Radiate21 Posted September 22, 2017 Author Share Posted September 22, 2017 I just learned that my ex is at an event just a few blocks away from my apartment that I was going to go to tonight. Now I don't know if I should. And I feel so strange being so close to him. Part of me wants to go look for him, how crazy is that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frenchie12 Posted September 22, 2017 Share Posted September 22, 2017 It's not crazy at all to feel that way. I'll tell you what I tell myself in similar situations: Try your best to listen to that rational (if faint) voice in your head that is telling you "NO, DON'T DO IT." And we both know why. It will ultimately only make us feel much, much worse and set us back in the interminable healing process. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radiate21 Posted September 25, 2017 Author Share Posted September 25, 2017 He sent me an entire paragraph-long email last night that was completely impersonal and distant about how he is letting me know that I have a $240 credit for a southwest flight that we were going to take together in a couple of months because he cancelled my portion, and only I can use it. Why on earth would he send me that?!?!? Why would he remind me of our trip, tell me that he's going without me, remind me of the date, he knows money doesn't matter to me this much. Or he would if he had more of a brain. Jesus. I am so upset. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radiate21 Posted September 25, 2017 Author Share Posted September 25, 2017 No matter how hard I try, I can't shake the thoughts that I will never find someone that measures up to him ever again. I feel like I have lost my only chance at something deep and real. I'm worried I'll never trust or feel open and free with anyone else again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reinventmyself Posted September 29, 2017 Share Posted September 29, 2017 No matter how hard I try, I can't shake the thoughts that I will never find someone that measures up to him ever again. I feel like I have lost my only chance at something deep and real. I'm worried I'll never trust or feel open and free with anyone else again. Those thoughts are text book break up thoughts. Someday this will be behind you and you'll meet someone new and think back to how silly it was to worry about it all. Not to minimize how you feel. Most of us feel that way, but it's just the grief talking. Be patient and take care of yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radiate21 Posted October 1, 2017 Author Share Posted October 1, 2017 Thank you. It means a lot. I hope you are right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carus Posted October 3, 2017 Share Posted October 3, 2017 Reinvent* is right. What you are going through is completely normal and will ease up over time. Time does heal but you can help that also by taking care of your health and your income, and staying away from him. It's good for you to take some time to yourself now too rather than looking to fill that void with someone else. That will come a bit later on... 23!? Man, I wish! Your wounds will heal but we can never get those years back* Keep walkin' gorgeous* Carus* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radiate21 Posted October 3, 2017 Author Share Posted October 3, 2017 Thanks, Carus. I wish knowing that this is "normal" helped more than it does. I'm so worried about ending up alone or not surpassing my past relationship. It was the best as it gets. Not sure how people can move on from pain like this. I know, NC and taking care of yourself, keeping busy, but I'm sick of feeling like I'm running on a treadmill and getting nowhere. Like I'm just a zombie doing the motions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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