Metalone Posted September 12, 2017 Share Posted September 12, 2017 I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for 1 year 8 months and the most of the time everything goes great, unless I At the start she told me that she had many guy friends and I told her that's ok just as long as the relationships stay as friends, no overly flirting and no sexual advances. I also need to say that we work together and many of her guy friends, I know or friends of mine know them. She agreed to this but since we have been together several guys have been trying to coerce her into bed, giving her expensive gifts (guy is married), other guy trying to convince her that all American couples swap partners, so it is ok and I must be doing it as well. Another guy heard we got engaged and he told her I was a bad person and shouldn't marry me. He stated the reason why is that I was yelling at a vendor and i am not nice, he made up the story and I had to prove it to her by talking to the vendor with her. I told her she can't have guys like these as friends and she doesn't want to stop. I am confident that she won't do anything with them, but to me it is very disrespectful for her to let this go on and my friends I work with even tell me the stories. Her philosophy is that the guys can say anything just as long as she doesn't have sex with them, so it's ok. The second issue is that she has an ex with two younger kids 4 and 7. Her daily interactions with the ex is like they still have a relationship but are separated. The problem is that she protects him over me, when I repeat anything negative about him that she told me, she jumps to his defense stating how good he is. When he talks to her, he dictates how she should act as a mother and as a person, she just listens as if he is in charge or her. When it comes to the kids, if she has them, he will call her to ask how are the kids when he knows they are in school and she does the same when he has them. There are several additional reasons why there relationship makes me uncomfortable - when we started dating, she told me that she waited for him to come back to her for 1 year 9 months, but gave up and started dating me, once I was walking with her holding her hand, and he was coming to drop off the kids, she saw him and pulled her hand from mine and moved away from me - I asked her why she did that and she just said she didn't know why. I told her that it appears she still loves him, she told me she loves only me? Thank you for the help. I love her very much but these problems are very difficult. Link to comment
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