Its our anniversary

[74Grfs5]

My bf broke up with me 3 months ago. Lots has happened since. On 15th july it would have been our 1 year anniversary. I am having a wobble and wanting to contact him. Im trying really hard to do NC but allsorts of stupid ideas enter into my head. Like sending him a card, poem etc

I am super struggling here and some of you have given great advice. I just need to get past the weekend shame free. Frig i am such an idiot but he was my best bf ever and i was massively in love.

As a man would he be remembering our special date? I did text him two weeks ago a picture of my diary. I had written in our anniversary ( before he broke it off).

He said that life was very strange! Lol

[jah123]

Yeah, send him a poem, write him a song, good idea, yeah..That's just great idea.. yeah..awesome idea...couldn't think of a better... are you CRAZY?

 

I don't know your break-up story, but If you you guys broke up in the past it happened for a reason, so..If he broke up and he doesn't contact you this means that he doesn't want to reconcile - I'm sorry, but trust me on this.

No point to even bother. There're plenty more men out there. And yeah, I know he was your best bf, etc, etc..But you know what? All of my ex gfs were my best gfs. And everytime after a break up I would cry and come back to this forum to moan about life being unfair and blah blah. But the truth is, break-ups happen, it's just a part of our nature. Not every relationship can work out. So if I was in your shoes, my experience would probably tell me to let it go.

 

I don't mean to be harsch for you, but..You'd better let it go. You're free, single..why not just take care of yourself in the first place?

[No1]

If you think that he is going to instantly forget who you are, you are mistaken. He is going to remember special dates or events or even little things like first kiss, but the issue is that you two are broken up and he can not allow the emotion of those memories get to him.

I know you want him to think of you as you think of him. You want him to miss you and feel the same pain as you do. That is only natural since you are in pain. He is going to want to move forward and not forget you, but move on from the relationship. He knows you are out there and its not like he is going to forget what you look like or your name, he is going to try to move on from the relationship. Two different things.

By now, the reason for the break up doesn't matter. Fault, blame or who made what mistakes just doesn't matter. Why you ask? Because we cant go back and changed what happened. You can not correct a mistake you made in the past. Its like a guy cheated on his GF, he cant go back and un-cheat. He has to not make the same mistake. And that will have to be done with the GF who forgave him or with another girl he meets.

You must also get rid of 3 things. Wants, needs and fears. We all get them after a break up along with our esteem goes in the toilet. But if you get rid of the wants-The want for him to think of you, The need to have him back or the fear that he may never come back or you may never feel the same again. Get rid of them, guilt and realize that break ups are really a mindset. Rather than thinking what you don't have. look at what you do have. You now have room in your life and heart for someone better.. and yes there is someone better.

In the end, you are going to be alright. You will be happy again and yes fall in love and kiss someone. It all depends on when you decide to stand up and say.. okay, whats next.

[74Grfs5]

Super thank you No1!! You have made me feel loads loads better. Nice constructive advice. Im going to read it everyday. Reading your reply i was saying "yes" to everything you said. So true. Massively helped me. Wow! ☺☺