Jennifer weave Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 Why is it guys refuse to admit they're seeing someone just weeks after a break up? I'm sure women are guilty of this, too. If THEY broke up with you, what's the harm in saying, "yeah... I'm seeing someone. I hope the same for you?" Why lie? Albeit, it doesn't really matter, and it's none of the dumped's business..... but, if you're on good terms, what's the big deal? Then.... they get caught red handed, and "ghost" you.... lol. Lies always come back... best to just be truthful, even though they don't owe you anything after the break up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shessofly Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 It's one of the pitfalls of staying in touch after a breakup. They probably don't want to be questioned by their ex about their new relationship. I've not experienced this situation. I've never maintained contact after being dumped. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clio Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 There are multiple possible explanations imo. 1. Being afraid of possible conflict/drama hence the ghosting afterwards. 2. Fear of hurting the dumpees feelings. 3. Wanting to keep around the dumpee as plan b in case they change their minds or things don't work out with the new person. 4. Being afraid that the dumpee may try to ruin their new relationship. 5. All or some of the above. If they ghosted then they are avoidant. Whatever the reason, they were not worthy of staying in touch to begin with. You lost nobody special. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cococly Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 I am still recovering from a 3.5 yr relationship. Let me tell you, unless you know you are fully healed, do NOT let your ex or ask your ex about anything personal , ie. Relationships. Heck, what's the point if you know they got engaged only a couple of months into their relationship? Would that make you feel better? Nope! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regulardudeguy Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 Ignorance is bliss surely. I'm confident my ex will be in relationship soon and it will hurt me to know. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doc Blaze Posted July 14, 2017 Share Posted July 14, 2017 I would rather not know. I know nothing that my ex is up to right now and it feels awesome.. obviously when she finds someone , it will slightly hurt but I chose not to know anything as much as possible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
74Grfs5 Posted July 17, 2017 Share Posted July 17, 2017 I told me ex it was non of my business who he starts dating (he dumped me). He then went into great detail telling me about his dates he had been on. Then i get a text at 2am from him telling me he is "very very happy with his new gf, besotted, comitted and in love" he left me unblocked for about 10 hours waiting for a response....he didnt get one so blocked me again! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer weave Posted July 17, 2017 Author Share Posted July 17, 2017 I told me ex it was non of my business who he starts dating (he dumped me). He then went into great detail telling me about his dates he had been on. Then i get a text at 2am from him telling me he is "very very happy with his new gf, besotted, comitted and in love" he left me unblocked for about 10 hours waiting for a response....he didnt get one so blocked me again! He sounds like a psychopath!!! I guess I'm in better shape with the, "silent treatment." I already know the truth, and it makes no difference. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
74Grfs5 Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 He sounds like a psychopath!!! I guess I'm in better shape with the, "silent treatment." I already know the truth, and it makes no difference. Ha ha psychopath!!! Love it!!! He is just plain nasty rubbing my face in it like that! "Very very in love" "really really happy" i think its BS! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer weave Posted July 18, 2017 Author Share Posted July 18, 2017 Ha ha psychopath!!! Love it!!! He is just plain nasty rubbing my face in it like that! "Very very in love" "really really happy" i think its BS! Yeah..... he's miserable..... My ex on the other hand? Happy as a clam... but guess what? There's only one me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
74Grfs5 Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 He sounds like a psychopath!!! I guess I'm in better shape with the, "silent treatment." I already know the truth, and it makes no difference. Yeah..... he's miserable..... My ex on the other hand? Happy as a clam... but guess what? There's only one me. I thought the OTT repetatative words of extreame happiness were a sign of the opposite! Yeah clams get caught and eaten. Only one of you...thats a shame because you are cool.☺ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
No1 Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Jennifer.. there could be many reasons why. Maybe wants to close that door, maybe wants to leave it open, maybe he doesnt know how this one is going to go, maybe he knows he wants to marry her, maybe he doesnt want to jinx it, maybe he doesnt want to hurt you, maybe he doesnt want to get hurt. Just so many possible reasons. But in the end, does it really matter? Our Xs are going to find someone else or date muliple people. It hurts when its sooner rather than later, but they will find and date someone else. Just know it is their loss. You are beautiful and its just a matter of time before you get asked out, if its not going on right now. He had his chance and happiness is the best way to get over someone. You will be fine.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer weave Posted July 18, 2017 Author Share Posted July 18, 2017 Jennifer.. there could be many reasons why. Maybe wants to close that door, maybe wants to leave it open, maybe he doesnt know how this one is going to go, maybe he knows he wants to marry her, maybe he doesnt want to jinx it, maybe he doesnt want to hurt you, maybe he doesnt want to get hurt. Just so many possible reasons. But in the end, does it really matter? Our Xs are going to find someone else or date muliple people. It hurts when its sooner rather than later, but they will find and date someone else. Just know it is their loss. You are beautiful and its just a matter of time before you get asked out, if its not going on right now. He had his chance and happiness is the best way to get over someone. You will be fine.. Such kind words. Thank you. Two months, and I'm still not ready. I've been asked out multiple times, but just not feeling it, yet. I suppose I'll know when I'm ready. I'm finally at the point where I hope it works out for him. He deserves happiness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
No1 Posted July 18, 2017 Share Posted July 18, 2017 Such kind words. Thank you. Two months, and I'm still not ready. I've been asked out multiple times, but just not feeling it, yet. I suppose I'll know when I'm ready. I'm finally at the point where I hope it works out for him. He deserves happiness. And thats how things are supposed to go. Youll date when you are ready and not a moment sooner. I always wish my Xs happiness (after some cursing at them). I want them to be happy with or without me. I know in the end you are going to be happy and find everything you want in someone. He just wasnt the one for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Giblesp Posted July 19, 2017 Share Posted July 19, 2017 No its not just men who do this, women do this also. This is why its best to apply NC after a break up, for healing and to move on with as little pain as possible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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