Advice on going on vacation with a lady friend

[mrsmith76]

When talking to this lady friend she said about going on on a week vacation with her Mother to San Francisco and I said that would be an awesome trip after she told me about it and said how I wish I could go not thinking she would invite me.

 

She is asking now about going and if I want to go with them to the entire tour with them or fly in later for part of it. I said I would need to check with my work schedule which I am sure I can get off if I wanted.

 

This would be all great though we use to have something a bit more than a friendship many years ago and it didn't turn out so great that we didn't even talk for over a year and finally I forgave her and we became just friends, I don't really have any interest in starting any relationship with her, I know she talk about how we should date though I just don't feel that way anymore. I feel this would give her the wrong idea.

 

Is this a bad idea to go with her on a trip? If I decide to not go what is the best way to tell her? Maybe say with my work schedule that I don't I can make it but I appreciate the offer?

[SherrySher]

Yes, this would most definitely give her the wrong idea, especially seeing as she wants more. It will bring her hopes up and make her think you and she are entering into a more close relationship being as this involves her and her mother.

 

She will be hoping that it means you will end up being her boyfriend.

Just tell her you are sorry, but your work schedule won't allow it especially with it being summertime and no one to cover shifts.

[SillyKate]

Not the best idea I guess... It may turn out awkward.

[DancingFool]

Since she has expressed an interest for more than just friendship, this would definitely be a bad idea.

 

Plus sounds like it's a mother/daughter trip.....so could be very awkward indeed with either you being kind of a third wheel or this turning too much into one happy family deal, where you find yourself thrust into a bf/quasi hubby type position. The potential for awkwardness is pretty much unlimited here. I'd bail out and tell her you can't go but appreciate the offer.

[mrsmith76]

I put some thought into this and decided the best thing is not to go with her and her Mom on the trip, it seems to be for the best, I told her that someone already scheduled time off and not enough support at work then and that I appreciate the invite to come with.

 

Thank you everyone for the advice, it helped me make the best decision