We both like each other but... girl code

[Help1100]

Hey guys basically to make a long story short I went on a night out and ended up kissing this girl who everyone thinks likes/liked me. Nothing has happened since and since then I have been talking to one of her mates for the past 3 months. We have both told each other how much we like each other but she says she feels guilty going behind this other girls back because she might still like me. I'm basically madly in love with this girl and I feel like I'm losing my mind. We have both tried to back off from each other but failed miserably. I see her at work all the time so it's difficult. We used to message each other for 6 hours most days into the early hours. Now she hardly ever messages me but she claims how much she misses me and likes me, I feel like she might not be interested anymore or is talking to another guy I just don't know the reason because when I ask her if I'm being annoying or to much she just says no she's just busy. I've also asked her if I ever have a chance with her because I don't want to be strung along like this, and she said maybe in time. I don't know what to do because I'm crazy about this girl I think about her all the time I feel like I'm going absolutely mental and I hate it. should I just let her go and ignore her completely or do I hang in there until she feels like she's no longer going behind her friends back. I don't know how much longer I can continue hoping and hanging on like this.

[Hollyj]

Why won't she have a chat with her friend? Are you i communication with the first girl?

[indea08]

Just because you kissed one of her friends one time on a night out does not mean you're off limits..? Now if you'd had a year long relationship with this friend, that'd make you off limits, but to assume this friend has claim over you for one kiss is ridiculous. Either this friend of hers is a psycho, or this girl is using this as an excuse not to date you.

[Help1100]

Why won't she have a chat with her friend? Are you i communication with the first girl?

 

I told her to do this but she said it's different for girls and everyone would hate her for it . Also I see the other girl at work but we barely talk. I work with both of them

[Help1100]

Just because you kissed one of her friends one time on a night out does not mean you're off limits..? Now if you'd had a year long relationship with this friend, that'd make you off limits, but to assume this friend has claim over you for one kiss is ridiculous. Either this friend of hers is a psycho, or this girl is using this as an excuse not to date you.

 

Exactly I keep telling her this. I have even gone to the lengths of telling the girl I kissed that nothing will ever happen between us and it was just a one off etc. It's basically made it very awkward between us because we used to be good mates but now she kinda just blanks me. I don't understand why she would be telling me how much she likes me and misses me and wants to spend time with me. And then would come up this this stupid excuse not to date me. I'm having such a hard time figuring out if she's just leading me on. It really messing with my head. Since posting this I have given her an a choice of we see each of and see how it goes or we just leave it I'm not being strung along anymore. I don't know if this was the right thing to do and could ruin my chances but I can't take waiting much longer

[boltnrun]

You work with both of them?

 

Yeah, that's messy.

 

Isn't there anywhere else you can meet girls?

[Hollyj]

I told her to do this but she said it's different for girls and everyone would hate her for it . Also I see the other girl at work but we barely talk. I work with both of them

 

That's not true. Sounds like an excuse.

[Help1100]

You work with both of them?

 

Yeah, that's messy.

 

Isn't there anywhere else you can meet girls?

 

Yeah there's other places but I've fallen for this girl pretty hard that's why I'm in such two minds about it. I tried having a conversation with her tonight to try and get some answers. She said she genuinely likes and wants to spend time with me then when I asked what's stopping her (because I've basically proved this other girl isn't interested in me now) it resulted in her saying she was driving so will message me in a sec and I haven't heard back since. That was over an hour ago so I'm thinking it I'm not having this she's messing with my head too much.

[Hollyj]

Yeah there's other places but I've fallen for this girl pretty hard that's why I'm in such two minds about it. I tried having a conversation with her tonight to try and get some answers. She said she genuinely likes and wants to spend time with me then when I asked what's stopping her (because I've basically proved this other girl isn't interested in me now) it resulted in her saying she was driving so will message me in a sec and I haven't heard back since. That was over an hour ago so I'm thinking it I'm not having this she's messing with my head too much.

 

She is messing with you. You shouldn't have to beg people to be with you.

 

I would be done with this.

[boltnrun]

Well, if this doesn't work out, please do not try to date any more girls from work! Two former crushes/casual encounters is enough awkwardness.

[mustlovedogs]

No need to become the company bicycle. This most recent girl may be worried about getting a reputation because of you.