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Who Ghosted Who?


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over the summer my work friends tried hooking me up with a co worker. I never really noticed this girl before, she was always there for me, but I always viewed her as an acquaintance or low tier friend, never saw her as a potential lover. So she asked me out, and I said yes because I had no reason not to. But the problem is that she thought we're dating, boyfriend and girlfriend. I thought we're casually hooking up, going on individual dates to see if we're good and compatible for each other. So we go on our first date, and it's a bore. She has me meet her at her second job and we walk around looking at stuff. At first it was random cheesy decorations that said like "you are my world" or "I love you to the moon and back". Then we look at furniture, then cooking supplies, then shoes, then clothes, and we really don't talk much. We're both introverts, but mainly because she kept her distance from me and kept moving away because she was actually working. I didn't want to interrupt her job, so I left to get a drink of water, slipped out, and went home to eat dinner. Throughout the car ride and while eating she called me like 37 times though. When I finally picked up she said I forget something at the store, so I went back to pick it up. She brings me into a changing room and asks for a kiss. I never received a chance like that before so I kissed her, even though I didn't really like her or know anything about her. But we both kinda like the kiss and keep going. This escalates and a few more dates later the two of us end up having sex in this store while she's on the job. At his point we aren't exactly dating or in a relationship, but we're defiantly more than friends, and she's head over heels in love with me. After our first time she keeps calling me for more sex, and we continue to at the store because she refuses to do it at her house and mine. But eventually I needed to leave for college, and I told her where I was going and everything. For the first couple of weeks she constantly calls me; but most of those times were during class, so I just never picked it up. The few times I did talk to her though I explained that she called while I was in the middle of class. But this keeps happening and I'm unable to answer her calls. Eventually she stops calling, which is unlike her, so I decide to head back home and check on her. When I get back though I'm unable to find her, the 5 days that I'm home I was unable to find her at either of her jobs, and when I contacted her friends they said that they will try to contact her. But I feel as though she ghosted me and just disappeared. So what I want to know is who ghosted who. And if there may have been any reason's for ghosting.



as a side note, I should probably inform you that she doesn't own a cellphone, and her family doesn't own a home phone. She would only contact me through her work numbers, so I was unable to call her back or I would get "Hello, thank you for calling [company name], how may I help you?".

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Let me clarify better, I never stuck my inside her. The furthest I went was eating her out. So technically I am still a virgin, and as far as this relationship is, I am considering myself single because I can't contact her. And I really don't have much luck with asking girls on dates; I believe I said this first, but this was a situation that my friends set me up with. They set me up with a girl and I happened to go on a date and do stuff. At the moment I am in college and I am focusing on classes rather than girls like I did over the summer. The question I have though is did I end up ghosting her or did she ghost me.


does that help clarify stuff? sorry if I sound contradictory to my previous post. I don't fully understand the whole "virginity" concept or why it even exists.

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No ghosting here -just people trying to get in contact and playing phone tag. If she was really interested in being reached/contacted she'd have more than her work phone available. It might be she does have a cell phone and chose not to give you the number -you don't know that. If she has set things up to make it that difficult to contact her then I don't think she's available to date you anyway. I'd move on.

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