies and friends to come over to my place to have a good time.

She came also.She was in a relationship with a friend of mine who acted really needy in the relationship and i could sense that she was going to break up with him eventually. So she did.

When she did break up with him i decided to call her up and she was crying and i conforted her telling her everything will be fine and the way i talked to her about it made her really feel that i cared about her. Eventually after some days she went to study in england while i was in cyprus. Every day for 2 months we would call each other every night after her studies to talk about how she felt and how she had so many problems in her life.I decided am not gonna be her emotional tampon and call her every single day until i get friend zoned. I knew how to seduce her and make her smile and laugh while she was so far away from me just by talking into a screen with her. We would talk for 12-15 hours a day for 2 months.We even slept together with our laptops facing each other while web calling. This was amazing because i could totally feel this person caring about me. Although those 2 months she didn't know anything about me because i was the one asking her questions.I realized that this isn't someone that i would spent my life with because she was having so many troubles and was insecure/immature and never experienced a serious relationship.One day i decided to put candles all over my room and make this big heart and i called her and showed it to her and she was so happy to know that i was actually in love with her.she was basicly waiting for me to tell her that i love her.She loved me too.the conversations will go on and on until she came to cyprus.When she did i suprised her at the beach and it was the first time after talking for so long online long distance that i have seen her physically.i was so confident while she was all shy and so into me at the same time.We went out after the beach and went home and had sex.I lost her virginity and after that day she was all over me for months.I didn't take her for granted though, i was always looking at her level of attraction to me. I wrote her a romantic letter which she loved but i was never over pursuing like 97% of men are doing in relationships.I never gave her my power she always gave me hers.i was always there for her even when her grandfather died and she was sick and feeling depressed etc.I was her shoulder to lean on.Before i got in a relationship with her i kissed her cousin and she found out and she got really mad at me.this was before we even were in a relationship or had physical connection.We had this way of think that was Why would we fight?we are here to meet each others needs and help each other.After some days she would try to make me jealous when we went out and i noticed that but i showed that it didnt harm me at all.I did talk to her about it though and she told me that's the way she is and she cant change how she is.I said if you wont change then we cant be together.i love you and adore but if you try to make me jealous it's not worth it.(this is the time i noticed she was really immature and insecure-5months in the relationship).days later she would come over and we would have fun and i even made her dinner and had conversation with her but i noticed she was hiding something. she would not open to me whatever i tried.I never argued with her about it. days later she went to england again for a month for her studies and i found out from her that she took of her clothes infront of my friend during a video call.Both of them claimed that she was depressed and drunk while i don't believe that.this happened 2 weeks before she came to cyprus again. i told her i needed space to think and after a week we got back together again.I started treating her the same as i did in the beginning and everything seemed fine. One night she went out for 4 days to go camping with her cousin and 2 other male friends. Her birthday was coming up so i bought her this very beautiful jewellery and earrings that would fit her beautiful figure so great.5 minutes before i would go by her place to suprise her she came over to my place and told me these words.(I Do not know why am doing this but am sorry i do not feel this anymore as i used in the begging.She had tears in her eyes)i was like okay lets sit down and talk about it.She said she had to go and i started asking her why she started being so cold lately etc.She said i am really bad in relationships and both of us shouldn't have kept our hopes up.i hate that i have to tell you this because you are the only person that made me feel like this.But i cannot lose you.I told her We can't stay friends because i still love her and i never saw her as a friend i always wanted to be with you and feel you and love you and be with you.I cannot stay friends with someone i still love it will be hard for both of us.Then she started crying and i went and kissed her just to see if she would kiss me back.She didn't that's when i knew its over.I told her to have fun and good luck with her life without arguing or looking pissed and she was just staring at me expecting me to beg her to stay. It's sad that it ended like this because we had this amazing connection from the beggining until the end but still she dumped me.

 

3 reasons why she left me might be:

1.I was going to study in holland 20 days after the break up but she also.So she might have thought i would cheat on her although she trusted me from the beggining

2.She found another guy during the 4 days she left with her cousin for camping

3.She felt like i didn't treat her properly as i used to(which i think is bull and i always treated her the way i did in the beggining. Never over pursuing so that she can get bored of me though or acted needy.

 

Her friends told me she went nuts after the break up and that she was thinking about breaking up with me weeks before the break up.This confused me because i was the perfect guy for her.

 

I am now no contact for almost 50 days and she didn't even send me a breadcrumb.i kept my word and am trying to move on but it is hard.I keep myself busy with school/gym/healthy eating having fun as that is most important.You must love yourself so much that others will see how attractive you are.

 

The best way to get someones attention is to remove yours.In my case though i do not know if it was the right thing to do.As i keep looking in the past with rose colored glasses and not think of the negative things.She will be going to england in some days for studies. I still love her and i dont hate her.But she thinks the opposite.Although she hates me for not staying friends.I think she thinks i used her all these months just for sex.I was her first and it was amazing.

 

I am just a 19 year old who likes to give so much love but not in a boring way so that i can make people smile.everyone loves me and my character because i am so masculine but deep inside am a feminine . Thank you for reading this and please comment on what you believe went wrong and if there is a chance of us getting back together.

Her ego is over the roof so she might want to contact me some time but she wont.All the guys she went with were over pursuers etc but i was different.

 

I know everything about her.She knows nothing.that's how i feel right now.

[rosephase]

It sounds like you loved bombed her. Never showed her your real self. Never stopped playing games or attempting to be who you thought she wanted you to be. But it also just sounds like your both 19. She doesn't know what she wants, you don't know how to honestly show up in a relationship and you are probably both to young and inexperienced to get into a long term committed relationship. Your both in school. You are both traveling a lot. You both are exploring who you are, what you want and who you want to become.

 

It sounds like you had a fun, romantic, highly emotional fling, that never really landed in a relationship. You've spent so much time reading books about how to be a male. And how to male correctly at females... that is a bunch of garbage that teaches you to pretend and hide parts of yourself. If you can't be honest about who you are, if you can't stop performing a relationship instead of being in one... well this is going to keep happening. You say "deep inside you are feminine" near the end of your post. That's because you have been fed this really polarized version of gender. That version is keeping you form connecting and really showing up and giving a apart of yourself. Those books didn't teach you how to be a man. Or how to be masculine. They taught you how to play act so hard you can't actually pay attention to who you are, how you feel or what you want. And if you don't know those things about yourself you are going to be horrible at reading those things about her.

[Hollyj]

I copied this, as the red is awful to read:

 

 

Hey everyone,I wish there could be a way to make you guys feel how am feeling right now. So you could understand how confusing this whole situation has become since the break up.

 

I am gonna start from the beginning and i hope i will not bore you to death.It's quite an interesting story.

 

Am 19 years old and am a very sensitive person but i never show it.I am the type of guy you could have an amazing conversation with regarding anything even life to relationships.

I have read lots of books when it comes to attracting women and keeping a relationship stable.Books like Coach corey waynes How to be a 3% Man and The power of the superior Man.

I have read these books both 12 times as i am in the university of holland and trying to move on with my life after a break up that i think should not have ended this way.

 

I got into a relationship with a girl i never thought i would ever have feelings for. This girl is very depended but also very sensitive. She is more into her feminine core instead of her masculine. That's how most women are.Feminine women are more attracted to more Mascular Men who are/act more manly than they do.

 

I have met this girl many years ago. She is a mutual friend with one of my best friends. One day i decided to call all my buddies and friends to come over to my place to have a good time.

She came also.She was in a relationship with a friend of mine who acted really needy in the relationship and i could sense that she was going to break up with him eventually. So she did.

When she did break up with him i decided to call her up and she was crying and i conforted her telling her everything will be fine and the way i talked to her about it made her really feel that i cared about her. Eventually after some days she went to study in england while i was in cyprus. Every day for 2 months we would call each other every night after her studies to talk about how she felt and how she had so many problems in her life.I decided am not gonna be her emotional tampon and call her every single day until i get friend zoned. I knew how to seduce her and make her smile and laugh while she was so far away from me just by talking into a screen with her. We would talk for 12-15 hours a day for 2 months.We even slept together with our laptops facing each other while web calling. This was amazing because i could totally feel this person caring about me. Although those 2 months she didn't know anything about me because i was the one asking her questions.I realized that this isn't someone that i would spent my life with because she was having so many troubles and was insecure/immature and never experienced a serious relationship.One day i decided to put candles all over my room and make this big heart and i called her and showed it to her and she was so happy to know that i was actually in love with her.she was basicly waiting for me to tell her that i love her.She loved me too.the conversations will go on and on until she came to cyprus.When she did i suprised her at the beach and it was the first time after talking for so long online long distance that i have seen her physically.i was so confident while she was all shy and so into me at the same time.We went out after the beach and went home and had sex.I lost her virginity and after that day she was all over me for months.I didn't take her for granted though, i was always looking at her level of attraction to me. I wrote her a romantic letter which she loved but i was never over pursuing like 97% of men are doing in relationships.I never gave her my power she always gave me hers.i was always there for her even when her grandfather died and she was sick and feeling depressed etc.I was her shoulder to lean on.Before i got in a relationship with her i kissed her cousin and she found out and she got really mad at me.this was before we even were in a relationship or had physical connection.We had this way of think that was Why would we fight?we are here to meet each others needs and help each other.After some days she would try to make me jealous when we went out and i noticed that but i showed that it didnt harm me at all.I did talk to her about it though and she told me that's the way she is and she cant change how she is.I said if you wont change then we cant be together.i love you and adore but if you try to make me jealous it's not worth it.(this is the time i noticed she was really immature and insecure-5months in the relationship).days later she would come over and we would have fun and i even made her dinner and had conversation with her but i noticed she was hiding something. she would not open to me whatever i tried.I never argued with her about it. days later she went to england again for a month for her studies and i found out from her that she took of her clothes infront of my friend during a video call.Both of them claimed that she was depressed and drunk while i don't believe that.this happened 2 weeks before she came to cyprus again. i told her i needed space to think and after a week we got back together again.I started treating her the same as i did in the beginning and everything seemed fine. One night she went out for 4 days to go camping with her cousin and 2 other male friends. Her birthday was coming up so i bought her this very beautiful jewellery and earrings that would fit her beautiful figure so great.5 minutes before i would go by her place to suprise her she came over to my place and told me these words.(I Do not know why am doing this but am sorry i do not feel this anymore as i used in the begging.She had tears in her eyes)i was like okay lets sit down and talk about it.She said she had to go and i started asking her why she started being so cold lately etc.She said i am really bad in relationships and both of us shouldn't have kept our hopes up.i hate that i have to tell you this because you are the only person that made me feel like this.But i cannot lose you.I told her We can't stay friends because i still love her and i never saw her as a friend i always wanted to be with you and feel you and love you and be with you.I cannot stay friends with someone i still love it will be hard for both of us.Then she started crying and i went and kissed her just to see if she would kiss me back.She didn't that's when i knew its over.I told her to have fun and good luck with her life without arguing or looking pissed and she was just staring at me expecting me to beg her to stay. It's sad that it ended like this because we had this amazing connection from the beggining until the end but still she dumped me.

 

3 reasons why she left me might be:

1.I was going to study in holland 20 days after the break up but she also.So she might have thought i would cheat on her although she trusted me from the beggining

2.She found another guy during the 4 days she left with her cousin for camping

3.She felt like i didn't treat her properly as i used to(which i think is bull and i always treated her the way i did in the beggining. Never over pursuing so that she can get bored of me though or acted needy.

 

Her friends told me she went nuts after the break up and that she was thinking about breaking up with me weeks before the break up.This confused me because i was the perfect guy for her.

 

I am now no contact for almost 50 days and she didn't even send me a breadcrumb.i kept my word and am trying to move on but it is hard.I keep myself busy with school/gym/healthy eating having fun as that is most important.You must love yourself so much that others will see how attractive you are.

 

The best way to get someones attention is to remove yours.In my case though i do not know if it was the right thing to do.As i keep looking in the past with rose colored glasses and not think of the negative things.She will be going to england in some days for studies. I still love her and i dont hate her.But she thinks the opposite.Although she hates me for not staying friends.I think she thinks i used her all these months just for sex.I was her first and it was amazing.

 

I am just a 19 year old who likes to give so much love but not in a boring way so that i can make people smile.everyone loves me and my character because i am so masculine but deep inside am a feminine . Thank you for reading this and please comment on what you believe went wrong and if there is a chance of us getting back together.

Her ego is over the roof so she might want to contact me some time but she wont.All the guys she went with were over pursuers etc but i was different.

 

I know everything about her.She knows nothing.that's how i feel right now.

[Hollyj]

There wasn't really a really a relationship, as it was so one-sided.

 

You are right, you were her emotional tampon. She is a dramatic, hypocrite who sounds exhausting. I am wondering what you found interesting in this girl, other than playing her armchair psychiatrist.

 

I suggest you look up codependency and make better choices in girls.

 

Lastly, I don't think it was cool for you to go after your friend's ex, after they split. That's terrible.