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Sigh......


Missyg

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After posting in the GBT forum for a few months I suppose I have got to the point where I now need to be posting here.

 

It still hurts 3.5 months later but what hurts more is that there has been nothing from him! I don't know what I did wrong but he just ignored me and I am proud I haven't contacted him in 5 weeks but I think even prior to that he was just deleting my messages!

 

Just one word would be great right now but I doubt I will ever get it!

 

I have been the sad person that I look back over the last 3.5 months and feel that someone has just picked me up from that day and dropped me off where I am! Don't get me wrong I've had moments where I have started to try and change my life for the better but my attention just falters and nothing has changed.

 

I have and most probably will always have this empty feeling in my gut that we are not over but I can't live like this anymore.

 

I don't understand why he is ignoring me yet keeps all lines of communication open! Fb watsapp everything!

But maybe I'm just not ment to understand.

 

I've read a lot of posts all over this site and have yet to see a story where the ex b/f had an amicable split and than suddenly just ignores everything. Every story I read the ex has replied or sent a message.

 

I just don't get it! I keep telling myself to move on he's stupid for what he has done but my head and heart are really not communicating!! So frustrating!!

 

Sorry stupid long post that most probably doesn't make sense!

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Emotions can drive you crazy! I'll tell you one thing...when someone ignores you, for whatever reason, it is all the closure you need to move on. Seriously. I've been in multiple instances where I was interested in a girl and they just flat out ignore my texts. When it's an ex, it pretty much means they are moving on and want no part of the relationship or you. Sucks to accept, but it's motivation to pick yourself up and move on.

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I'm in the exact same position as you and in the same time fram (3.5 months).

 

We broke up and I went NC, aside from an email a couple of days later after the BU, she hasn't reached out at all and I didn't contact her since. It happens. It's how BU's work.

 

I also feel like I'm at day 1 every day and I can't understand how I can still love someone so much, only for it to end like this.

 

I know this isn't particularly helpful, but I'm just saying, you're not alone.

 

For me, every day is still as hard as the first, although I don't cry as much. I keep dreaming about a future with her. I keep hoping she'll be there when I get off work. I keep looking at my cellphone waiting for a signal.

And nothing happens.

 

I know I'm healing, but most of the time it doesn't feel like it.

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Thank you, I am really trying to get my head and heart on the same page and just forget the last 3 years where he has been in my life just gone!

 

But I suppose it takes time! Just annoys me that I feel this way! I know I'm better than this! Just can't get over the hurdle!

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You can't and won't forget the past 3 years and neither will he. It's part of your life and your life's history. However, with time, this pain will start to alleviate. It's just that it takes time. Can't get past a 3 year relationship in just 3 months or even 6 sometimes. Especially if the relationship was happy from your perspective. Just one day at a time and you'll find that you think less about it as it goes. It's like your mind eventually gets tired and bored with grieving the loss and starts to move on.

 

As for him not responding....I mean....it's just how breaking up goes. It may feel like a terrible thing, but really, with 20/20 hindsight you'll realize that it helped you heal and move on faster. It's why people do go NC after a break up. It just helps. Otherwise, talking to your ex is a lot like ripping the wound open over and over again. Every single time you have a good conversation, you end up hoping that maybe things will get better and you'll be back together. Refusing to give you that hope, he really is doing you a kindness.

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Im so jealous of people that say "my ex contacted me after x amount of weeks n/c" haha I think I'm driving my self insane. Didn't help that everyone who knew us were shocked by the break up and still think we will get back together. I just want the motivation to turn my life around and prove to myself I don't need him but I can't find that motivation!! Need a massive kick up the bottom. All areas of my life are a mess right now and the only thing I want to do is sit here and mope over someone that doesn't even have the courtesy to give me a second thought!

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Im so jealous of people that say "my ex contacted me after x amount of weeks n/c" haha I think I'm driving my self insane. Didn't help that everyone who knew us were shocked by the break up and still think we will get back together. I just want the motivation to turn my life around and prove to myself I don't need him but I can't find that motivation!! Need a massive kick up the bottom. All areas of my life are a mess right now and the only thing I want to do is sit here and mope over someone that doesn't even have the courtesy to give me a second thought!

 

This is what I go thru as well. Everyone we know says they're shocked... I am too, but it is what it is. I get jealous of all the my ex contacted me as well but most of those post, don't end up well. I look at it as I'm better off because I keep moving forward. They get pulled back in and the heartache starts all over again for them. You have to make yourself push thru. It sucks, it's hard, but it's what you have to do. You can and will get thru it and as said several times, it just unfortunately takes time...

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Im so jealous of people that say "my ex contacted me after x amount of weeks n/c" haha I think I'm driving my self insane. Didn't help that everyone who knew us were shocked by the break up and still think we will get back together. I just want the motivation to turn my life around and prove to myself I don't need him but I can't find that motivation!! Need a massive kick up the bottom. All areas of my life are a mess right now and the only thing I want to do is sit here and mope over someone that doesn't even have the courtesy to give me a second thought!

 

.....Honestly, I can't think of anything worse or more asinine than an ex suddenly reaching out to me juuuust on that one day when I'm starting to feel better and my mind is somewhere else....ugh....just ugh...... Be careful what you wish for.....like seriously......

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