peanuttbutter Posted July 6, 2017 Share Posted July 6, 2017 There is a long back story for me, but to keep it short and simple I'll start with that I have been with my man for 5 years now. Its been a rocky 5 years with him leaving me for other women 2 times. The first time we had just moved in together and he dumped me a few months in for a girl he met at work. That was right around our 3 year anniversary. She wasn't interested in him and it ended with us getting back together. The 2nd time was a few months after we got our first house and I moved out. He started seeing someone else a month later. I cut him out of my life but went back to his house to see my dog we ended up having sex that night. we don't usually have sex and If we do its an odd occurrence. The other other time we had sex was around the time when he left me for the first girl. Prior to that we had a pretty good sexually relationship, we lived about an hour apart while dating and when I saw him it was for days at a time. We usually had sex almost daily. What happened was it was all one sided, he got off every time and I maybe got off 2-3 times but mostly faked it. I came clean and was honest and it really hurt his ego. Its not that I didn't enjoy it, I just took a very long time to get there, and he would run out of energy trying. So we stopped. We have gone months even years with out being sexually active. I tried last night to get him in the mood, I don't get naked around him at all anymore but I did last night. he grabbed my breasts a lot like sneak attack grabs. later asking me to get him water then admittedly saying he wasn't really thirsty. When I laid my head on his chest and my boobs on his arm he said he didn't want to do anything further then cuddle. So I felt really rejected. With all the damage done to both sides I don't know if its even possible to fix this. I don't know how to make him interested in me sexually anymore. It used to be the sight of me of being sexy was enough to make him rip off my clothe. Maybe its just because its been so long, this is my first really long term relationship. Does the desire die off after a little bit once you move in with each other? I will add that I did catch him watching porn not too long ago. So I know that he still desires sex but it hurt a little that hes not at all affectionate or intimate with me. He doesn't even kiss me anymore and claims that hes not into skin on skin contact. I don't want to leave him, I want to try and make things go back to the way they used to be when he was really interested in me. So my question is, does any one have any tips to move forward from here? I want to add too that hes into domination type sex where he is in charge and I have to do what ever he says, any ideas that I could do with that? Maybe tie myself up for him to find and have his way with? Link to comment
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