Am I overanalyzing or is he not enthusiastic to see me?

[thorough]

So today my bf came home from vaca pretty early in the morning. I had work, so he said he hoped he was done by the time I was done. Come the end of my shift, I only hear from him 2 hours later w/no anything about getting together. Several hours later, same messaging, but no mention of getting together. I have been w/so many disinterested guys that I'm really disappointed, even my mom thinks its strange, not that he may have things to do, but the fact he hasn't updated me on when he will be free. Thoughts? Am I being overly emotional? I really missed and according to him he missed me as well, though his actions show that he didn't. What worries me is that it is getting late in the day as well, so time is ticking, plus other then today I prob won't see him till the weekend due to our schedules.

[rosephase]

Have you asked to see him? Is there some reason you don't just tell him you would like to see him?

 

Use your words. They work a lot better then anxiety. Ask him what's up... not your mom.

[thorough]

Have you asked to see him? Is there some reason you don't just tell him you would like to see him?

 

Use your words. They work a lot better then anxiety. Ask him what's up... not your mom.

 

Thing is in the past, guys did things for me because I asked, not because they wanted to do whatever it was. Eventually I found out they weren't interested in me. The ball is in his court, I believe if he truly missed me, he would be the one taking action to see me. I gave him the time I would be free and green light to see me because I have no plans.

[rosephase]

Thing is in the past, guys did things for me because I asked, not because they wanted to do whatever it was. Eventually I found out they weren't interested in me. The ball is in his court, I believe if he truly missed me, he would be the one taking action to see me. I gave him the time I would be free and green light to see me because I have no plans.

 

I promise using your words will work better in the long run. Playing games is a silly waste of time for everyone. Those guys didn't leave because you asked them for things. They left because they weren't interested. And this guy isn't those guys. SO what do you want? Do you want to see him? Or do you want to sit there and get bitter? Because setting traps is how you'll end up really bitter really fast. If you ask and he says "naw, I don't really need to see you today" then at least you'll know.

[thorough]

I promise using your words will work better in the long run. Playing games is a silly waste of time for everyone. Those guys didn't leave because you asked them for things. They left because they weren't interested. And this guy isn't those guys. SO what do you want? Do you want to see him? Or do you want to sit there and get bitter? Because setting traps is how you'll end up really bitter really fast. If you ask and he says "naw, I don't really need to see you today" then at least you'll know.

 

Yes those guys did leave me cause they didn't want to be w/me, but by telling them what I wanted, they were able to lead me on longer. Had I let them act the way they would have, I wouldn't have been w/them as long as I had. I do want to see him, I want him wanting to see, not because I asked again.

[rosephase]

Yes those guys did leave me cause they didn't want to be w/me, but by telling them what I wanted, they were able to lead me on longer. Had I let them act the way they would have, I wouldn't have been w/them as long as I had. I do want to see him, I want him wanting to see, not because I asked again.

 

eh. You've made up your mind.

 

Sit with your trap and see what happens. I hope for your sake it works out.

[j.man]

I mean the dude just came back this morning. Why not let him wind down before setting him up for a no-win situation?

 

Also, I know rosephase touched on it, but seriously don't gripe to your mom about dudes. On the, frankly, extreme off-chance you snag yourself and hold onto a good and healthy man willing to play your games, you're pretty much sabotaging him should you two get to the point it's important for him to establish a positive relationship with her.

[thorough]

I mean the dude just came back this morning. Why not let him wind down before setting him up for a no-win situation?

 

Also, I know rosephase touched on it, but seriously don't gripe to your mom about dudes. On the, frankly, extreme off-chance you snag yourself and hold onto a good and healthy man willing to play your games, you're pretty much sabotaging him should you two get to the point it's important for him to establish a positive relationship with her.

 

I ended up contacting him and asking. I wasn't setting him up for a no win. Actually in the past I had unhealthy relationships because I communicated what I wanted. This wasn't a test, I wanted to see him and I didn't tell him that I wanted to see him just to see how he would respond.

[mustlovedogs]

What did you say?

[figureitout23]

How long have you two been dating? What's your typical pattern? Concidering the fact that you two are in a relationship and not just casually dating it is odd he hasn't said anything to you about seeing one another. I don't think there's anything wrong with you speaking up though

 

Casually dating? I'll see you when I see you. Relationship? There should be open communication about when you will see one another.

[DanZee]

So you both have busy schedules. He just got in from travelling early in the AM and he's got things to do (including sleep), and you wanted to see him, but you didn't want to tell him you wanted to see him, you just hoped he was going to guess that you wanted to see you and come over, and he didn't come over. And now you want to break up with him. And he took 2 whole hours to respond to your texts. And we're not even talking about an entire day going by here. Hmm. I think I know why your previous relationships didn't work out.