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Met someone from another city


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I'll keep this as brief as I can. 35-year-old gay guy here:

3 weeks ago I met a guy online. He's from another city (a flight or long drive away) but he was in mine as he grew up here and was visiting parents. We got to chatting and learned we had a ton in common

-same age, good career

-moved around a lot but have lived in a lot of the same places, gone to the same schools, but at different times

-similar interests


Decided to meet. Hit it off. Squeezed in a second date before he left town. Hit it off again. I just bought a new house and he bought me a nice housewarming gift (a nice bottle of rye whiskey, something we talked about on our first date). We had a bittersweet goodbye and a couple of goodnight kisses and parted ways.


He said he'd be back in late October but understood if I didn't want to get tangled up in this. We texted a bunch over the ensuing 24 hours. We talked about additional visits. Then the texts went to a conversation every 2-3 days. At that point I mentioned to him that I wanted to try to see him before late October to see if this would go anywhere- the only weekend we could was this coming weekend. He expressed interest and did a little research on a good half-way point between us. We made tentative plans but nothing confirmed.


Last week he went to Europe for a week with friends for his birthday and I haven't heard from him since he left. I texted him for his birthday yesterday but he hasn't replied. Is he a flake? We've only met twice, so it seems silly to have expectations, especially while he's abroad with friends. I accept that too much communication too soon can be bad, and getting to know each other through legitimate human interactions is far more valuable. He'll be coming back today so hope to hear from him and/or make plans for this weekend. Am I overreacting or am I getting the brush off?

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Wondering if he didn't reply because he was in Europe. I know you get charged more for international texts/calls, so maybe he just doesn't have his phone on? My advice, wait to see if he responds in a day or two. I don't think there's enough here to conclude he's brushing you off. Could just be the circumstance is preventing him from responding to you. When things get so intense so quickly, we rush to extreme reactions. Relax and let's see how the next couple days go. Getting to know someone is supposed to be fun, so have fun and let things progress naturally.

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