puppylove2 Posted August 28, 2017 Share Posted August 28, 2017 There's a lot to this story but I will attempt to summarize. I've been dating this guy for about a year and a half now. I met him when I was just getting out of a pretty toxic relationship, and he was like my knight in shining armor. He was sweet, romantic, respectful and reminded me of what a good relationship should be like. I fell head over heels...fast. We bonded over an intense love for music and animals. As the months went along, I started to see his angry side. He was insecure and had jealous tendencies. He had horrible road rage. He bragged about the idea of hurting people. He has never been the least bit violent towards me however. And for someone who claimed to love animals, he didn't act that way. He would scream and spank his own large dog over hardly anything...even biting her to show dominance. This made me incredibly upset. I confronted him about it several times. He's gotten better with it. Again, I stuck around because he never directed his anger at me. Skipping ahead. I just bought a house and we moved in together. He's made a lot of positive changes to get his sh*t together so we can have a good future. He is still an angry person but has definitely improved, he's gotten better with managing his finances, and just started back to school to pursue a degree. Though sometimes I feel like he makes decisions only to please me and my parents (who aren't fans of him), rather then because it's what he wants. His angry tendencies are starting to affect me. I find myself feeling angry in situations where I would've never felt that way before I met him. Before moving in together, we tried to introduce our dogs. My little chihuahua didn't react well to his huge dog. Even though it broke my heart, I put my boyfriend first and left my dog behind with my parents. A couple of days ago, I came across a super sweet little tiny rescue dog that was up for adoption. She had been through so much...was found darting in between cars, covered in matts and ticks. My boyfriend came along to see her and was so sweet to her at first. She loved everyone. So I bought her home. We attempted to introduce his dog to the new one. Things were great for about 5 minutes, until his dog stood over the new one. The little one felt threatened and showed her teeth. Didn't growl, didn't nip...just tried to communicate that she needed space. Ever since then, my boyfriend has been nothing but cruel. The past few days have been horrible. He's stayed in a separate room because he doesn't want my sweet little ball of fluff around his 60lb dog. He told me I never asked if he was okay with getting her, even though he was there when I did...and acted as though he loved her. He angrily told me not to get attached. He now refuses to give her any attention, calls her horrible names, and glares at her until she barks or growls. Then acts as though she's the one with anger problems. She has never growled at anyone else. I know she is picking up bad vibes from him. This is a side to him I've never seen. It has to be jealously. The dog is just the top of the iceberg. At this point, a future with my boyfriend seems like a horrible idea. He made me so happy at first...but mostly unhappy as of late. Building a life with someone who can get SO angry at just a tiny rescued dog...what would he like with kids? I feel bad because he has made so much personal progress. He is so attached to the idea of a future with me, and marrying me...splitting up is going to be devastating for him. I've told him that he needs to take his dog and leave for a few days. He claimed I was choosing the new dog over him and his. That isn't even close to the problem. If you were in this relationship...would you keep trying to make it work? What would you do? I've thought about counseling but I don't even know if there's a point...I don't know what to do. Link to comment
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