jo1992 Posted July 28, 2017 Share Posted July 28, 2017 I'm writing this message in the hope that someone can help me. I can't talk to any of my girlfriends about this situation because none of them can relate to my situation. I genuinely feel so lost. I'm a 24 year old girl and I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years - he is French from southern France and I'm from London. I had a great career in London and we met on holiday in Spain.. I was on a girls holiday and he was with all of his guys. We fell for each other straight away and were inseparable ever since. We did long distance for 1 year - with him travelling to London every month and myself to southern France alike, until a year and a half ago when we decided we HAD to be together. Him moving to London wasn't an option because he has a gorgeous 9 year old daughter here, so I upped my life in London, found a good job in my field (marketing), learnt French and now here I am. I love him so much and I honestly feel that he could be the one, but I miss my life in London so much - my girlfriends, my mum who is my best friend, the buzzy life style, money. I don't feel like the southern French life is for me and I had almost made a 70% decision to move home.. until last week when my boyfriend's mother died suddenly of a heart attack. He is absolutely devastated. He lost his dad when he was only 18 years old and now he feels like his life just has no meaning. All I want to do is help him and to make him feel better but I feel so helpless. The worst part is that I have an amazing job offer back in London (as I was interviewing the last few months just to measure my worth on the market if I decided to move home).. I am SO STUCK on what to do. There is no way I can turn around and tell him now that I'm moving back to London for a new job, but I don't know when another opportunity like this will come around.. and I also love him so much, I'm so angry at the world for the fact he can't move to London with me. I feel to torn and almost trapped. My friends tell me that London is too crowded, expensive, rainy and the quality of life in southern France is so much better and I know that.. but now I miss my own mother more than anything and I want to hold her close and raise my family in the same country as her. I feel so evil that I have realized this as a result of his own mother dying.. but it really has made me realize that family is everything. Southern France also doesn't have the same opportunities as London, especially in my field. I'm so driven and motivated and I want to excell in my career. This job offer will seriously be a huge step for my career, southern France is very much more chilled with very limited opportunity to make a lot of money. Not that money is all that matters, but here I feel so secluded from everything that is important to me. My family, my friends, my support network.. I gave up everything to be here with him .. my friends, family, support network, my good salary. I don't know what to do.. because as I said I love him with all my heart. He is supportive, caring and loving. Would I ever meet someone like him again? I adore him so much and the thought of being with anyone else makes me sick. But I'm tired of France. I find the English much more friendly, I'm tired of living further away from the city which makes it difficult to see friends and socialize in the evenings because I can't get anywhere without a car.. and moving nearer the center isn't an option for him because he needs to be near where his daughter's mother lives. I also panic knowing that as I'm nearly 25, I would be approaching the age where most of my girlfriends back home are getting engaged with their boyfriends and I start all over again.... I don't even want to be thinking about these horrible things when I love my boyfriend so much!! I feel so torn Any advice would honestly be so appreciated Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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