karennxo28 Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 So this was through text message. He had asked me if I had fixed my lamp in my room yet and he spelt "lamp" as "lamb". And I told him that I laughed at that because I thought he meant I had a lamb in my room and he got mad and said that he hates it when people laugh at him, and then he told me that I got him on his nerves. I thought it was completely harmless because it didn't straight up laugh I just giggled at the text message. And I also thought it was okay cause he laughs at me all the time if I mess up on my Arabic, so why is it wrong if I do it? And I even told him it was cute that he spelled it as "lamb". I just thought it was childish and unfair for him to be mad at something like this. Why do you think he got mad? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaHermes Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 Uh oh. Sounds very insecure, this man. Immature. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeartGoesOn Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 If this is the long distance guy from your previous thread, my guess is he's looking for an easy out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaHermes Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 The OP is 18, and has been in a "talking" LDR for three years with this chap who suffers from depression. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katrina1980 Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 I doubt he was actually mad about *that*. Sure it bugged him but there is something deeper going on here. He told you you "get on his nerves." That right there indicates it's something deeper than you joking about hm spelling "lamp" "lamb." Sincw you're long distance, get on the phone/Skype and find out what is REALLY bothering him. Be open to hearing him out without getting defensive. G'luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karennxo28 Posted June 11, 2017 Author Share Posted June 11, 2017 No, it actually happened, sadly but after all of that he admitted it wasn't a big deal.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karennxo28 Posted June 11, 2017 Author Share Posted June 11, 2017 Yeah, I know 3 years is a long time but it's just the good times we have really just make me stay (which I know isn't a good thing) and sometimes I've been thinking about ending it but at the same time I don't want to because of the feelings I have for him. It's so complicated Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karennxo28 Posted June 11, 2017 Author Share Posted June 11, 2017 I know it's because of his depression because before it got like this he would never act this way or give off any kind of irrational behavior. Deep down he is genuinely a good guy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
j.man Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 Either scarily insecure or trying to give you cause to dump him. Why anyone would squander their youth dealing with this **** is well beyond me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaHermes Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 "cause he laughs at me all the time if I mess up on my Arabic," I ask the same question as JMan. And, have you ever actually met in person with this individual? You've been texting him since you were 15..... I want to echo what MissCanuck said to you on the other thread: "3 years is far too long to be holding out for someone you've never even met. You're not obligated to him at all, and you're too young to be living out your relationships online. Next time a local guy asks for your number, go for it. Stop wasting your time with a boy who's too far away to meet in person. It's not healthy and you're missing out on real opportunities for real relationships." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katrina1980 Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 "cause he laughs at me all the time if I mess up on my Arabic," I ask the same question as JMan. And, have you ever actually met in person with this individual? You've been texting him since you were 15..... I want to echo what MissCanuck said to you on the other thread: "3 years is far too long to be holding out for someone you've never even met. You're not obligated to him at all, and you're too young to be living out your relationships online. Next time a local guy asks for your number, go for it. Stop wasting your time with a boy who's too far away to meet in person. It's not healthy and you're missing out on real opportunities for real relationships." Wha? They haven't even met? Like in person? For three years? This goes way beyond what I originally posted and puts an entirely different spin on this whole thing. I will leave to others to comment; I actually have no words. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karennxo28 Posted June 11, 2017 Author Share Posted June 11, 2017 We are not able to meet because he lives in a different country. I'm actually going there in a few weeks and I'll probably see him. I never wanted to be in a long distance relationship, but it just happened. I don't blame you guys for being in awe for this, cause it is really crazy, but the distance never really bothered me. But sometimes I feel like this relationship won't last.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaHermes Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 So you will "probably" see him (for the first time?) when you travel to this country in a few weeks. What is with this "probably" seeing as how you've been online with him for three years. Look, it is a huge pity you wasted three years. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
j.man Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 But sometimes I feel like this relationship won't last..Dude that's your common sense screaming "YOOOOOOOOO ****ing listen to me!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karennxo28 Posted June 11, 2017 Author Share Posted June 11, 2017 I don't see it as a waste of three years. I'm still young and I have more to live for, and although this relationship had a lot of downs, it has so many good things about it. Even if this relationship ended up not working out I wouldn't regret it having it for three years. And "probably" because my parents would not let me hang out with someone they don't know in a different country. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaHermes Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 I bet they wouldn't. And "probably" because my parents would not let me hang out with someone they don't know in a different country. So this has been a secret online "relationship". Are you going to his country on your own, or with your parents? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katrina1980 Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 We are not able to meet because he lives in a different country. I'm actually going there in a few weeks and I'll probably see him. I never wanted to be in a long distance relationship, but it just happened. I don't blame you guys for being in awe for this, cause it is really crazy, but the distance never really bothered me. But sometimes I feel like this relationship won't last.. This isn't a "long distance relationship" this is a "cyber/on-line relationship" which is a different thing. Originally I thought you had met in person and connected. And were then separated long distance. I understand the feelings are real to you, but the "relationship" isn't, not until you meet in person and can feel each other's REAL LIFE energy, beyond words on a screen or a face on a computer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karennxo28 Posted June 11, 2017 Author Share Posted June 11, 2017 With my parents. Like I said before, I still don't know if it will work out in the end. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karennxo28 Posted June 11, 2017 Author Share Posted June 11, 2017 You are 100% right. And we both know that. I just didn't know that else to call it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
j.man Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 I still don't know if it will work out in the end.Yes you do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katrina1980 Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 I don't see it as a waste of three years. I'm still young and I have more to live for, and although this relationship had a lot of downs, it has so many good things about it. Even if this relationship ended up not working out I wouldn't regret it having it for three years. ^That is actually a great attitude. No regrets, just another learning experience. Personally I never regret anything in life, even the negative stuff, for precisely this reason. All experiences shape us, what is that saying "that which doesn't kill you makes you stronger." This is true! And I speak from experience when I say this! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hollyj Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 Oh goodness. This is a HUGE red flag, and indicator of things to come. You have a very insecure man on your hands. If he cannot take a little joke, I cannot imagine how he accepts criticism. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hollyj Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 "cause he laughs at me all the time if I mess up on my Arabic," I ask the same question as JMan. And, have you ever actually met in person with this individual? You've been texting him since you were 15..... I want to echo what MissCanuck said to you on the other thread: "3 years is far too long to be holding out for someone you've never even met. You're not obligated to him at all, and you're too young to be living out your relationships online. Next time a local guy asks for your number, go for it. Stop wasting your time with a boy who's too far away to meet in person. It's not healthy and you're missing out on real opportunities for real relationships." OP, this is ridiculous. Why do you waste your life on someone you have never met, and who you will likely never meet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaHermes Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 What I don't understand is the OP (after three years of cyber stuff, is travelling to his country shortly (albeit with her parents) and all she can say is she will "probably" see him (after THREE years!). So, does the OP have a name, address and phone number for this chap, and has she announced her upcoming trip to him, and....told her parents that she would like to meet him - and his family - while in that country, and have her parents meet his family. You'd imagine that after three years she'd be most enthusiastic about a meeting, but I am not seeing here any enthusiasm. Wonder why. All of this assuming that her parents know about this three-year online talking. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ParisPaulette Posted June 11, 2017 Share Posted June 11, 2017 I think getting mad about that is a serious red flag of anger issues on this one, but that's just me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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