Girl i was dating who seemed really into me has ended things

[Paulks2017]

I had known this girl for about a year an half, but we only started dating recently as we were seeing other people. We started dating a couple of months back and for the past 2 months it has been really good, we seemed to get on really well and she seemed to be really into me. We hung out quite often, went on days out, and were very frequent at txting and calls. She used to instigate alot of the communication and ask if i was going to see her. She talked about me to her friends and family and put pictures of us and our days out on Facebook/Instagram etc……I had known previously that she had been in some really bad relationships and had been treated really badly, so i was always willing to be patient with her and just go with it to make her relaxed and comfortable. When we were out places or doing things she was really open, chatty and affectionate but some of the time when we were at her house she would be more closed off and seemed to have more of a wall up in that sense..

About 3 weeks back she mentioned that she felt that she had a wall up because of her past relationships and that she didnt think it was right that she would sometimes be moody with me and not affectionate. I explained that it was normal and tried to reassure her and that was that. Fast forward to last sunday, i had been away for the weekend with family. She asked to see me when i got back so we chilled at mine she even said she missed me…..a bit later on she messaged me saying she needed to talk about her feelings and that she felt it was unfair on me and that she didnt think she was right for me. She suggested having a week off so she could relax as she felt it was a bit overwhelming. We talked a little the following days….got to wednesday and she suggested going for a walk so i said ok because its what she wanted, she wanted to see me. We had a nice walk and i went back to hers for a coffee, before i left she asked for a a cuddle. A few hours later i got a message saying that shes really sorry, she doesnt want to hurt me but she doesnt feel its working, no "Spark", doesnt feel right etc... I have been in enough relationships and dating to know when someone doesnt like you or doesnt have feelings for you, there was no real signs from her. She never pulled away, or stopped talking to me. I made it known that i was pissed off and angry as it came as a suprise. so i didnt speak to her for a few days. I mistakenly drunk txt her one night to which she replied straight away to some of the txts....so i laid it out on the line about how i felt about her...Silence, No reply. After a couple of days of no reply i txt saying i need to come and get my things, so when i got there she would hardly speak to me, acted like she didnt really know me and wouldnt look at me in the eyes for any amount of time really. I messaged her later on that day when i left and asked why she seemed pissed off at me and she said it was because i had a go at her for ending things. Not spoken since....WHAT TO DO? WHATS GOING ON WITH HER? WAS SHE LEADING ME ON FOR ATTENTION AND SO SHE WASNT ALONE? .....Ask if you want more information.

 

Thanks,

Paul.

[shessofly]

You drunk text - she's silent.

You go get your things - she barely acknowledges you.

You text again and she tells you she's pissed at your reaction when she broke up.

 

What to do? I think it's time to stop trying to contact her, and let her go her own way. She tried but figured out pretty quickly that she wasn't so into it. You can't force these things and she's been quite unresponsive since breaking up with you so I would leave her be.

[Paulks2017]

Thanks Shesofly .....What i dont understand is, it was only a couple of weeks back she wanted to book a getaway together, when i came back from my trip last week she said she missed me, when we took our dogs on a walk last Wednesday she was really happy that they got on together and suggested we buy a bed so that my dog could stay at her house at some point (might not seem a big deal but when people make or suggest future plans, it means they can see the relationship/dating going on for a while longer) ....Confuses the hell out of me!!

[No1]

Paul, you are trying to make sense of everything that has happened. You are trying to answer all of your questions, but the more you answer, the more questions you have.

 

This is not what you want to hear, but this is the best answer that will answer everything. She lost interest and doesnt want to date you.

 

No need to ask why, she just lost interest.

 

Its okay, it happens. She is not the one for you, there is someone out there that is. Dont cry over her, she will be fine and date another guy. Say that its okay she lost interest and find someone else that does want to date you.