No contact is driving me crazy/ I can't stop thinking about her.

[Jamie242]

About 2 months ago my girlfriend of just under 4 years ended it with me out of no where. Her family didn't see it coming, my family didn't see it coming, her friends, my friends, and our mutuall friends didn't see it coming. To quickly sum up why it ended I found out after arguing about why it was ending after 4 years I've come to find out life became to stressful for her to be able to handle being with me (that being said we moved home cause her parents got sick, then I had a medical issue that required me to be off work for the past 4 months. So it was stressful but we were getting through it together as a team). I was planning on purposing to her at Christmas and quite literally had a talk with all my friends a week before the break up about if they felt I was doing the right thing. They all agreed I had my life partner. She was my best friend in the whole world. Since the breakup I've been told to have NC but because we lived together for 2.5 years there's things that still need to be addressed for assets and what not. Nothing to major but stuff still needs to be sorted out. I guess my issue is I'm not over her at all and who would be after nearly 8 weeks? But when people ask me "how are you doing" if makes me really think and I'm not fine, I'm actually losing my mind. And I'm completely shattered. And then I want to message her and express how I'm feeling but can't. And it sucks so bad. When I hear almost any music off my iTunes or iPhone there's a story behind it for us because we love music and all the same types of music. I just wish I never had to feel this way ever again.

[MissCanuck]

I'm sorry you're so hurt, OP. 2 months out of a 4-year relationship is very little, so the pain is still very fresh. All of those reminders still cut deeply, but they will cut less deeply over time.

 

Having ended a couple of long-term, live-in relationships myself over the years, I would advise you to sort out the logistics of separating property and assets as soon as possible. Having that hanging over your head is making it all worse. Yes, it will be painful to do so. But it needs to be done.

 

As for why she broke it off, well, it says a lot that prefers to go through stress alone than with you. Marriage would not have worked well if her feeling was that she needs to be away from you rather than tough it out together. There are probably other reasons behind it, but it might not be easy for her to articulate exactly why her feelings have changed. How old are you both?

[Jamie242]

25 years old each. And you're right everything is still very fresh. We've been through stressful situations together, my parents went through a divorce while we were away and I have 3 younger brothers. I needed a hip surgery at the. Beginning of last year and she took care of me as well as all finances for a few months. So we've been through stressfull times I just think it became to much.