Parents forcing me into medicine

[Findingnemo94]

Hi

 

I have been pressured and controlled by my parents my whole life. been at uni for 5 years now and still havent got a career sorted (long story) but I have decided i want to go into the police or armed forces. My parents however have this crazy idea stuck in their head that I need to go and do post-graduate medicine. I did apply because they made me and I didn't even want to do it but somehow passed the interviews and tests and got a position on the course starting in september. They bullied me into accepting it and I have about 8 days before I can reject the offer (ties into funding etc).

 

Last night I told my parents (after numerous times of already doing so) that I am rejecting the offer and I Don't want to do it. My dad immediatley said the house was going up for sale and they are leaving and not telling me where they are going and i'm going to have to start finding a new place to live. My dad then continued to go on about how I am throwing my life away by not taking a 'secure job offer' and i'm being an idiot. He then told me to ' off' out of the house and he couldn't give a flying where I went. A lot of other things were said including the fact that he wishes he never had a child because I am such a dissapointment.

 

My mum didnt really say anything because she's so controlled by him despite saying 2 days ago in a conversation it was fine and I need to just find something else to carry me over until I do find a job I want to do long-term. My dad told me to get out of the house so i packed all my stuff and put it in the car ready to stay at a friends. He then stole my car keys and said Im not taking my car (my mum is also insured on the car) and that I am to get a taxi. I then rang a taxi and went to leave but I realised by passport and purse were no where to be found. This happens nearly every other week and I am so frightened of him I don't know what to do. I know I am 22 but my job isnt stable enough to rent a flat with. I am trying my best to find something stable enough to move out with. Literally talking to them is like talking to a brick wall he will not listen to anything I say. He will not 'come around' eventually. There is no reasoning with him he is an unreasonable old man who says horrible things to me and I get so stressed sometimes I dont even eat and throw up.

 

I don't know what to do. I know someone is going to say I am 22 and I need to get my own life but I just don't have the income right now to move out is there anything else anyone can think of because I can't bear it anymore I am made to feel worthless constantly.

[melancholy123]

Your dad sure over reacted about your decision to not pursue medicine. Too bad your mother won't stand up to him. You were prepared to leave in your car and then in a taxi, so you must have had somewhere to go at that point. Do that again, go stay where you planned to go the first time and get yourself out of that house. Your father is an abusive bully. Get a job to help pay the rent and then apply to whatever school you want to go to and apply for assisted housing as unis have access to lower cost rentals for students. Time for you to move on and make your way in life. Staying at home isnt going to get you what you want.

[DanZee]

I just read this. You've got to move out. Place an ad on Craigslist or answer some ads for people looking for roommates. Or sign up with the military and if they enlist you, throw your stuff in storage and go where you're assigned. Those are the quickest ways you can get out of your parent's house. And then you never have to look back.