Is it cheating if you're not technically together?

[Hayleyi]

In regards to is it cheating if you're just seeing someone. I recently found out the guy I was seeing for about 3 months hooked up with a girl. We were seeing eachother for about 3 months and things were serious; we even said we loved eachother/were falling in love with eachother and spent a lot of time together. Before I met him I had planned to go abroad for about 5 months but we talked the entire time and contuined to tell eachother we loved eachother so I assumed we would be together officially when I was home and it was obviously heading into that direction. We did get together the day I got home, he was the first person I saw and we have been together dor 2 years since then. But now I've found out about this and am really hurt, what should I do? I didn't do anything with anyone while I was away because I was in love and thought because we were gong to be together then what's the point of doing that when I only want him. Do I have reason to be upset or not?

[ThatwasThen]

You have the right to feel anyway you want and all I can say is if love him and have no intentions of leaving him, why are you holding onto the feelings of being upset?

 

Did you have a conversation about being exclusive or did you just assume because he said he thought he was falling in love with you it meant he was going to stop exercising his options?

 

I think the key now is how he has been treating you, whether or not he is still looking and if you can get over your feelings of expecting something without verbalizing it and being disappointed because your non-verbalized expectations weren't being met.

 

You can't change the past but you can concentrate on the present and what the future may bring.